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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 9:49 am 
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Okay, I said I would review the story, and despite having a most excellent adventure and then a bogus journey back, I shall.

Spoiler:
First of all, I don't have too much of an idea what's going on. I mean, I know in enough of a sense that I can read the story, but there's a lot of information to process right at the beginning. This might put some people off. But despite the fact you've said that the first bit is needed, I still have to wonder if it really is. Yes, we will need to know all that. But do we need to know it right now? After all, you said yourself it won't be needed for another two books or y advice is that unless it is neccessary in that chapter, or unless it is a Chekhov's gun.

Also, in what seems to be the same chapter, you have two conflicting protaganists. Now, essentally there's nothing wrong with this. But with both characters being slotted in so early, I don't have that much of an idea who to root for. Now, from what I've read it seems that Tobil is considered the "bad guy" and Malfa the "good guy." But bad guys can be sympathetic protaganists. It's probably much clearer once the book gets on its way, but for now I'm not really bothered about the characters. Usually this will develop with a story, but at the beginning at least, I don't really care about them.

But, Good news everyone! I'm liking the scale of the lore, as it's very clear that you've spent a long time on this, and that the lore is properly thought through. I can't find any errors with the lore itself, and the world building is good. You can tell this has been a labour of love, because it's through, and it annoys me when contradictions appear in lore and the world. I can't see any, which I'm quite pleased about.

Now, the writing itself. To be honest, that style isn't anything like what I usually read. Despite this, it's proving a quite pleasurable change. I'm seeing few, if any errors. Also, the pacing is quite good. Stuff happens, but it doesn't take forever and ever and ever. (I am so tempted to put close to a million ever's on that.) But the writing itself reminds me of J.R.R. Tolkien, in a way. (And that is a compliment, by the way.)

tl:dr, the writing and the lore itself are good, and I'd probably warm to the characters. The only thing I would suggest is taking a few of the suggestions people have given in order to reduce your seven-course banquets of lore to delicious snackes of lore, as it's much easier to digest.

Also, this made me laugh:
POMC S117 wrote:
Not only was it a private path, it was also out of the way of the densely populated Market area, a region notorious for its beggars and harassers. So Malfa was safe in the knowledge that he would be bothered as he marched down the hill, the only downside was that the road would at an extra ten minutes on to an already long journey. Ten unwanted, unneeded minutes.


I would have thought he didn't want to be bothered, given that he went out of his way to avoid the market.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 1:38 pm 
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:lol: Funny mistake!

Malfa and Tobil are in different chapters. I didn't space the pages out properly though. It's my mistake. I also only showed you the first part of my story. Laso, I'm going to add a bit onto the first part so that it looks more important. The parts that are important are the Mythics, the Essence Orbs and the Mal-Demons. The Mythics are BELIEVED to be extinct, but they're not. There is one still alive.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 2:09 pm 
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Rest of my story:

Spoiler:
The Entrance Hall was a majestic room. Burning torches that were suspended in metal racks and glittering chandeliers that hung from the ceiling, brightened up the room.

Zilnee sat quietly at the foot of the marble stairs leading down from the Library. He was wearing deep blue robes, studded with sewn-on stars and moons. In his hand was long, crooked oak staff, ornately lined with silver and gold. Nestled at the top of the staff was three, bony "fingers", curled around a swirling Elemental Orb.

Zilnee's staff, awarded to him by the Druid Lord when he became a High Druid, was powerful enough to release insanely strong energies that could distort the very physics of the mortal universe, creating mirages and illusions. It could even teleport whole cities, however that huge display of might required such ability that Zilnee even could not conjure. Tales circulated about the staff, how it destroyed great dragons and large armies. Most of them were fabrications, but a few were correct, namely the story of how it summoned a behemoth to attack a demon that had threatened an entire continent.

If he had wanted to, Zilnee could make the two guards at in the Palace Gatehouse implode, as well as the Gatehouse itself and a large proportion of the Entrance Hall. Instead, Zilnee had chosen to escape the kind way, the non-violent way.

Zilnee pulled the time-piece out of his pocket and glanced at it: 11:09 pm. Where were Malfa and Bronar? What had happened? Had they backed out? Or had they been caught?

Zilnee was interrupted by the sound of footsteps. He turned around and was greeted by Malfa and Bronar, who were each wearing flamboyantly-coloured cloaks marked with the Royal coat-of-arms.

"What are you wearing?" Asked the High Druid, restraining laughter with some difficulty.

"You told us to come prepared." Said Malfa innocently. "Anyway, these clothes are warm."

"But you'll be spotted easily!" He pointed out. "I'd be surprised if people all the way up at Fort Minor couldn't see you."

Bronar began to take his bright orange cape off. "Never mind that now. The gate has been closed; if we postpone our exit any longer then one of the guards will surely find us. Hurry!"

Bronar hurriedly put it back on. "Have you got the bags?"

Zilnee indicated the bulky prominence bulging from his pocket. "Everything is inside it."

"How did you cram them inside that tiny thing?" Asked Malfa.

"A spell." Answered Zilnee. "And it's hard to sustain it for prolonged periods. Shall we leave?"

The three of them sneaked across the hallway, careful not to disturb the watchful veterans standing inside the Gatehouse. Malfa, flanked by Bronar, slowly, and silently, closed the wooden door and bolted it shut, while Zilnee began to mutter a spell to open the iron gate that blocked their path.

