Ohh the pain...

[alowe]

haha, when i was a paperboy i spent a whole year winding up this dog. i would run the paper along the fence and it would go nuts. one day the front door of the house was open but the dog was nowhere to be seen. the owner, some old lady, was in the garden weeding. i went in and asked where the dog was, just incase. oh it's ok, she said, he wont bite. next thing i see in the distance is this little bundle of death round the corner at the end of the corridor of the house and make a b-line for me. i stood still and did nothing thinking the dog wouldn't attack. about one meter away from me the vicious furrball jumped in the air (it was only as big as a large rat), kinda did a half turn, and sank its teeth into my leg. by the time it let go i had lost 3 inches of leg and blood was spurting all over the place samurai style. the old lady was like, oh my god! oh my god! i never saw that dog again

in memory of that dog

[ironmaiden83]

I was bitten on my left calf by a cat. Totally my fault though. I was leaving for work, opened my bedroom door and the cat ran in and dove under the bed. I couldn't reach far enough under to get him out except by grabbing his tail. He leaped straight for my leg and sunk his teeth in.

[Fiar]

It's odd you mention stapling the finger, cause I've done it. I've also fallen down the stairs in my house twice because of shallow steps, and got a dodgeball in a certain area.

[alowe]

also fallen down the stairs in my house twice because of shallow steps, and got a dodgeball in a certain area.

hello unsuspecting balls, meet mr pain, soon to be followed by mr nausea and mr i can't frackin breath!

[Fiar]

also fallen down the stairs in my house twice because of shallow steps, and got a dodgeball in a certain area.

hello unsuspecting balls, meet mr pain, soon to be followed by mr nausea and mr i can't frackin breath!

Also, stumbling onto the ground moaning.....Yeah, was fun.....NOT!

[Cactus]

The worst pain I've ever felt in my life was ironic. The following is a bit.. descriptive, so I'm putting it behind spoiler tags. Read on at your own risk.

Spoiler:

In 2004 I was hit by a car. I was on a bicycle and the car was going about 60+mph (~96kph). It hit me directly and my face went through his windshield, at which point he hit the breaks and I was forced forward back into the road. I came away with a broken wrist, shattered foot, and a bloodied and battered face. A section of nerves were destroyed in my thigh where it ripped the bicycle seat off, a hole was gouged into my foot, and my entire body was bruised and scraped up. The doctors told me my face would require plastic surgery it was so cut up and my foot would require reconstructive surgery because the bones were just broke, they were completely shattered. My face was cut and gouged and had huge chunks of meat missing, and my eyebrow was cut nearly off; it was actually hanging down in front of me face, blocking my vision. I received numerous stitches. Despite all this, the worst pain was the needle they used on my face, the anesthetic for my stitches. The pain was so incredible I panicked and hyperventilated for the first time in my life.

The one other pain that is either close or perhaps even equally painful was a second-degree sunburn I got several years ago. It was the first time I ever blasphemed...
To really understand that, you'd have to understand how awesomely sensitive to sunlight I am. It borders on allergic. Sitting in the car long enough to go into town will cause any skin directly touched by sunlight to erupt in pain. I get really bad burns just from being out an hour or less. So.. I'm not exaggerating when I say that a sunburn was equally as painful to the above-mentioned accident.

[alowe]

let me guess cactus, you have blond, ginger or red hair?

also, are you from america? i only ask because i swear as a matter of course all the time (i actually have to proof read my posts several times to remove them). it's second nature. i'm not religious but i do believe in god, though when i swear i see it as a cultural thing and not personally associated with god. i just wanted to know if you're from america since i haven't much experience (beyond the tv) but americans seem to take blasphemy so seriously (i'm imagining rows of americans on sundays singing hymns on the way to church or something). is it cultural or religious (or both)? i just haven't got my head round it.

[theJman]

Nearly cutting my finger in half while skinning potatoes.

[Valus]

ooo ive heard Lyme's Disease is nasty. thats the one you get from ticks, right?

I think it was from a tick or something, which is why I don't go hiking anymore even though this happened 13 years ago.

[AEthriel]

I dont understand the joy of walking up a hill for a few hours just to walk down. i understand hiking in places you've never been before, like a National Park, but not the way some people do it.

[Dogmantra]

The worst pain I've ever felt in my life was ironic. The following is a bit.. descriptive, so I'm putting it behind spoiler tags. Read on at your own risk.

Okay, you win. The worst I've had is when I tripped over, and impaled my eyebrow on a piece of razor sharp wood. I suppose that I have a lot of little accidents that fill my quota...

