WIENERS!

Here for the discussions and competitions for our anniversary!

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WIENERS!

Post by Generalno1 »

The winners of the different competitions aaaaaarrreee......
Art-Spiney!!!!


Avatar-Nyk!!!
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Writing-R!!!!
Spoiler:
Morrowind - Clothing, Ale and Lute Census
A report by Erris Spires, Wandering Minstrel



I've always wondered what the difference between 'treble' and 'triple' might be. I myself am a firm believer that 'triple' is three of something, such as three shots of whisky in a glass, and 'treble' is three times something, such as the treble 20 on a dartboard. It is a rule in our favourite watering hole, the Foaming Flask Inn in the Imperial City, that anybody managing a treble treble 20, that is, the mythical score of one hundred and eighty, is given a drink on the house. Myself and melodeon maverick Ancius Carro both managed this feat one night - red hot lutist Mercator Paulus, player of the racket Emie Caranne and drum-banger Avalg, who thankfully never indulges in traditional Argonian music, not being so lucky. After sufficient drink we decided, for some reason, that taking our music to Vvardenfell might be a good idea.

I should introduce the tools of our trade to those not familiar with them - the melodeon is a squeezebox, a relative of the accordion and the racket is a very long pipe wrapped around itself in a complex pattern to make it shorter but much wider, and obviously makes a very deep, er, racket. I stick with the fiddle and the humble human voice myself - I cannot make any sort of racket on a racket and I find the keys of the melodeon to feel far too like something from the control booth of a Dwarven forge to be playable. We all met via advertisements placed in the back of the Black Horse Courier - the first advert in that section has been 'A Able Accordionist' for as long as I can remember...

Seyda Neen is where we arrived first, and being a harbour town is the only place where it might be acceptable to play a sea shanty. It is also a town devoid of any proper drinking establishments, the top floor of a shop not counting. So, we set up outside the Tradehouse and started playing (the set did indeed include a sea shanty) and raised enough money to be able to afford the Silt Strider fare to Balmora. The journey to Balmora, particularly on a foggy day, is particularly bleak by Silt Strider, involving a wade up the rather barren Odai river (having crossed a lava flow first, which is supposedly dormant but was full of enough boiling mud to suggest otherwise). Luckily, there is a fiddle tune for all occasions, this one needing a slow air from the wilds of Skyrim, taught to me by a Nord piper in Bruma once. So, if you ever hear traditional Nordic music being played by a Silt Strider skipper in Vvardenfell, you have me to hold responsible for it.

Balmora is an extremely pleasant town, one of the most friendly places in Vvardenfell provided one avoids the more seedy areas (these are anywhere along the south wall - there's obviously something about the prevalence of sunlight there that gets to people). Ancius and Mercator decided to humour a rather shady-looking Dunmer chap, who we later discovered went under the even shadier-sounding moniker of Fast Eddie, and bought a liquor of an indeterminate nature off him that made them slightly less performance-ready than they usually were. Never before have I heard the West Weald Hornpipe, a very simple tune, played so badly. Anyway, after about an hour or so of trawling the town's public houses, we eventually stood in the corner of the Eight Plates for a few hours playing, earning a princely 100 drakes each. Since Balmora is at the heart of the Hlaalu district, and therefore quite open-minded and liberal, the populace (mostly Dunmer natives and Imperial, Nord and Orc fighters from the Legion fort down the road) did seem to enjoy us. One chap asked Avalg where he could hear more music like ours, and was instructed to go to any pub in Cyrodiil on any night of the week... I also managed to use the intoxicating power of a lute ayre to seduce a stunning Bosmer girl from the Mages' Guild. Classy, I know... Mercator managed to get into a fight with two Bretons, snap a string on his lute, lose the money he had been paid for the performance and end up getting chased down Market Street by a local nobleman, a record that even I haven't managed to top after too many bottles of Tamika's West Weald Wine.

Playing mostly in Imperial towns may have seemed a bit of a cop-out, especially as we moved about half a mile to Moonmoth Legion Fort the next evening, but eventually we ended up in Ebonheart, the fishing village of Hla Oad being totally devoid of pretty much everything, apart from for some reason a travelling merchant selling fine silk shirts - Ancius is a trader by trade back in the City and discreetly identified them as stolen very quickly, hinting that we might wish to go out there. Our de facto uniform of checked shirts and breeches for the gents and Colovian frocks for the female element also seemed to serve us well enough. Getting to Hla Oad involved a rather eventful climb over the Odai plateau and through the swamplands but Avalg, being a percussionist, proved adept enough with blunt instruments to fight off any wildlife that fancied an early lunch. The ferry to Ebonheart also managed to liven up the day by having a rudder that seemed to owe quite a lot to Nordic steel mill engineering, meaning we careered across the Sea Of Ghosts in a very ungraceful series of sharp bends.