"Openio, monsterio gatee. Openio!" He chanted, before the guards locked in the Gatehouse began banging on the walls.

"Hey! Is anyone out there? I can hear voices. Hello!" Yelled one of the sentries.

Malfa wrenched a ceremonial sword from its holder and slid it through the handle. It would hold.

"Zilnee!" Yelled Bronar, while keeping the door closed with his back. "Get that gate open!"

"Openio, ho majesticalio gatee!" There was a grinding noise as the iron portcullis was lifted from the ground and the gate swung open.

Zilnee, expecting to see the worn path leading over the moat empty, was shocked when he saw six soldiers standing there, clubs in their huge hands. They weren't wearing the normal guard armour either, which steel breastplate worn over some iron chain mail, instead, they wore tattered leather jerkins and ripped trousers. They were obviously not working for the Army; they were mercenaries. Pillagers. Vagabonds.

"Hey… Look what we have here. The prince, the freak and the old man with a wardrobe filled with rubbish clothes. Get 'em!"

The bandits surged forward, waving their bludgeons in the air and yelling. Zilnee stabbed at one of the marauders with his staff and he was send sprawling into the icy jaws of the water. Sparks flew from the orb as he twirled the staff around expertly, and in next to no time there was only two murderers remaining: The leader and his advisor.

For a moment, both sides halted the engagement.

"What to you want?" Asked Zilnee, using the pause as an opportunity to gather information of his enemies.

"We're here to collect some heads… For our master To-." Began the advisor.

"Shut up!" Hollered the cutthroat in charge. "What did I tell you about releasing information?" Then he faced Zilnee. "We've waited long enough! You'll die for your curiosity!" He threw his only ally at the High Druid.

The man tumbled along the ground, screaming as he went. The High Druid had to jump out of the way and the diversion gave the leader enough time to take a knife from his belt. He put it behind his shoulder and aimed it at Zilnee's head. The knife arced through the sky and came to a sudden stop, inches away from Zilnee's nose.

The High Druid had contained the dagger inside a magical shield. Then, he flicked his fingers and the knife fell to the ground. Bronar came over and rolled the bandit's advisor into the moat.

"You're alone. Leave now or suffer the consequences." Said the High Druid, a tone of finality in his voice.

The leader seemed to evaluate his choices and spat at Zilnee. "You'll regret this, you fool!" And he turned and ran, dropping his weapons on the dirt.

Malfa was as angry as the man had been.

"Why did you let that piece of scum leave?" He shouted, spit flying from his mouth.

"Malfa." Sighed the High Druid. "There are ways to defeat your adversaries that don't include a violent confrontation. Soon, everyone will have to choose between killing an enemy and capturing one, and I hope to keep capturing and rehabilitating people for as long as possible."

"But he could have killed you!" Bellowed Malfa.

"He could have, however he chose not to. I also could have incinerated him, but I chose not to. Hopefully, some of my compassion has soaked into him. The world needs better people."

Malfa sighed and picked up the knife. He rubbed some dirt off of it and examined it. "This is used by the Dark Ash Assassins; it bares their mark on it. Look, the skull and the fire."

He passed the dagger to Bronar, who flung it up in the air and caught it.

"We should go knocking. I've heard that they have a base out at the forest near the Old Bridge, we could find out who hired them." Bronar said.

"Bronar, you know that it was Tobil. Stop denying it." Groaned the High Druid. "He has employed them many times. During his last conquests, a few weeks ago and tonight."

Bronar was silent, but he then questioned why the escaping bandit didn't teleport away.

"Because this Palace has enchantments disabling any sort of magical transportation from anywhere other than authorised positions. To teleport he would have had to made his way up through the castle and into the King's Chambers." Replied Malfa.

"Are you sure they were Dark Ash Assassins? They weren't wearing the usual outfit."

"Hmm…" Said Zilnee. "I noticed that as well. It's odd. Maybe they're… outcasts. They might have failed an assassination attempt and been kicked out as a result, Tobil would have found it cheaper and easier to recruit them, it would allow his presence to become less pronounced. I doubt that the Assassins Guild, as evil as they are, would even let him hire any of their employees."

Again, the loud banging coming from the guards locked inside the Gatehouse disturbed them.

"We should leave. Quickly, before anyone shows up." Said Zilnee, illuminating the darkness overwhelming the light in front of them with his staff.











Malfa and his companions had left the city, which was desolate with only a few pub revellers hobbling drunkenly through the streets, without needing to traverse any more obstacles. After exiting the capital, they had proceeded across the wide, luscious expanse of grassland known as the Fileteri Plains, carefully avoiding the army that was present in and around Fort Dibel, a barracks/guardpost that was now the military hub of the Crusadian Empire. They had narrowly dodged being caught, which Malfa said was down to Zilnee and Bronar's quick thinking.

They later found out that they were wanted criminals after Zilnee ventured into a small settlement, concealed under a charm, and found a sign nailed to a tree.

When Malfa discovered this he felt an odd mixture of emotions: anger, confusion and sadness.

"How are we wanted criminals?" He asked, while they were travelling beside a herd of placid buffalo-like Nerans. "The only illegality of our actions was that we broke curfew. That certainly doesn't make us dangerous."

"Malfa, you have to remember that Tobil will probably be working on sorcery so evil and degrading that he'll have possessed judges, guards and officials. I'm sorry to say this, but I think that he will have already infected your father."

And indeed he had.