[randomfrog]

i'm imagining rows of americans on sundays singing hymns on the way to church or something.

Only the old people do that.

[Dogmantra]

Just because it's in General Banter doesn't mean you can start talking about Old Americans going to church, unless the topic happens to be about old Americans going to church. It's not, by the way.

I can also list every facial injury I've had from sports equipment.
I have been hit in the right eye with:
A Tennis Ball
An Incredi-Ball (they're those soft-ish cricket balls)
A Kwik Cricket Ball (they're sort of plasticy, and they're harder than tennis balls
I have been hit in the nose with:
A bowling ball
I have been hit in the right cheek with
2 tennis balls
Another Kwik Cricket ball
I have been hit numerous times in the face with footballs (or soccer balls), and one time, someone kicked a rugby ball and it smacked me right across the face.
The final injury was more of a tap, but it was a bit scary, because someone accidentally hit right next to my temple with a hockey stick.

These are all on seperate occasions. I'm almost as bad as Unholy

[The Warlord of Tamriel]

let me guess cactus, you have blond, ginger or red hair?

also, are you from america? i only ask because i swear as a matter of course all the time (i actually have to proof read my posts several times to remove them). it's second nature. i'm not religious but i do believe in god, though when i swear i see it as a cultural thing and not personally associated with god. i just wanted to know if you're from america since i haven't much experience (beyond the tv) but americans seem to take blasphemy so seriously (i'm imagining rows of americans on sundays singing hymns on the way to church or something). is it cultural or religious (or both)? i just haven't got my head round it.

you actually have a good point there.....

[randomfrog]

Umm... Ok, recent injury: I was kicked in the crown jewels with a soccer ball about 2 weeks ago. It still is remotely painful.

[Biotechnic]

Riding down a 100 yard driveway with a 50 degree slope. With a gutter at the bottom. On a plastic Barbie trycicle. On your tenth birthday. And breaking your arm.

[Master Z]

I just had a tv fall on me, and on top of the tv there was a vcr, and on top of that was a dvd player, and on top of that there was a pile of dvds. It hurt, but you people(and cactuses) seem to have had worse.

[alowe]

recently my dad was picking up a microwave from on top of a high surface and didn't realise there was a block of wood on top and it slid off and hit his head causing much blood
same week he left a cupboard door open, bent down to put something in the rubbish and stood up suddenly. next think he knew the fire alarm had gone off and there was smoke in the kitchen. he'd knocked himself out on the corner of the cupboard door with more flowing of blood from the head.
makes me laugh every time i think of it

[The King]

I stubbed my toe.

[AEthriel]

I stubbed my toe.

dude, you win, hands down.

When I was eight i fell off my bike and went face first into a mailbox

[alowe]

When I was eight i fell off my bike and went face first into a mailbox

needed to get away huh?

[5tealthh]

Well, after my thatched-roof cottage was burninated by Trogdor, I ran outside and was stomped by him. I'm the only peasant ever to survive a Trog-Stomping. Oh, and if you couldn't figure it out, I was just joking. Its a good thing that it didn't happen though, or I'd be in a lot of pain... even though Trogdor doesn't exist...

[Codex]

even though Trogdor doesn't exist...

Oh, but he does.
Click.

[5tealthh]

even though Trogdor doesn't exist...

Oh, but he does.
Click.

I refuse to believe it.

[offtopic]Someone should make a Peasant's Quest quest mod in Oblivion, where you activate the quest by finding a "Scalding Lake T Shirt" (the one Rather Dashing wears in the game) and you also find a will on it, giving you the rights to your very own cottage in the town of Peasantry. Then you go there and find it burninated and you swear revenge against Trogdor and go on a quest to Trogdor's Keep where you must face him with the almighty Trog-Slaying-Sword. It would be great. [/offtopic]

[Dragour]

Well once I was at Puketaha (primary) I slid down the side of this wooden crawl through house thing (outside jungle gym area) and my foot felt strange so I tried walking away and just ignored it till I saw some tissue hanging off of my foot so I reached down to pick it off, only to find it was my skin... yup. There was a loose nail on the side of the wood house thing which my foot scraped upon tearing my entire heel.

Now wasn't that a nice story?

Oh and one other time I was trying to cut my pencil in half... vertically, didn't go down well and lets say it took a long time for my finger to heal

But all that happened years ago, all the scrapes and pains I get now if from the kennels <_< say a crazy happy dog decides to pounce and you and their giant paws happen to hit you in... ... well yeah, kind of explanatory that one.