Ebonheart is Imperial through and through, the Six Fishes Inn being the sort of place we ended up pretty much every night in Cyrodiil. There was a definite class divide in the town, the inn being attended by rich councillors from the Council Chambers and salt-of-the-earth fishermen, who thankfully all seemed to be well-versed enough in Imperial music to sing along to the inevitable sea shanties, turning the standard "Way-ey, haul 'er away!" refrain into a rousing battle cry. I have to say that that night we sounded brilliant - myself and Ancius were tremendously tight, trading tunes off each other, letting each other take the lead, the vocals echoed nicely around the stone-clad tavern and Mercator, Emie and Avalg proved a solid and dependable rhythm section. The freshly gushing Cyrodiilic ale on tap was also a welcome reprise from the liquors available in Balmora, which remain something of an acquired taste. We somehow managed to meet Duke Vedam Dren, the duke (obviously) of Vvardenfell. His quarters were surprisingly accessible and poorly-guarded, and he gave us the customary speech about welcoming us to the great province. It didn't seem that great to me - what I had seen of it was predominantly brown.

For the next three nights we played around Vivec, which was something of a cultural eye-opener. The Imperialised and Hlaalu folk were receptive to our rackets (but never once a racket solo, I promise), the Redoran people were simply glad to have something to do since most of them lived in Ald-Ruhn, the most remote and worst of the four major cities of Vvardenfell. The Telvanni canton's drinking establishments, however, didn't seem to care much for Imperial folk music and at one point we beat a hasty retreat, having stripped down a set of tunes that normally nudges the fifteen-minute mark down to about three. By the time we'd collected our fee and left, a wizened old Dunmer had commenced banging a guarskin drum in some strange polyrhythm - different tastes, I suppose. One spectacularly drunken Nord in this inn (which was unusual in itself - House Telvanni seems to be almost entirely Dunmer) let us know exactly what he thought of us very loudly - "Di yae ken I could sing better in ma wee bath?"

It has to be said, though, that Vivec is a marvellous city. We visited the St. Delyn Canton, with its great Craftsmens' Hall, where we decked ourselves out in new clothes, and Ancius bought himself a concertina, which is yet another squeezebox instrument, and Mercator decided he wanted to take up the mandola and bought one of those as well. Impressively, he had his chops up sufficiently to lead us through a few tunes on it that night, and spent his earnings on what is colloquially known over there as a 'fat lute' - no, I don't know either. On one particularly clear morning, whilst busking outside the Temple, we were offered a simply remarkable view down the grand central canal across all seven of the great city's cantons, lit stunningly by the sun rising behind the Palace. With the sound of the city's ancient waterfalls echoing through the canals, it was an awe-inspiring sight.

The Hole In The Wall in Sadrith Mora should actually be called 'The Clique' - it's the sort of pub where someone will tell you not to stand at that part of the bar because 'that's where Cathnalian stands and he'll be here in a minute', and if you disagree with them (or are not from Sadrith Mora) they will invite you outside for a spot of pugilism. It even seemed to have the Dunmer equivalent of the same man who seems to be in every single Imperial City tavern - the man in the pink linens who regales far-from-interesting stories and refers to his betrothed as 'the wife'. We should have known that the night would not end well. For the first few songs we were treated with nothing but mild indifference, but as the songs went on and the horrible Dunmer liqueurs began to flow more freely, the crowd became a little more rowdy. There were no drunken Nords shouting unintelligibly this time, but when someone threw a pint pot made from very thick glass at us (ably deflected by Avalg and his big drum thing) we decided to flee with our tails firmly between our legs, on the first ship that would get us as close to Cyrodiil as we could manage. It was nice to end up back in Anvil, another town that can appreciate the beauty of a sea shanty.

So, on our adventure we learned one crucial lesson - despite the Septim Dynasty's attempts at colonisation in the Grey Isle, the Dunmer are not ready for Imperial culture quite yet.

Mod Sig-Evenratman!!!
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Sig-Nyk!!!!(again)
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Screenshot-ND!!!, and Tom!!!
I use Tom's as my background too btw


Congrats to all the Winners!!Who's awesome?! you're awesome!!
*deep breath* alright then, we might not be able to give you an award, seeing as we can't give pink coins, so we're giving the winners a blank check to demand something from us, within reason of course

But you're still awesome!!
I'm not arrogant. I'm insecure.
Spoiler:
Made you look
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Dean »

Hehe General said Weiner...

Congratulations on the winnings guys and girls, and to those who didn't win they where still brilliant. We had a 3 way tie in some of them at one point.

So give yourselves a pat on the back and we will think of a suitable reward seeming the whole 'coins' fiasco doesn't work. ( I personally think Leialh is being greedy and keeping them from you, hoarding all those shiny coins like some kind of hybrid-dragon girl).
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Veck »

I didn't win :cry:

Never mind, I'm not fussed at all. All the other entries were all deserving of a win, and I was just happy to participate. Oh, Generalno? You are an amateur at attention grabbing thread titles.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Argonanza »

Congratulations to you, weiners!
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by KalleFlaxx »

Gratz to everyone who won! And great job anyway to those who didn't win! :mrgreen:
Only... In the ancient legend, it is stated
that one day an Undead shall be chosen
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by r   »

Jurassic Park!