*

Tobil glided through the hall, attracting a large following of goblins awestruck by his recent activities. He had just received the knowledge that a young, male guard had been captured and he was on his way to the dungeon to greet his newest guest.

The dungeon, a cruel and torturous place hidden in the rocky bowels of the cavern, housed twelve cells, each reeking with death and despair. It had been there for centuries, even before Tobil had taken the cave as his residence, and was empty, except for a moaning wreck of a man crying in a damp room.

When he looked up and saw Tobil, he instantly assumed that it was someone coming to rescue him. However, after Tobil had uncloaked himself, he was repulsed.

"Please!" He squealed pathetically, diving at the iron bars restraining him from escaping. "Let me go! I have a family! I have friends! Please, let me go!"

"Be quiet!" Tobil snapped, face contorted in rage. "That's better."

Tobil's heart was pounding, going at double the usual speed. For a moment, nausea and dizziness overcame him and he feel back, clutching his heart.

He wrapped his scaly hand around one of the bars and pulled himself up. The guard was whimpering again. The suffering made Tobil feel remorse, something that he had not felt in a long time.

"What is your name?" He demanded, calmer this time. "I said what is your name!"

The soldier glanced up, shivering with fear and trauma. "C-Claud-dius."

"Ahh… I had a friend called Claudius, before I kil-." He stopped himself, those were human memories, weaker memories from a weaker man. He was stronger now.

"Where were you stationed? Claudius." He questioned, his voice steady.

Claudius had a sudden burst of defiance and yelled. "I'll never work with you goblin!" And then began to sob once again.

"No-one has insulted me and lived for very long! I can offer you a reward if you listen! Otherwise, I don't think your baby will live to see it's first birthday!" He threatened.

The guard stood up and charged at the laughing goblin. "I'll dismember you limb by limb if you touch a hair on his little body!"

"So I have your full attention then." Tobil continued. "I find your rage refreshing, you will be useful. Now, what I am about to propose to you is challenging, but if you prevail, then I will see you and your family is granted protection. Do you understand?"

Claudius nodded. "What n-needs t-to be done?"

"Good. It is nice to be respected." He said. "Now, for this plan I need you tell me where you came from."

Claudius was surprised by Tobil's interest in his personal details. "I c-came from Braeburn. Up in the mountains."

"No!" Tobil sighed. "Are you an idiot, I care not about your address. I just want to know what fort you were located in."

"Fort Major." Claudius answered as if it were obvious. "Just beside Mt. Vir."

"Thank you. Now, I am going to release you." He jingled the bronze keys in his hands. "If you attempt to escape I will order my jailors to destroy you. If you aim to attack me, then I will destroy you. Is that clear?"

Claudius muttered in reply.

"I will then escort you up the stairs and through the corridor. If you run I will catch you and have you killed. Is that clear?" He waited for a monosyllabic answer. "Once we are at the cave's exit, I will leave you to hike back to your fort and disable its fortifications. Do you understand?"

"Yes." He responded and then, with a weak effort of humour, he added melodramatically. "Thou Exalted Master."

"I love a minion with a sense humour." Said Tobil, his tone filled with cold sarcasm as shoved the rusty key into the corroded keyhole.

Unbeknownst to Claudius, Tobil had obtained a poisoned dagger from its covering and stabbed Claudius under his shoulder. The blade penetrated his armour and his flesh.

As Claudius fell backwards, Tobil enquired if Claudius had actually assumed that he could be trusted.

"Guards!" Commanded Tobil. "You know what to do!" As his guards ran to grab the toppling man, Tobil said. "I can trust no-one, that is why I have laced the dagger that I have just stabbed you with, with a sleeping draught. When you wake up, you will be under my control."

*

Malfa sat on a large stone, deftly searching through his provisions while keeping an eye on the horizon. The Fileteri Plains was a vast wasteland of grass with a scarce amount of villages. Farms and windmills dotted the hillsides and shepherds flocked from all around to take advantage of the untouched grass.

It had been three days since Zilnee had met Bronar and Malfa in the Palace and informed him of his destiny; to destroy Tobil and restore Cassini to its former, serene self. It had been three days since they had duelled some assassin, tasked with exterminating the Stranger Prince, and won. It had been three days since he had fled Crusada, his home, under the cover of darkness and embraced his future.

Zilnee slowly climbed up the boulder and sat beside Malfa. He positioned his staff beside him and acquired a small pouch from his pocket. Tucked snugly inside was a wooden pipe and a box of tobacco. Quietly, he lit the pipe, inserted the tobacco and began to puff. A stream of purple mist drifted from it and Malfa watched as it vanished into the sky.

"What I don't understand is why I am the Stranger Prince. I mean, it could have been anyone, right?" He said after a while.

Zilnee continued to blow away at the pipe, clearly formulating an answer in his head. "Are you familiar with King Malfa V?"

"Certainly. He's my great-great grandfather. He was the ruler of Crusada in the year 897 of the Ninth Empire up until his untimely death at the Battle of Crusada, which commenced in the year 950."

"Correct. Do you know why I'm asking?" When Malfa shook his head Zilnee told him why. "It is believed, by many intellectual scholars and thinkers, that he shared a great mutual bond with the Gods. This blessed him with the ability to converse with the Gods through a secret, paranormal barrier. Do you know what function that the White Table at the top of the Palace provides?"

"No. I thought it was just an ornament." Confessed Malfa, taking a loaf of bread out of his sack.

