Why were you in jail?
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DeadlyPerfume
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Why were you in jail?
My friends and I used to very much enjoy this topic on another site a long time ago. Basically you come up with a reason (serious or non serious) to explain your character being in jail at the start of the game.
I was locked up for summoning zombies in the market district and commanding them to help me throw stolen produce at guard captains. Apparently "The Man" isn't down with my humor.
How 'bout you guys?
I was locked up for summoning zombies in the market district and commanding them to help me throw stolen produce at guard captains. Apparently "The Man" isn't down with my humor.
How 'bout you guys?
Last edited by DeadlyPerfume on Tue Feb 15, 2011 11:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Yesterday upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there.
He wasn't there again today. Oh how I wish he'd go away!
He wasn't there again today. Oh how I wish he'd go away!
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Too answer your question I'll quote this in-game discussion.
"I'm the only alchemist in Skingrad. Not much business here, but I can't go back to Morrowind. It's just like anywhere else in the Empire. By the way... do you happen to know what the fine is here in Cyrodiil for necrophilia? Just asking."
(after the reply "Is it the first offense?"): "Let's assume 'no'."
(then after the reply "Then it's at least 500 gold."): "That's nothing compared to Morrowind. Thanks."
There's your answer.
"I'm the only alchemist in Skingrad. Not much business here, but I can't go back to Morrowind. It's just like anywhere else in the Empire. By the way... do you happen to know what the fine is here in Cyrodiil for necrophilia? Just asking."
(after the reply "Is it the first offense?"): "Let's assume 'no'."
(then after the reply "Then it's at least 500 gold."): "That's nothing compared to Morrowind. Thanks."
There's your answer.
Last edited by AKB on Tue Feb 15, 2011 11:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Why were you in jail?
For protesting the unfair oppression of the assassin minority in Cyrodiil. People who kill people ae still people, you know! Just because I'm a bloodthirsty murderer and kill people for money doesn't mean that the government can throw me in jail! These oppressive "Jim Heartless-Murderer" laws are an example of why society is going downhill!
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Re: Why were you in jail?
i mixed skooma and beer then striped at the market district stole an iron helmet and runned naked all over the city and tasspased in the impirial palace (naked) and went to the emperos chambers and started to sing a less rude song. then i got arrested. No wonder why i was emperors dreams
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Re: Why were you in jail?
My character was locked up for...well, see, her father had been missing for a few days, so she asked around at a few taverns in Skingrad to see if anyone had heard any word of her father. Someone responded to her questions with "That fetcher? His corpse is probably rotting out in the vineyards." My character promptly stabbed the offending man in the chest with a silver shortsword given to her by her father. She managed to escape Skingrad, and made her way to the Imperial City. In front of the gate leading into the Talos Plaza District, a guard stood at his post. Much to her displeasure, by the time she arrived at the Imperial City, word of her crime had already spread a fair distance across Cyrodiil, thanks to several messengers who had ridden to a few other cities and told the guards of her killing. The guard waiting outside the Imperial City recognized her from the description given by the messenger, and approached her to arrest her. At that point, her rage had spent itself, and she was hungry and exhausted, so she allowed herself to be arrested.
Poor thing. She never did find her father.
Poor thing. She never did find her father.
youre listening to killed with a brick FM
Don't touch that dial, now. We're just getting started.
Don't touch that dial, now. We're just getting started.
- jakeuh_hates_dunmer
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Wow, everyone has my character beat on creativeness and brutality.
My character and Amusei were very hungry, we saw a decent opportunity to snag a fish from the market,(we both do this very often)
like usual we take turns on who actually steals it. It was my turn this time so treating it like a regular activity, I got careless and the clerk spotted me, smacked me unconscious and as I awoke I was getting yelled at by a dunmer for being an argonian.
My character and Amusei were very hungry, we saw a decent opportunity to snag a fish from the market,(we both do this very often)
like usual we take turns on who actually steals it. It was my turn this time so treating it like a regular activity, I got careless and the clerk spotted me, smacked me unconscious and as I awoke I was getting yelled at by a dunmer for being an argonian.
Man:"Those spines on your head. What is
their function?”
Mere-Glim: “They make me handsome,
I suppose, I try to take care of them."
their function?”
Mere-Glim: “They make me handsome,
I suppose, I try to take care of them."
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Whatever they say I did, I didn't do it! I'M INNOCENT, I SWEAR!!!!
If I knew ahead of time where and when I would need to physically defend myself or others, I would simply avoid that time and place...but I don't...hence CPL...
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urthdigger
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Public indecency, theft, and impersonating an officer.
- Chaos the N'wah
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I was promoting for "The Lusty Argonian Maid"......
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Re: Why were you in jail?