I am going to put a lot of thought into what I demand. Is there an expiry date on this offer? Can I, for instance, wait until the inevitable forum meet-up and demand that all the mods throw £500 each behind the bar, with me as the sole patron?
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by The Tom »

Forum meet-up?

Oh hey, my Testing Hall won! I was proud of that screenshot. I never did believe that the emperor had any dreams. ND's is becoming a loading screen for the mod, trust me.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Dean »

r   wrote:Jurassic Park!

I am going to put a lot of thought into what I demand. Is there an expiry date on this offer? Can I, for instance, wait until the inevitable forum meet-up and demand that all the mods throw £500 each behind the bar, with me as the sole patron?
Let's see here..... how about you pay me 500 for all the pain you have caused me over the last year and I'll buy you a beer? deal? deal.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Argonanza »

Somehow, standing there rockin' people's pants of wearing full Blackwood Armor seems very right. You're awesome, ND!
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by nyk45 »

Wait? I won? I demand a recount. :lol:

Congratulations to all the winners, and thanks for both my 'awards'.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Arch-Mage Matt »

Congrats to all of you! :mrgreen:
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Hi! I am a UESPF Moderator and you can PM me with any concerns you have, no matter how trivial. You can also use the report button - a feature that draws attention to a certain post and allows us to offer our own input.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by KalleFlaxx »

Hey, ND?
That's me sitting by the drums, playing guitar/bass (can't really tell which), right? In that case, I'm awesome. And you.
Everyone's awesome in that pic. :mrgreen:
Only... In the ancient legend, it is stated
that one day an Undead shall be chosen
to leave the Undead Asylum, in pilgrimage
to the land of the ancient lords

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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Jeff »

YaY... >_< ...I'm a Wie... :(

:wink: j/k... Nice works everyone... :D
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Spiney »

I log on this morning an see a big title called: WIENERS! My first thought was: TROOOLL!! The I saw GeneralNo1's name. :P

I'm surprised I won the art comp. I was rooting for Jeff's charcoal drawing.

Well If I can't get those pink coins (I think I know why Lei won't), hmmm.... How about a UESP group on DeviantART and I dibs being the Founder? Heh heh :mrgreen:
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Argonanza »

Your non-conformist robot made my day!
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by The Tom »

I hesitate to type, as this may be branded blasphemy, but perhaps we could take the numbers out of my username?
"All right people, we created this multi-billion dollar facility under Cheyenne Mountain so that we can use this thing. Anyone know how?"
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Jeff »

....BLASPHEMY...
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Dean »

@Spiney: Yours was brilliant, one of my favourite pieces from all the competitions.

@Tom: I guess that would be easy enough to do, I'll send the others a PM about it for you just incase they don't see it here.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Veck »

Tom10320 wrote:I hesitate to type, as this may be branded blasphemy, but perhaps we could take the numbers out of my username?
HAHA, I taunt the fact that you need to use a favour with the new overlord to lose your newb wheels.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Jeff »

Argonanza wrote:Your non-conformist robot made my day!
I knew it was over then... :(

It was actuallly an older piece, back when I had time to draw... I just threw it in there, to make the Mods have more work to do. :wink:
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Dean »

Vecky dearest. Just for that Tom gets to keep his favour and change his name, not so funny now is it?
Jeff wrote:. I just threw it in there, to make the Mods have more work to do
So much love from you. It hurts.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Veck »

Actually, it was my plan to help the poor guy out and get his name shortened for free. After all, we do all have Heldor and Leonides (yes, I even stalk people via the archives).
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Kestral »

Tom10320 wrote:I hesitate to type, as this may be branded blasphemy, but perhaps we could take the numbers out of my username?
Meet Tom, and he's a pretty awesome dude.
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Norroen Dyrd »

Big congrats to the WIENERS! And also to all the participants of all the competitions, with their great contributions! :D
@ KalleFlaxx: you are the one with the guitar, you would not part with Hat of Madness, who is on the drums :) .
I brought all the forums members I could find in all the Easter Egg locations (except DaveH, who would not leave his post at the bar). Argonanza would constantly walk through the wall and I had to dive in after him. I kept looking for Jakarius for a very long time, as his house was nowhere to be found, but then he walked out into a clearing and there I sprang out from a hiding place and cast a Follow Me spell on him. :mrgreen:
@ Spiney: I say, does your non-conformist have the Russian letter "Я" (translated as "I") written on his helmet? 8)
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Re: WIENERS!

Post by Dean »

Ladies and Peasants! After messing about with some settings etc. it would seem we figured out the way to give all the Wieners there original prize after all! I suggest you take a look at some of them, R looks rather dashing in pink I must say. Must be his colour.

Congratulations to all of you, and before you ask NO you do not have super powers like the General and I.
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