For a while, they sat in companionable silence, the only action was when Malfa offered Zilnee chunk of bread, which he declined.

"Well, I think it was the piece of equipment that the King used to communicate with the Gods. Nevertheless, it is still possible that it could have been a teleportation device, which I believe is evidenced by the fact that when he was the ruler, I grew accustomed to his random,

unexplained absences. How is this relevant to our situation I hear you ask, it is relevant because in the prophecy that Bronar showed me stated that you must open the Portal, through which the Gods will pour through and rebuild the word. Vanquishing evil and spreading peace. And Tobil doesn't want that, and neither does the Ancient Instigator."

"But that still doesn't explain why I'm the Stranger Prince and why it's not Bronar, you or the old drunk that sits at a gutter?" Malfa persisted.

"Well, if you'll allow me a history lesson then I'll tell you." Said Zilnee. "It is hypothesised that an ancient bloodline, thicker than any, runs through your family. It is thought that the creator of it was, and is, a god incarnated as a human, and he prophesised that one of his descendants, who is regarded by the gods as the redeemer of the human race, would defend his city from an attack against a soul contaminated by hate, violence and debauchery, and that when his foe returned, after being exiled from this world, he would try and seek revenge on his tormentor, by killing you."

Malfa, who was listening intently, requested that the High Druid recite the prediction. At the hearing of the words, Malfa felt himself grow stronger. He felt more complete.

"So who is the Ancient Instigator?" He inquired.

"Of that I have no idea. But, judging from the title, it must be an old, old foe. Probably older than Crusada, based on what I can recollect from the books I have read."

"So you've heard about him?"

"Vaguely." Answered the High Druid, clearing away his pipe.

"Is there any thing interesting about him?"

Zilnee smiled. "For you, no. For me, he has a beautiful piece history written about him, though there is no name. He enslaved half of the world once, at a time when humongous, international empires were normal. He also made goblins and orks by enacting malevolent magic on the now extinct Narves and was opposed by many, particularly by the True Empire, which I think is the foundation of this kingdom."

"So where are we going?" Malfa asked, noticing that a dark cloud in the distance was rapidly encroaching on them.

"Mmmm… I assume we would be safer if we took up residence at my brother's house. He will probably be able to tell us more about Tobil, the White Table and the Ancient Instigator. He boasts that he has a collection of incredibly uncommon books in his abode. He lives inside a mountain, his house is built in a graveyard, very reclusive if you ask me. Speaking of recluses and loners, where is Bronar?"

"He told me that he was going to collect firewood." Said Malfa thinking nothing of it. "See that black cloud over there, it looks suspicious."

Zilnee ignored him. "Why did Bronar feel the necessity to go and gather kindling when there is a huge pile already here?"

Malfa jumped up in the air and turned around. Zilnee was being truthful, there was all ready a fat mound of bone-dry wood stacked up beside a smouldering fire. Then, a shocking realisation struck him, what if Bronar had left them.

"That's peculiar. Bronar would never do that, he's too loyal to me. We're best friends, he would never abandon me." He said, already unsure of himself.

"Maybe jealousy got the better of him."

In the uncertainty, the dark, almost surreal-looking clouds had reached their position and had begun to pulsate and expand. Ash-like residue fell to the ground, singeing the thick vegetation, while the ground rumbled viciously. A violent, blue surge of lightning thundered down from the storm and hit the ground directly beside Malfa, who dived to the floor not a moment to soon.

There was an acrid smell, but Malfa's disgust didn't last long as a bunch of lightning forks thumped into the ground in a circular formation. To Malfa and Zilnee's horror, seven intimidating figures formed from the fading electricity, swords and spiked clubs at their sides. Each of them wore faces of pure contempt and cruelty, as if they had been sent on many other assignments like this one and loved killing.

"It's them!" Roared one of the opponents, struggling to make him be heard over the deafening whistle of the wind blowing around them.

"What do you want?" Asked Zilnee, his face showing signs of anger.

"We just want a word with the prince over there! His daddy is looking for him!" Then he added. "He's very sad! He just wishes his son was home, safe and sound!"

"We know that the king is no longer in control of his mind! Turn back now, I don't want to fight, but I warn you, I have stopped armies before." Yelled the High Druid.

Zilnee put a protective arm around Malfa, as if trying to shield him from view, as the thugs flooded towards them. He was sure that they were a part of the same group that had ambushed him outside of the Palace.

At the last minute, when the brute that was in the lead was only metres away from them, Zilnee shoved Malfa onto the ground and unleashed a spectacular display of fire on his foes. Only two outlaws had been hit, so the rest of the small army encircled on Zilnee, intent on avenging there fallen comrades. The High Druid narrowly managed to conjure a defensive spell, just as one of his challengers leapt at him. The bandit dropped to the ground, writhing in pain, as Zilnee had imbued electricity in his supernatural shield.

"Coward!" Jeered a man wearing a black, leather visor. "You magic-users act all high an' mighty, but in reality you are all scum-fil-." He wasn't able to deliver the last part of his colourful curse as an axe-wielding silhouette had appeared behind him and evicted him unceremoniously from the battle.

The recently joined warrior quickly disposed of another raider; nevertheless, his immense strength didn't stop him being overpowered, and soon he was lying on the floor with a knife inches from his throat.

During these events, Malfa had crept over to his rucksack and unearthed his sword. He charged at the crook trying to stab the helmeted combatant, his silver blade glistening even though there was hardly any light.

