Post funny, stupid or weird glitches that's happened to you

[-JPT-]

I once killed a Forsworn Looter (I think) with dual wield power attacks in conjunction with the Slow Time shout. Well, he died right when the shout ended and he shot up towards the sky as if a giant just clobbered him. I stood there looking up for about 10 seconds despite the fact that several remaining Forsworn were pelting me with their arrows.

[gerhardvh]

Also saw a few mammoths joining up with NASA for a mission to orbit the planet.

[Mauin]

I seem to have developed some odd, ah, clipping issues with the steel armor. I'm assuming it's something mesh related, but... For whatever reason, the armor is no longer replacing the body when I equip it. Instead, it's keeping the body I have installed (CNHF 2.5, D cup variant for max weight). Every time my character moves, her breasts keep popping out of the armor. The gauntlets and boots are having the same issue.

I'm not actually sure why it's doing that. The only mods I updated were the Unofficial Patches. Other than that... I switched back to an older texture replacer for the farm houses.

Edit:
I had an old Steel armor folder under meshes, so I deleted it. That seems to have fixed the cuirass issue.
The gauntlets and boots are still clipping for some reason.

[Spark]

i killed a dwemer spider and it KEPT WALKING IN PLACE it was spooky

[Ursula R. M.]

Riften Glitchy Much?
Honeyside mannequins are NEVER where they are supposed to be.
Sometimes they are floating above your head.
You can access one through the wall at the Alchemy station.
Most times in the Ragged Flaggon, people are sitting through their barstools.
And same house but different situation, Ursula went there to check on Iona, she was cooking and a guy was watching her. He was a courier. Seemed as though they were just having dinner together?
Ursula spoke to him, and he said "Nope, nothing" as if you were checking on a delivery.

[Evil-i]

I seem to have developed some odd, ah, clipping issues with the steel armor. I'm assuming it's something mesh related, but... For whatever reason, the armor is no longer replacing the body when I equip it. Instead, it's keeping the body I have installed (CNHF 2.5, D cup variant for max weight). Every time my character moves, her breasts keep popping out of the armor. The gauntlets and boots are having the same issue.

If her breasts are popping out of her boots, may I respectfully suggest an underwire bra mod?

[SM-Dreamer]

Lydia got stuck in a cave, so I turned the clipping off on her to get her through something. Forgot about it. Get back to the inn to sleep, and she's... swimming in mid-air:

Hidden:

[garetjax]

I had gone to Apocrypha (Waking Dreams) to finish going through the level prior to starting 'At the Summit of Apocrypha.'

I had read the Black Book in the main bedroom of Severin Manor from the chest at the end of the bed and while facing the four mannequins. When I returned from Apocrypha, all four mannequins walked a couple steps, turned, and vanished. The game froze for a few seconds, then they reappeared as normal.

[thegooseking]

I don't even know if it's a glitch or intentional, but the other day I saw a Riekling Warrior heading west from Windhelm. Of course, it could have just been a mod that added it, but I'm pretty sure I haven't installed any mods that list Rieklings booking passage on the Northern Maiden among their features.

A minute after this, I passed Faldrus, on his way to the Shrine of Azura. I left him to it, and continued to ride to Whiterun. As I came down past Battle-Born Farm, I encountered Faldrus again, this time heading north. Not so much a glitch, but I did find it funny that someone who moves so slowly got there so fast.

[CBR JGWRR]

I don't even know if it's a glitch or intentional, but the other day I saw a Riekling Warrior heading west from Windhelm. Of course, it could have just been a mod that added it, but I'm pretty sure I haven't installed any mods that list Rieklings booking passage on the Northern Maiden among their features.

A minute after this, I passed Faldrus, on his way to the Shrine of Azura. I left him to it, and continued to ride to Whiterun. As I came down past Battle-Born Farm, I encountered Faldrus again, this time heading north. Not so much a glitch, but I did find it funny that someone who moves so slowly got there so fast.

