Favourite quotes

[Rose of Sithis]

Whovians are full of rage. Maybe it's from stumbling into all those gaping plot holes.

hahahahahaha I hate Doctor Who

[Goldbrand]

“I have an apple that thinks its a pear. And a bun that thinks it’s a cat. And a lettuce that thinks its a lettuce."
"It’s a clever lettuce, then."
"Hardly," she said with a delicate snort. "Why would anything clever think it’s a lettuce?"
"Even if it is a lettuce?" I asked.
"Especially then," she said. "Bad enough to be a lettuce. How awful to think you are a lettuce too.”

~ Kvothe and Auri

"Do you know the seven words that make a woman fall in love with you?" - Master Elodin

"I need you to breathe for me." - Kvothe

[MissKokane]

"If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe." Carl Sagan

"The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks." Christopher Hitchens

"Science does not stand still, and neither does philosophy, although the latter has a tendency to walk in circles." Peter Singer

[philfredobob]

''I'm not allowed to have an opinion anymore. All I know is that no-one's better than anyone, and everyone's the best at everything.'' Seymour Skinner

[10♠]

"Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth" - Mike Tyson

"When life gives you lemons, keep them because, hey, free lemons" - forgot who

[Dark Spark]

Who said "Life's a [&@%!], and I'm her chewed-up tennis ball." in this big, bright world?

Because if the answer is "No one."— dibs.

[Lorenut]

As someone who is a really big fan of quotes (and by that I mean that I love to look up quotes because quotes can stir up lots of different emotions) these two quotes are pretty good. One is pretty funny and the other one is really inspiring at least to me.

"Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. Then the worms eat you. Be grateful it happens in that order." - David Gerrold

And this is from a game, but so what

"We don't get to choose how we start in this life. Real 'greatness' is what you do with the hand you're dealt." - Victor Sullivan

[Dark Spark]

"You probably shouldn't believe random quotes you find on the internet" - Abraham Lincoln

[Gandoril Spellbinder]

'The needs of the few out-weigh the needs of the many.' ~ Captain James Tiberius Kirk to Spock, Star Trek III: The Search for Spock

'Ha-ha! Got you, you little ruffian! I've heard reports that you've been doing bad deeds! ''Dereliction of Sentry-Duty, Despite Having Been Asked Nicely''; ''Destruction of a Person's Vendibles''; ''Violent Conduct Towards a Person or Persons Without Guards' Permission''; ''Giving of a Teddy-Bear to a Person Likely to Rip-Off Its Head''; ''Accessory to Improper Man-and-Lady-Behaviour''. That sort of behaviour is not acceptable! If you were older, you'd be apprehended and fined by the Town-Guards. You need to decide if behaving like that is worth it, my young friend. I'll leave it at that for now, but think about what I've said!' ~ Oakvale Guard, Fable, Fable: The Lost Chapters, and Fable: Anniversary

'What are the two things that you can be assured of in life?' 'Taxes and death, in that order.' 'Because if the government could . . .' '. . . they would tax you after death.' ~ My mom and I (respectively)

[Hissien]

From my favorite written work, the Bhagavad Gita:

"No one should abandon duties because he sees defects in them. Every action, every activity, is surrounded by defects as a fire is surrounded by smoke." - Sri Krishna

"When a person is devoted to something with complete faith, I unify his faith in that. Then, when his faith his completely unified, he gains the object of his devotion." Sri Krishna

"Strive constantly to serve the welfare of the world; by devotion to selfless work one attains the supreme goal of life. Do your work with the welfare of others always in mind." - Sri Krishna

and Finally my personal favorite:


"They live in wisdom who see themselves in all and all in them, who have renounced every selfish desire and sense craving tormenting the heart. Neither agitated by grief nor hankering after pleasure, they live free from lust and fear and anger. Established in meditation, they are truly wise. Fettered no more by selfish attachments, they are neither elated by good fortune nor depressed by bad. Such are the seers."

I could not find the version of it I liked most though... Words to live by.

[BetaB17]

"The act of taking from others is tantamount to evil. From the moment we are born, we continually take something from others. Life is a succession of committing sin. Life is evil itself. I am conscious that I am evil, and so are all of you. Now come kill me... and I will do the same." ~Yoshimura

:

"I'm not going to protect you by being your shield or armor, but I'll be the dagger hidden below your pillow." ~Tsukiyama

"Why is it that the most beautiful things are entwined more deeply with death than with life." ~Kaneki

[POMC S117]

Assuming the mods are okay with this, I thought I'd resurrect this thread rather than create a new one.

Workers of the world, unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains!

[Dirty Spaceman]

To understand the context, read this as if it's the first line of a novel.

The boy had a bounce in his step and a certain marsupiality of the face; we called him Kanga. But the girl, oh ho ho ho the girl, her we just called Jennifer the [&@%!].

(Source)

[Rezalon]

I have quite a few on my Facebook quotes section. Note that some can be considered offensive. You have been warned.

On Life:

Hidden:

"We've had the Iron Age, we've had the Stone Age, this is the [&@%!]' About Age" - Karl Pilkington, An Idiot Abroad

On Religion:

Hidden:

"Tell people that there's an invisible man in the sky who created the Universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them that the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure." - George Carlin

"God supposedly makes rainbows, is God gay? This is some serious fantasy level [&@%!]... next the [homophobic] Christians will kill their God and become the mightiest warrior people in existence or something." - Sameji, Josh Moronstein vs. Gay Ice Cream

“Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you." - George Carlin

On War:

Hidden:

"I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it." - Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts

On America:

Hidden:

"America's my favourite show on the Internet." - Gabriel Morton, The Ego Review: Poacher (1/2)

"If you're thinking of coming to America, this is what it's like: you've got your Comfort Inn, you've got your Best Western, and you've got your Red Lobster where you eat. Everybody's very fat, everybody's very stupid, and everybody's very rude... [Top Gear]'s not a holiday program, [Top Gear]'s the truth." - Jeremy Clarkson, Top Gear: US Special

On The Elder Scrolls:

Hidden:

"I wish to spare my brain cells from reading MK's off-canon works." - BetaB17, The UESPWiki Forum

"Remember that only things that have been published in Elder Scrolls games should be considered official lore." - Oblivion Fan Interview III (January 2006 - Answers from Gavin Carter, Todd Howard and Pete Hines)

[Rezalon]

A new one from 30 minutes ago:

"I wonder what people who make their ellipsis more than three dots think they're accomplishing?" - Gabriel Morton, Source

[BetaB17]

'A pet Raven is like having a flying toddler with a steak knife in the house'

Good to know

[BetaB17]

People swallow an average of 8 spiders a year while sleeping

"Supposedly while you're in bed, helplessly unconscious with your jaw wide open. Each year 8 spiders find their way into your mouth and you reflexively swallow them.

This plainly ridiculous. Spiders like warm moist places, so 8 is far too low an estimate"

[&@%!] savage XD

[Alarra]

My coworker had a good picture on his desk that I noticed today:

Foolproof systems don't take into account the ingenuity of fools.

[BetaB17]

The [&@%!] my friends say during online matches, cutesy of Alex & Rob(

A) How about you eat a dick!
R) Better yet, just rip your own dick off
R) Shove it in your mouth flap
R) And eat that instead!
A) Just rip it off!
R) Rip it off and eat the dick
R) Eat your own dick Beta
A) Just eat it!
A) Eat the dick Beta! Eat it!
R) Eat the damn dick, [&@%!] eat it!!
A) Gjahdkagaj....!
R) Gdjdksjsgsh....!
.

Can I personal say, I was rightfully deserving that