Too engrossed in his attempt to mortally wound his enemy, the villain didn't detect Malfa's presence. Malfa pierced his fiend's armour and proceeded to kick him in the back. The man cartwheeled over the now helmet less fighter, surely dead. Zilnee, using his amazing magical abilities, expertly picked off the remaining scoundrels effortlessly.

As soon as the last opposition team member was blasted away by the High Druid, the storm miraculously cleared, leaving the place as dry and untouched as ever. The bodies evaporated, Zilnee later claiming that it was down to whoever sent them not wanting to reveal their identity to them, and all other possible evidence was removed in the blink of an eye.

When Malfa went over to inspect the downed man that had helped them, he found out that it was Bronar, laughing despite the blood dripping down his face. He spat some red liquid from his mouth and sat up.

"What a way to get the blood pumping!" He chuckled, slotting his blade into its scabbard.

Malfa decided to join in with the hilarity, and joked. "Not bad! Not bad at all, considering the fact that your arms are about the size of Menol Sol."

"You weren't too bad either, for a lightweight that is!" Retorted Bronar, embracing Malfa in a spine-breaking hug.

"Ahh… I think you broke my rib!" Exclaimed Malfa, breaking of the vice-like grip. "Where'd you get that helmet, I've never seen it before?"

The helmet, which Bronar had found in the forest while searching for wood, had two yellowing, keratin horns protruding from its iron base. Three dents marked the surface.

"Why'd you go looking for firewood if we've already got some?" Queried Malfa.

"What?" Yelled Bronar. "I spent ages looking for some wood to burn when we had some! I guess you'll be ok when I say I dropped it when I was coming to help you."

"Let's get a move on, shall we? If we don't hurry, then Zilnee will be gone. You know, he surprises me some times with his athletic capability."

Bronar snorted. "Yeah! For an old man he's astoundingly agile! He must be, what, two hundred and fifty years old."

Malfa and Bronar raced across the grass, eager to be the first one to catch up with Zilnee. As they neared the old man, Bronar sent Malfa sprawling to the floor with a well-aimed elbow.

"You shouldn't treat your friends like that, Bronar. One day you might wake up and find him dead." Said Zilnee.

Bronar raised an eyebrow. "Ok."

"Only joking. Sometimes my pessimism gets the better of me. Anyway, nice hit." Apologized the High Druid, stopping so that Malfa could catch up on them.

"Thanks."

"Did Ronar teach you that?" Questioned Zilnee.

Bronar nodded. "Why do you ask?"

"Hmmm… He could be vital in helping Malfa on his quest. How many people does he command?"

"Erm… I think it's in the region of about two thousand to three thousand people." Replied Bronar.

"And he also has control over a small quantity of the populace living in Drooding." Zilnee carried on asking, despite the fact that he already knew the answer. "Is that correct?"

"Certainly. But how is this important?"

"I'll explain later. Ahh… Malfa, I see you've caught up with us. Come on, hurry up!" Said Zilnee with a voice of conclusiveness.

In the distance, shrouded from sight, a winged figure stalked its prey patiently, waiting and watching, trying to discover their ways. Swooping through a cloud, the beast observed the three people ambling leisurely towards a stone bridge.












After their little duel with the assassins, Malfa and his associates journeyed across the valley, setting up camp after a few hours. At daybreak, they crossed over the Old Bridge, carefully evading the stern-looking toll-man who guarded the little stone crossing. At the banks of a small river, Bronar began to fish, vigilantly looking around to check if he was being watched, and after a while he had got them enough food to last them until they reached Kashagara's home.

From there, they had travelled 12 miles to the west, before traipsing through a stony ridge. The ridge, known to locals as the Dark Gulch, surrounded a greenish-looking loch, and was the only apparent way to cross the river without going across the bridge.

With a touch of anxiety, Malfa warily edged along a rough path, made by hundreds of feet passing through it every year. A trickle of dust fell into the still lagoon, sending ripples pulsing through it.

"This pathway is very unstable!" Shouted Malfa. "Can we turn back?"

Zilnee was just about to make a verdict when a big section of the rock shattered and tumbled into the water. Bronar, who was walking on it, managed to cling on to a strong root, while Malfa and Zilnee walked back to assist him. The root that Bronar was dangling from snapped, just as Malfa reached down to grab him. It was close, but at the last second Bronar had stretched his arm up and grabbed Malfa's sweaty hand. The gap, which had almost "eaten" Bronar, was too large for them to jump.

"I guess that means we'll have to keep going this way. " Decided the High Druid.

For hours, they snaked along the edge, only halting when they reached the other side of the valley. It was nighttime; the sky was a pristine purple as a result, only spoiled by the vast amount of yellow stars hanging in space and the bright, luminous moon.

Soon, they had erected a shabby camp, complete with a roaring fire and a tattered tent. Sitting in silence, Malfa, Bronar and Zilnee wolfed down some fish and dried herbs, listening to the crackling embers. When Bronar finished eating, he went around and collected the remains of tonight's dinner: bones and stinking guts. He disposed of the smelly assortment by throwing it in a tiny hole.

"So, where is your brothers house?" Wondered Malfa aloud.

Zilnee stretched his head upwards and peered at the horizon. Located far away, only discernible as an outline, was some towering, snow-capped mountains, obtruding from the mostly flat land.

He pointed towards to them. "Over there. His home is inside that giant mountain, Menol Fal I believe it's called."