Its intentional, I had Rieklings in Skyrim on Xbox 360.

[bluewind]

I have to say my fav glitch happened during blood on ice

Spoiler:

So, I'm at the marketplace where Calcelmo is just about to attack his last victum. I wail on him and he falls, clipping through the floor with his butt up in the air and everything from his ribcage up (including arms) in the stone ground. I grab and drag him to see if he will correct himself, but he stays in that position making him look like the world's most stupid duck sculpture. I'm still there with weapon drawn when my boyfriend walks in and exclaims "Holy Crap! You chopped him in half! How'd you do that?" I smiled at him and said "It's cuz I kick *** at enchanting and smithing." He must have bugged me for a full week before I told him what really had happened.

Second, I purchased and furnished Honeyside including the enchanting room. I desided to display one complete stormclock set on one manikin and a full imperial set on the other. This included the boots, amulets, and everything they normally wear. I left to go adventuring to come home and find my stomclock standing right in front of the imperial like he was saying You wanna piece of me!?! I laughed and thought to myself that there wasn't even a nord in that armor and he's still cocky! XD

Also, this is my first post here outside the welcome area. WOOT!

[Varyag]

Crixius stepped out of gates of Whiterun and stumbled over a dead giant. Apparently the one from Pelagius Farm.
Now, I've had dead dragons fell off sky but giant...that's the first one.

[Narzul]

Used the carriage to travel from Whiterun to Riften. Astonishingly, Braith and Mila Valentius seemed to have come along! First time I've ever seen something like that. After Braith boasted to me about there being nothing she won't fight, the two of them started the slow, long trek back to Whiterun.

[dedawen]

I recently attempted to complete the Forgotten Names quest and could not find the 4 rings I had put into my chest in the Archmage's quarters. I spent over an hour fast travelling to all the homes I own in case I had put them somewhere else. Alas no luck..... Unfortunately I don't keep every save and ended up having to go back 5 levels to an earlier save. It turns out that they wee inded in the chest at the Archmage's quarters,so why did they disappear? This has also happened with some of my weapons/armor that was stored in chests in homes I own........very strange.

When I built my 2nd house, Lakeside Manor, I opted to have a "store room" built on the north wing. I loaded up one of the chests in the store room with all the temporary useless items that I may have a future need for, such as notes and gemstones. Last night I was making a shrine in the basement that called for a "flawless sapphire" and I went to the chest in the store room only to find it totally empty. Not even dust left.

My guess is that early on in the house's construction I told the house steward that I wanted her to make improvements on the house and she might have improved the store room AFTER I already built it up, and her improvements caused my stuff to vanish. Dunno for certain.

[Chadonraz]

I've certainly had my fair share of glitches, on both the 360 and PC.
Here's a very recent one:

I entered Riften, only to find Maul and Brynjolf (I hadn't talked to Maul, and had tabbed out of Brynjolf's force-greeting) fighting the city guard. No one else was involved, just those two and the guards. Now, I've set all guards as essential (because I hate losing them in dragon attacks), so the fight kept going on and on. Maul eventually switched to "I yield! I yield!" mode, however Brynjolf kept fighting.

After walking around a bit I discovered a dead Imperial courier, and could only assume he (or his death) was the cause of the fight. Unless it was a totally and utterly random glitch, which considering it happened in Skyrim is entirely possible. But whatever the cause, it was hilarious!


A second, older one:

I was going through the Helgen intro yet again, but this time something rather odd happened.
For some reason Hadvar turned into a possessed sled; lying face down in the dirt and sliding around. I know this can happen with NPCs, especially followers, but I've never heard of it happening in Helgen.
I kind of regret not following him into the keep... although I suspect the loading screen would have fixed him.

[Varyag]

Somehow Mânwe managed to dig both Iron ore and corundum ore from same vein. (there was corundum ore vein near by and it got emptied too).

[Dark Spark]

I entered Yngol's Barrow for the first time. With a follower in tow.

