Post funny, stupid or weird glitches that's happened to you

[dremorababe]

Spoiler:

During the quest "Blood On The Ice", Arivanya, while getting stabbed by The Butcher was talking about how dull and boring horses are. Yes. Talking about horses when there's a dagger in her spine!

[FrozenWolf150]

Paralyze: the most powerful disabling effect, but also the most glitchy. With each of my characters, I've always tried to acquire poisons of paralysis, the enchanting effect, and the spell version as soon as possible. However, it seems the friendly AI has absolutely no idea what to make of it.

When I had a follower equipped with a bow, he didn't know to adjust his aim downward to hit paralyzed enemies, so all his arrows would sail right over them. He ended up wasting a lot of ammo this way, and he provided no help killing the enemy. When I have melee followers (or pets or summons) they just kind of stand over the paralyzed enemy without even swinging their weapons. In my latest game, I reacquired Vigilance since I wanted a more durable pet, but every time I paralyzed an enemy, the dumb dog would stand right over them and do nothing. I frequently ended up hitting him by accident because he wouldn't move out of the way and wouldn't attack.

Can anyone recommend a mod that fixes follower AI glitches like this?


ETA: And here's another one. I knew Blood on the Ice was a bug infested quest, but I didn't know just how broken it was until now. I went through the path of not arresting Wunferth (I never have him arrested) until he told me to patrol the streets at night to catch the killer. I went outside and waited at the blacksmith forge so I could keep an eye on Arivanya, since I wanted to try to save her life. I waited an hour at a time, but Calixto never showed up. When it passed midnight, I waited a full day until 8 PM the following night, as this normally helps the quest proceed. Arivanya was still standing there (she had never moved) and Calixto still didn't show up. So I went to the inn to rest a while. When I woke up at midnight, I suddenly got the quest prompt "Catch the murderer." I ran outside and Arivanya was just lying there dead, but Calixto was nowhere in sight. I assumed he fled, so I tried following the quest marker to him.

Unfortunately, the game had moved him OUTSIDE the Windhelm interior map. I don't mean he was actually at the Windhelm docks, I mean he was outside the bounds of the interior map. The marker was pointing to a location that's inaccessible through normal means. I used "tcl" to walk through the walls, and sure enough, he was standing where the shore would normally be. This is when the quest started to frustrate me. I attacked him and immediately got a bounty of 40. So I reloaded and used the "moveto player" command to move him back inside the map, where he began to flee as he's supposed to. I attacked him and still got a bounty. So I reloaded again, moved him to my location, and used the "kill" command. This was the only choice I had to finish the quest without having every guard try to kill me.

Yes, I'm running with a bunch of immersion mods, but these glitches are in the vanilla game. They just haven't broken the quest this badly until now.

[Dark Spark]

During the College quest, I killed one of the magical anomalies by forcing it to drop off the bridge. A flying ball of light fell to its death.

[Kevaar]

I have the Inconsequential NPCs mod installed, which plopped an NPC down right next to that Dibella statue you're supposed to steal for the Thieves' Guild quest, making it very hard for a low level thief to take it without being caught.

I picked it up and sure enough got a bounty. Guard ran in to yell at me. Or "tried" to. I don't know why, but my Khajiit follower decided he was hostile and killed him with one hit.

So another guard ran in to yell at me for murder, and the follower killed that one, too. And then it happened to another...and finally the fourth guard was lucky enough to get close enough to me to initiate the "stop thief!" dialogue.

By which time, thanks to my loyal follower, I had 1050 gold bounty to pay off instead of just a ~100 gold one. >( Kitty nearly got murdered himself that night.

[FrozenWolf150]

Every. Single. Bloody time I do "No One Escapes from Cidnha Mine" the game forgets to give me back my custom enchanted bow. It doesn't matter what I do inside the mine, or who I side with. The problem is with the script that's supposed to remember and give back my items. Each time this has happened, I've specifically lost a dragonbone bow. Since it's fully tempered and has two of the strongest enchantments I could put on it, it's not exactly a cheap item.

The only good news is that I'm at the stage in the game where I can easily create another one.

[The SheoDovah]

Apparently, Imperial Couriers deliever to bandits. I had one appear after i slaughtered the bandits of the mine near Riverwood and it ran past me. Twas odd.

[Dark Spark]

I was doing business in Riverwood when Alvor the blacksmith went aggressive against some unseen foe. I go running around the village looking for a stray wolf or bear. What I find is Gerdur dead near her house, and the Whiterun guards shooting at her son, Frodnar.