"How far away is it? Will we be there by tomorrow?"

"Perchance. It is humanly possible, and it's only about ten kilometres away. As the crow flies." Answered Zilnee.

Malfa scanned his surroundings, spotting blooming flowers, coniferous trees and meandering streams. Over to his left was some shrubbery, overgrown and wild, bordering a dirt walkway, while at his right was the remnants of a now burnt house. Daises covered the ground like vast white curtains and weeds thrived.
As his eyes wandered up to the sky, he saw a faded shadow soaring in the heavens. It had a slight draconic look to it and Malfa was startled.

"Look!" He exclaimed, jumping to his feet in shock. "Is that a dragon?"

Zilnee whirled around, while Bronar walked over to see what was the cause of the commotion.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Can you see that?" Malfa replied. "Look! Up there in the sky, it's a dragon!"

Zilnee stared at the speeding outline. "It's merely a bird." He responded, already unsure of himself. "Dragons haven't been seen on Eusiac for over five hundred years. The nearest place to us that they inhabit is the Island Archipelagos of Planeteri, that's more than one thousand miles away. There is no-way that a dragon could fly that distance on its own, contrary to popular belief they are extremely sociable creatures, they would die of loneliness if they came this far on there own."

"It could've immigrated along with some of its friends." Said Malfa, still watching the clouds.

"It is possible, but dragons aren't the type of beasts to make long, sporadic ventures into unknown territory without good reason. They've been frightened of us since the time of King Malf III. The only ones audacious enough to attack us are the Great Black Dragons and the Elders. Besides, the Eagles of Menol Sol would have sensed their presences and alerted me accordingly." He answered.

"It's gone now." Informed Bronar. "Maybe it was just an illusion or an oddly shaped cloud. Let's get some sleep."

Zilnee and Bronar walked into the tent, leaving Malfa outside. Malfa was sure that it wasn't just a bird or a figment of his imagination, he was certain that it was a dragon. However, as he searched the sky once more, he thought to himself that maybe it was his overactive mind seeing figures in the clouds.

When he retired for the night, a large creature soared through the air, glad that it hadn't been caught. It would follow its quarry until it had cornered itself. Then it would strike.

*

After what seemed like years, Malfa and his cohorts reached the outskirts of Menol Fal. Menol Fal, Elvish for the Mountain of Solitude, was the third largest mountain in Mithraleen and rightly named as it not only housed a hermit, but was also the only rocky prominence for miles around. It was also partially hidden behind seas of trees and bushes and there were no visible entrances.

After circling the perimeter of the mountain twice, Malfa complained. "We've been going round in circles for ages, are you even sure that this is the correct place?"

Zilnee growled. "I've already told you that this is the exact place. We just need to find a peculiar-looking rock and then I'll cast a few spells. Hopefully the opening will appear and we'll be able to go inside."

Bronar, who had been scrutinizing the ground closely, found the abnormal stone and shouted. "Is this it?"

Zilnee trotted over to him, using his staff for support. He seized the rock from Bronar and examined it. The stone looked more like a statuette than anything. It depicted a man, withered away by years of arduous labour, with broad shoulders and a grim face. Three vertical scars were streaked across his face and his marble hair was matted with dirt. He carried a bag of supplies and a stick.

"Yes!" Yelled Zilnee. "This is it, the Sculpture of Isolation."

The High Druid proceeded to place the small statue at the foot of the mountain, chanting:

"Mountainio etr Soltines,
Jen Bringiy non Dangerou,
Inosted, Jen Bringiy Hopee,
Openio, etn Jen wil Showen Nej!"

Streams and rivers of glittering gold liquid flowed from Zilnee as he spoke, each new syllable marked with a brighter explosion of yellow. Gradually, the colourful fluid, which passed right through Malfa and Bronar as if they were non-existent, circled a specific part of the rock, forming a shape around it. Then, hardly visible because of a surreal mist swirling near it, the golden rivulet started to solidify. Suddenly, a thunderous noise pierced the still sky, causing a flock of birds to empty from a near-by forest, and a large hole was blasted into the mountain about thirty metres above Malfa, Bronar and Zilnee.

Miraculously, there was no cave-in and only a gentle trickle of pebbles escaped the newly-built cavern entrance. Malfa groaned as they were going to have to scale the steep, hazardous mountain. Even though the opening was only a few mere metres away, the section that they had to climb was extremely precipitous and nigh-on vertical.

After an hour, they had managed to ascend to the same height as the doorway, however they did not survive unscathed. Almost every inch of Malfa's body was covered with ugly, purple bruises, long and bleeding cuts, lacerations and gaping gashes. Bronar was practically in the same condition, with Zilnee being the only one to be relatively unhurt.

When the High Druid arrived at him, after healing Bronar, Malfa questioned him about it. Zilnee responded by saying that his aptitude for magic had granted him a type of immunity against physically damage.

"So if I become magically adept then I'll be resistant to being stabbed?" Said Malfa, a hint of humour in his voice.

"Well, I suppose in theory that that would be possible, however even my magical proficiency only allows invulnerability towards minor wounds." He replied, putting his hands over Malfa's many injuries.

Bit by bit, Malfa's skin was sealed up and any indication that he had ever cut himself whilst clambering up the mountain was removed. Malfa thanked his healer and stood up, stretching and checking to see if Zilnee had forgotten to mend any scratches.