The funny part is that I didn't know it was a bug. I thought it was part of the story connected with the barrow: Trapped inside this strange cavern, half-blind and unable to do anything except "...follow the lights...".

I gave up and reloaded a previous save, thinking I simply hadn't yet figured out the puzzle of the story behind all this strangeness.

...
Here's a very recent one:

I entered Riften, only to find Maul and Brynjolf (I hadn't talked to Maul, and had tabbed out of Brynjolf's force-greeting) fighting the city guard. No one else was involved, just those two and the guards...

Same here, except it was Maven Black-Briar fighting a Riften guard.

It's a testament to Maven's character that my Cassie, member of both the Legion and the Thieves' Guild, could watch all this unfold— and she's cheering for the guard.

[snapple]

I can't mine Stalhrim. Did all of the quests associated with Stalhrim (the pick axe and the Forging quest) and am unable to mine it in any capacity.

Very frustrating. Thankfully I am on PC and can console it in, but it takes away from the playthrough.

[Dark Spark]

While running around in the plains around Whiterun, I came close to a Giants' camp when a pair of mammoths suddenly appeared out of nowhere...

...with one standing atop the other...

...who then slid off his back and died from the fall...

...and then the corpse tilted down and dropped head-first underground and out of sight.

Yeah, that was ten seconds which elicited an "Ooookaaaaaaaaaay..." from my lips.

[Lord_Walnut]

I've got 3 that i can remember. The earliest one, I was just exiting Markarth keep, as soon as the loading screen was over i saw a large group of guards that must have spawned all on the same spot, as they were separating and about to start walking away one of them shot right up into the air until there was just a speck in the sky, (while all the others, standing in a circle were using their head tracking skills to watch him go up) as he was falling, (while the others were still watching) he hit the ground and died, then one of the other guards turned around to look at the body and he said "what a shame"....

The second one: I had just left the Narzulbur longhouse, as soon as the loading screen finished, I saw the two goats in the pen that must have loaded into the exact same spot as one of them was violently thrusting into the other one for about 5 minutes while making the typical goat noises

The last one happened just the other day: I was going through the Ancestral worship quest, upon reaching the chamber, where Vals Varen was, the fight proceeded normally..for about 2 minutes, after one of his usual teleports he was lying face down, yet still sliding around the floor, alive.. then the next line of his "fighting dialogue" just so happened to be the "you see, I am master of the arcane".

[Ursula R. M.]

Mannequin Freaks me out! In Lakeside, I enter through the upstairs entrance and the dang mannequin is actually walking over to the pedestal and then when in get up on there it freezes mid stride. Now I hate dolls, so that [&@%!] is freaky.

[Daemos Avetorii]

Not sure of this is a glitch but it is weird. I got offended by some npc and it triggered a long overduel unholy [&@%!] of rage (excuse my choice of words, I mean no harm)
I went tgm and on a killing frenzy. Getting irate that 999999999.9% of all npcs are bloody essential.. grr. So I went disable disable disable.
Next morning in windhelm some dunmer man comes up to me with a dagger and says something about me having hurt their family or something and he wants me to apologize. I refused and the idiot actually thought he could take me. He got a dagger in the heart. lol Weird or what. I never had this happen to me before. added rant. I hate essentials. Stupid immortal idiots. grr..

[CreeperX]

Was playing the DB questline today. During the Death Incarnate, I rushed in to the sanctuary to aid my brothers & sisters... and then I was greeted by a body of Veezara, completely naked except for his loincloth. I... do not want to know what those Penitus Oculatus members did to him.

[Dark Spark]

They were going to make a pair of boots.

[Chadonraz]

I used Ice Form on a random encounter Spellsword, and the usual wacky physics glitch happened (even though we were both standing on flat ground).
After a lot of crazy spinning the Spellsword "unfroze" in midair - like fifty meters above the ground - and cast a flesh spell while standing on literally nothing.

Then gravity finally kicked in and he fell to his death.