[Mauin]

Today, I learned that Irileth is insane and she has the entire Whiterun guard on her side.

I made a joke Orc a few days ago just for the hell of it. She runs around in Nocturnal's robes killing things with two daedric maces. Well, I wanted to initiate dragon encounters, so I went to Whiterun to do Dragon Rising. Everything was fine until I got to the gate (on my way to kill Mirmulnir) where that idiot Challenger spawned. He's as stupid as he always has been and gets attacked by the guards. Not unexpected.
As soon as he dies, though, Irileth loses her mind and starts attacking my poor scantily clad Orc. Maybe she was jealous of the cleavage. I dunno.
Anyway, all the guards there go hostile with her and I flee out of Whiterun towards the Watchtower. They go back to normal, and I'm able to fight the Dragon without an issue...

Until Irileth gets too close to me. Even though the damn dragon is still alive, she's busy trying to kill me. And she keeps trying to kill me even when Mirmulnir is dead. She's annoyingly persistent, so I wind up disabling her. The other guards -who had been cowering at a distance- don't go hostile again, so I have the little "You're Dragonborn!" conversation, and then run back to Whiterun.

The guards in the City were non hostile again... Until I had started the Greybeards conversation with the Jarl. Everybody in the place suddenly decides I should be executed and, once again, my bare breasted Orc sprints out of Whiterun and back towards her cave near Riverwood (Rayek's End).
The guards near Honningbrew didn't give a damn as she passed (even though she stopped to "talk" to one of them).



I'm pretty sure this has something to do with the fact that my Orc had murdered Heimskr before going up to Dragonsreach. She was never seen, though, and had no bounty... Irileth and her guards must be psychic.

Silly Skyrim crime system.

[Dark Spark]

It wasn't Heimskr's death that triggered it. The Challenger is the one to blame.

It happened to me. Casandra is confronted in Whiterun by a challenger. She refused his demand, but he wouldn't listen. A few minutes later Cassie is bashing the mage's severed skull into the wall, shouting "Maybe you'll get the message now. 'No' means NO!"

Heading up to Dragonsreach immediately after, Cassie sees Lydia fighting everyone: Balgruff, Irileth, Hrongar and Proventus. It took a casting of Voice of the Emperor to break up the fight and drag Lydia out of the palace. Even then, the guards outside were scuffling with Lydia. We got the hell out of Dodge and made for Solitude.

It was the challenger who mucked thibgs up, I'm sure. Maybe Irileth had some money down on the other guy.

[PandaPo]

Who is the Challenger? Is it a character introduced by a mod?

[Dark Spark]

A random encounter in the basic game. If your magic skills are high enough, a male human mage in shirtless Fur armor will confront you in a town. "Call yourself a wizard? I challenge you to a duel!"

Refuse, and he'll still fight you. Even has the gall to call you out if you use anything other than magic while defending yourself from his unprovoked murder attempt.

[PandaPo]

Thanks. I've never played as a mage, which I think explains why I've never encountered him.

[Mauin]

It wasn't Heimskr's death that triggered it. The Challenger is the one to blame.

It happened to me. Casandra is confronted in Whiterun by a challenger. She refused his demand, but he wouldn't listen. A few minutes later Cassie is bashing the mage's severed skull into the wall, shouting "Maybe you'll get the message now. 'No' means NO!"

Heading up to Dragonsreach immediately after, Cassie sees Lydia fighting everyone: Balgruff, Irileth, Hrongar and Proventus. It took a casting of Voice of the Emperor to break up the fight and drag Lydia out of the palace. Even then, the guards outside were scuffling with Lydia. We got the hell out of Dodge and made for Solitude.

It was the challenger who mucked thibgs up, I'm sure. Maybe Irileth had some money down on the other guy.

I've had unseen murders provoke the same response, though. Like I sneak up to somebody, kill them, sneak away without being seen, and everybody goes hostile on me anyway. With no bounty. For all I know, the hostility my Queen of Cleavage faced could have been from both of them. A broken Challenger and a horrible crime system.


Well, the one good thing to come out of that bit of insanity was that I didn't have to listen to Balgruuf's Greybeards speech for the thousandth time.
As soon as I got back to him, he just made my Orc a Thane.

[Dark Spark]

There's a workaround for long-winded NPCs. After you report to Baalgruuf about the watchtower and he begins his three-way with Proventus and his brother, you can interrupt him and have you anointed Thane. He'll resume his spiel afterwards while you walk away really fast.