So you're saying the Xivilai don't belong in jail? You're are lucky that after the events of Oblivion you aren't chased by lynch mobs on site.Blackfire wrote:Zey'ryyn was in jail just because he's a xivilai
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Re: Why were you in jail?
"A person like you is only here by choice..."
Baurus: Our job is to get the Emperor out of situations like this. Though I'll admit, things aren't going exactly to plan.
Casandra: At the moment, the deadliest weapon at my disposal is a goblin's head on a stick. I'd be worried if this was the plan.
Casandra: At the moment, the deadliest weapon at my disposal is a goblin's head on a stick. I'd be worried if this was the plan.
Re: Why were you in jail?
Hees a gooooood xivilai thoughAKB wrote:So you're saying the Xivilai don't belong in jail? You're are lucky that after the events of Oblivion you aren't chased by lynch mobs on site.Blackfire wrote:Zey'ryyn was in jail just because he's a xivilai
Spoiler:

- H8Ball
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I was Grand Master of the Blades, invited to all the Royal Banquets as an honoured guest and personal friend of the Emperor. Unfortunately, I guzzled too much Cyrodilic Brandy at the last one and started dancing on the table while mooning at him. While doing so, my treacherous behind chose that moment to let one rip that parted his hair. He wasn't amused. I was carted off to the cells insanely singing "Beans, beans, the musical fruit. I dance a jig and then they toot!" Er, that's how Jauffre got my job. 
H8Ball (ex PC Engineer)
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Re: Why were you in jail?
It looks like he's going to kill the camera man in a few seconds.Blackfire wrote:Hees a gooooood xivilai thoughAKB wrote:So you're saying the Xivilai don't belong in jail? You're are lucky that after the events of Oblivion you aren't chased by lynch mobs on site.Blackfire wrote:Zey'ryyn was in jail just because he's a xivilai
Spoiler:
And..... A high ranking Noble in the imperial city thought it would be fun to high five my Nord. He broke his hand. I was arrested for assault. Pffft.
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Re: Why were you in jail?
i accidentally picked up an apple in someones shop whilst accustomising myself to the game controls
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Taters
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Oh. My. Lol.H8Ball wrote:I was Grand Master of the Blades, invited to all the Royal Banquets as an honoured guest and personal friend of the Emperor. Unfortunately, I guzzled too much Cyrodilic Brandy at the last one and started dancing on the table while mooning at him. While doing so, my treacherous behind chose that moment to let one rip that parted his hair. He wasn't amused. I was carted off to the cells insanely singing "Beans, beans, the musical fruit. I dance a jig and then they toot!" Er, that's how Jauffre got my job.
As for me, I didn't; I arrived by ship in Anvil(mod).
Don't mistake lack of talent for genius.
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Oh. My. Gatos. H8Ball, why must you be so wonderfully hilarious?!H8Ball wrote:I was Grand Master of the Blades, invited to all the Royal Banquets as an honoured guest and personal friend of the Emperor. Unfortunately, I guzzled too much Cyrodilic Brandy at the last one and started dancing on the table while mooning at him. While doing so, my treacherous behind chose that moment to let one rip that parted his hair. He wasn't amused. I was carted off to the cells insanely singing "Beans, beans, the musical fruit. I dance a jig and then they toot!" Er, that's how Jauffre got my job.
Huzzah!
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- Argonanza
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I sat in a bar having a few bottles of mead. Suddenly this old Dunmer lady sits next to me. I, kind as I am, bought her a mead. She downed it in one go, then she called my mother a [&@%!].
We fought for a while and she got a hit dead on. I later woke up in jail with a chronic nosebleed.
We fought for a while and she got a hit dead on. I later woke up in jail with a chronic nosebleed.
- HatofMadness
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I was caught for necrophelia in leyawin.
Capital offense, i was shipped to imperial city prison.
Capital offense, i was shipped to imperial city prison.

Breath.....................Compose......................Stare....................What?
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Qwackie
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Hm...
You know that house outside the Imperial City that's burned down?
In a fit of homicidal rage, I cast a huge super fireball and then exploded a few people.
You know that house outside the Imperial City that's burned down?
In a fit of homicidal rage, I cast a huge super fireball and then exploded a few people.
- heratik
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I was caught trying to hypnotise Septim into thinking that I was the saviour of Cyrodiil and that he should entrust the future of the land to me...
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Framed for murdering a land-owner in high rock.
Transferred to the Imperial bastion for safer keeping.
Transferred to the Imperial bastion for safer keeping.
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Re: Why were you in jail?
Hey you must had been my cell mate!!! So erhrmm, still mad about me trying to kill youHatofMadness wrote:I was caught for necrophelia in leyawin.
Capital offense, i was shipped to imperial city prison.
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Re: Why were you in jail?
I don't get how I was sent to jail while that old Dunmer lady got away without any punishment whatsoever. I demand justice!