Bronar also stood up and trotted over to Malfa, asking if they were going to camp outside or go in. Malfa let Zilnee decide; not only because he was easily the smartest of the three, but also because it was his brother's abode that they were entering.

"Mmmm…" Mumbled Zilnee, his hand resting on his chin. He glanced around and saw that it was still early in the morning so it was probable that they would reach Kashagara's house by sundown. "We should. My brother's house is located directly at the heart of the mountain so if we don't leave now we'll most likely have to sleep outside, and let me warn you, things darker than even the most hostile troll inhabit this mountain."

Bronar, who had been designated as the "pack-mule", swung the bag holding their provisions over his shoulder and followed Malfa and Zilnee inside, through the large stone breach. Little did they know that a ravenous, heartless atrocity was also pursuing them.

*

The huge cavity inside the Mountain of Solitude was little more than a bewildering, disorientating labyrinth, with a maze of paths that broke off from the main one, forming entirely new sections. Deposits of silver and gold, too diminutive in quantity to make a profit from, lined the sloping walls and the remains of a once technologically advanced civilization lay strewn along the floor. Creeping mounds of dry moss crawled through the cave, projecting through cracks and holes. Bones of animals, big and small, lay in a messy heap, most showing signs of violence and a struggle. The cavern smelt of decay and isolation, as if no one had ever walked through halls, however, the proof on the ground told a different story.

From the pickaxes and hammers tucked neatly on the walls, Malfa presumed that the mountain had once been a dwarven mine. The Dwarfish statues and models hidden between fractures in the stone further supported his theory. There were also some Elvish items concealed secretly under piles of rock, giving Malfa a feeling that this had once been home to the now vanished race of Mountain Elves.

The whole mountain appeared to be a treasure trove of lost knowledge, useful and useless. As he was a Druid, and naturally inquisitive, Zilnee often made odd remarks when he saw the broken equipment, ranging from one-worded whispers to long exclamations, usually making Bronar chuckle.

"What's so interesting?" asked Malfa, obviously irritated by the High Druids pointless statements and observations.

Zilnee faced Malfa wearing a look of surprise. "This whole cave! The murals on the wall, the technology, the traces of a once powerful nation, superior to our own!"

They strolled along in silence, uninformed of the stealthy figure, dressed in red, sneaking behind them. It had been chasing them since they set foot in the cave, guarding it and protecting it. It wielded a sword and a bow, though, following its masters bidding, it had not used them.

For hours, without eating or resting, Malfa and his friends trudged through the spiralling roads, frequently taking a wrong turning and having to plod back again. The regular incorrect turns caused Malfa to have an angry outburst.

"Where is your brother's house Zilnee? We have been travelling for ages without food or water and we're not even there yet!"

"Okay then." Said Zilnee in a tone of resign. "We will rest, but hurry up! We'll have to move soon."

Malfa quickly dived a Bronar, knocking his bags off of his shoulder. Hastily, he ripped one open and deftly snatched a juicy apple from within. Malfa's unusually loud crunching and munching punctuated the air for several minutes. Bronar and Zilnee eat slower, and with more etiquette.

Malfa licked his lip and speedily went for another apple, which he devoured even faster than the last one. By the time Malfa had finished his fourth apple, Zilnee and Bronar were just finishing their second.

"I guess we know who invented gluttony." Bronar chuckled, wiping his face with the back of his hand to remove the crumps left by his meal.

Malfa was just about to pilfer a fifth one, however, Zilnee apprehended him. "We'll need all the food we can get to reach where we're needing to go to. If you keep munching it all then we'll starve or we'll have to pick berries and hunt deer."

"Where is it we are going, exactly?" Questioned Malfa.

"All will be revealed later." Answered the High Druid, as if he hadn't even acknowledged Malfa's question as an enquiry. "Now, have some water."

Malfa took the water suspiciously before gulping in down. He then raised an eyebrow when Zilnee didn't scold him for downing the whole contents.

After their short break, they travelled into an area of the cavern where junction and intersections were a rarity. It comprehensible that this part of the cave was used more as apple cores and rotten food were scattered around the path.

"Are we there yet?" Queried Malfa.

"No." Said Zilnee.

"How about now?"

"Not yet!" Zilnee groaned, his face slowly turning into a hue of red.

Eventually, when Malfa had asked for the thirteenth time, Zilnee said. "Yes!"

Malfa and Bronar stared at where Zilnee was pointing: an impassable wall. The barrier, which was surrounded by a variety of thriving plants not found anywhere else in the cave, was sanded down and smooth, unlike the rest of the walls in the grotto that were rough and jagged. For a moment, Malfa thought that his relentless barrage of meaningless questions had rendered the High Druid into a crazy lunatic, but that changed when he strode through the rock as if it weren't there.

Malfa and Bronar exchanged shocked looks. "How did he do that?"

"He must have used magic! That means that we're stuck until he chooses to come back and rescue us!" Moaned Bronar.

"Well he better hurry up! This place is making me shiver, and it feels haunted."

Bronar gasped in fright as a shocking realisation hit him. "Do you remember what the High Druid told us? About the sentinels that protect this place!"

Malfa drew his steel sword, just as a Wraith, half-corporeal, half-ethereal beings dedicated to guarding certain holy places after being damned by the Gods, floated around an angle. The spectre emitted a low, sorrowful noise from its mouth that was perpetually open and its ragged, red cloak flapped madly, even though there was no breeze. In its misty hand, held firmly, was a long, silver dagger, encrusted with the blood of intruders.