Back in Helgen, if you choose Hadvar but want to get out of the torture chamber without having to hear him argue with the old man, simply kill the Torturer during the initial fight. You'll get no bounty and Hadvar will notice the locked cage straight away.

When joining the Thieves Guild, after you extort the 300 gold from merchants in Riften, simply walk to the hidden door to the Cistern (it'll open for you), enter the cistern snd run up to Mercer. No need to follow Bryn like a lackey.

[Dark Spark]

Getting into the holiday spirit, I reincarnated Casandra as a redhead (she hates it, but I persuaded her to think it's just blood she can't wash out) hoping this will better suit her when it comes time to don the Shrouded Armor and assume the role of Christmas Ninja. The Christmas Ninja is like one of Santa's little helpers-- except they deal exclusively with those on the Naughty List.

Backstory aside, this time I had Cassie break away from Ralof right outside Helgen and decided to travel to the Falkreath Stormcloak Camp to sell off her loot. Except that the Stormcloak camp wasn't there. What was there: the wreckage of a caravan on the road. Two carts sacked, horses dead at the limbers, and slain Khajiit all over the place. A bunch of bandits appeared in two waves. Meaning that, by the time she was finished with Stabby Time, Cassie was overburdened and facing a slow walk to Riverwood.

I wonder why they set this scenario up: the caravan attack only exists until you show up to Riverwood, then it is replaced by the Stormcloak camp. Play the game as normal and follow your companion to Riverwood, and you'll never see this event happen.

[Varyag]

the wreckage of a caravan on the road. Two carts sacked, horses dead at the limbers, and slain Khajiit all over the place. A bunch of bandits appeared in two waves.

I've ran into that scene: On the road from Helgen to Ivarstead. Started towards Ivarstead/Riften without stopping by in Riverwood.

A dragon died without yielding it's soul or burning up. I hate when that happens. I kill them to unlock the shouts and they don't even give their sould

[The SheoDovah]

That is an annoying glitch. I usually end up having to buy more potions and the damn dovah refuses to have a soul!? It's because it thinks i'm fat isn't it!?

[Red Guardian]

A bonemold shield was floating next to a Redoran guard corpse. And it kept going upwards, and it kept going and going and going like it was some sort of baloon. Never saw anything of the sort. Crazy.

[Dark Spark]

The Giant that the Companions tussle with at the Pelagia Farm when you first approach Whiterun? His club will get caught in the Enterprise's tractor beam and slowly fly skywards as well.

[Mauin]

I'm just going to call this weird... New month, reset data... I decided to install Skyrim on my new PC earlier today and, so far, it's working fairly well. Added the last regular edition of SFO to it and it's running great on ultra settings. Except for this one little detail that I can't figure out...

There's a random black patch on my ground out near some ruins, not far from Swindler's Den. Marker on the compass is for Gjukar's Monument.

I've covered most of Skyrim looking for random bugs, and that's the only black spot I've seen. Now... That definitely wasn't there on my old PC and I'm still using basically the same mod setup. I figure something got messed up in the compression/decompression/shuffling of files, but what that would be I don't know. I've tried everything I had patience for tonight (resetting the .ini files, temporarily removing my landscape textures, disabling the SFO files, changing game settings, even messing with the in-game weather)... The black spot is always there.

I wonder if a Kraken will spawn there? That black spot is clearly cursed.

[SarthesArai]

There's a random black patch on my ground out near some ruins, not far from Swindler's Den.

Are you using any mods? Such black spots can appear if there are more than a certain number of ground types used in the same cell or something, as far as I recall it.

[Mauin]

Yes, I'm using mods. And plenty of them.

I just went through my entire load order and it's Verdant that's the culprit. Everything was fine in that spot until I activated Verdant. Question is... Is it a mod bug, or is it a conflict?

Edit:
I'm more inclined to say mod bug. Even when Verdant is the only mod active, the black spot is still there.

[SarthesArai]

You can only use 6 different textures in a cell! Any more texture will appear black on top of all others. To remove a texture, go into the Landscape editing window and press 'i' in the cell you want to remove the texture. Then you choose the texture you want to remove and press DEL.

[Mauin]

That awkward moment when you start swimming in the air and everybody just stares at you.

Oh, Skyrim...

[SarthesArai]

As if they had never seen someone swimming mid-air...