As it hovered towards Malfa and Bronar, all of the vegetation turned into ice, due to the frost generated by the phantom's callousness. Malfa knew that Wraiths had a fatal weakness towards fire, however he was too unskilled to even attempt a weak fire spell.

When the ghost was a few feet away from Malfa, raising its hands to get enough power to make his attack lethal, Malfa swiped at it. His sword cut through the air and almost took the spirits head off, however, his assault was futile as his enemy executed a well-timed dodge.

The Wraith advanced on Malfa, gradually sapping him of all his strength, and then lashed out at him, knocking Malfa to the ground. The ghost bent over and began to vanquish Malfa, but Bronar, who had surreptitiously got behind the monster, drove his weapon into its skull, stopping him instantly. The phantom screamed and howled in pain, before exploding into tiny particles that were soon evaporated.

The red rag drifted into the air and wrapped around a metal pole. "It looks like a flag." Observed Bronar, as the torn material rippled slightly.

Malfa ignored this comment. "How do we get through?"

Immediately, his question was answered when the face of a dishevelled, dirty man with a long and crooked nose popped out of the block of stone. "Hurry up, will you!" He croaked, in a voice reminiscent of Zilnee's. "I don't want another ghoul passing by here with you destroying it, do you know how hard they are to find? You can't just walk down to the local store and demand one!"

And without further ado, his head vanished. Malfa and Bronar swapped confused stares and shrugged. "We may as well try." Said Bronar.

Malfa edged suspiciously towards the oddly illuminated wall, worried to think what would happen if he couldn't get through. As soon as his hand connected with the rock, he felt as if he was submerged in freezing water. Icy daggers stabbed him brutally and every single nerve in his body screamed at him, telling him to get out of the cold. For a second, he couldn't breathe and his lungs filled with an ice-like material. He could hear his heart hammering away, trying to defy the cold and pump blood around his body.

Pg 36 The Holy House of Blueblood


Spots began to form in his eyes and he felt the frosty claws of Death wrap around his neck. Soon, he would be a cadaver, rigid and frozen. He tried to push through but his only movements were spasms. Suddenly, he sensed arms wind around his arms, however they didn't belong to Death.

As Malfa was dragged through the wall and rested on the ground, he heard a familiar voice shout.

"Brother, your "security measures" almost killed the person we are supposed to protect! Go and do something useful, like telling Bronar how to get here without dying."

Malfa opened his eyes. His vision was imprecise, hazy. He groaned as a figure marched by him and disappeared. A second shape came into view, a concerned look on its old, withered face.

"Are you alright?" It asked. "It's me Zilnee." Malfa gave him a baffled stare. The High Druid chuckled. "Come on boy! Surely you remember me. No?"

"Oh… You." Muttered Malfa, his vision recovering.

Zilnee helped him up, chortling. "You could be a bit more thankful. I just saved your life. Anyway," He said. "Welcome to my family home. The Holy House of Blueblood."

_________________
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Pg 37 Dragons, In my Cave?

Kashagara's house, a gloomy place with a never-dispersing mist, was built in a graveyard. For hundred's of years, it had been home to many Bluebloods and their relatives. Due to it's age, and magical significance, it had been granted the highest honour, it had received it's own wizard to protect it, and that wizard was Kashagara, one of the last Bluebloods.

The house itself was located on expansive piece of grassland, with the garden walls stretching for 20 metres. Inside the garden, covered in moss and weeds, were three rows of tombstones, each one being more crumbled and ancient than the last. Overall, there were 21 headstones, marking the resting place of a Blueblood, some celebrated, others unknown.

An aura of mysticism surrounded the dwelling and the areas around it. Even though it was confined inside a huge tunnel, which in turn was inside a mountain, a large, yellow orb hung in the air like the sun. An allotment was tucked behind the stone house and was responsible for nearly every bit of food that went into the larder. As it was enchanted, it grew bigger and tastier vegetables and fruits at an accelerated rate.

The residence was constructed from granite, smooth and pristine. It was two stories high, with an attic situated in the tiled roof. In total, there were twelve rooms: four bedrooms, small and cosy; a kitchen, filled with food; a storage area, cluttered with alchemical ingredients; a sitting room, wide and comfy; a cellar, which housed wine and ale; a hallway, long and narrow; an outhouse, smelly and wet; an attic and a study, which substituted for a potions room as well as a room to learn the magical arts.

No windows could be seen from outside, however, inside, you could spy on people without fear of being caught. A well, filled with ever-replenishing water, sat about forty metres away from the garden.

The grass was green and healthy; something that Malfa found odd due to the fact that it was inside a mountain and it could never possibly rain. He asked Kashagara about this as they walked across the ground to reach the mansion. "Erm… Kashagara." The elderly man grunted. "How come the grass is so green? We're in the middle of a mountain for Kyvrosh's sake!"

"Isn't it obvious?" Said Kashagara. "Environmental charms. I can make it rain with the click of my fingers." He demonstrated. He snapped his fingers and clouds began to appear just below the roof of the cave. They swirled around, darkening the place, before popping and unleashing a torrent of rainwater. Kashagara waved his hand in front of his face and the clouds dispersed.

Malfa stood still, gazing up at the air in amazement while his companions walked away. He tried clicking his fingers, trying to recreate the effects but to no avail. "Come on boy! What do you think you are doing? I see brains doesn't run in the family!"

Bronar sniggered as Malfa ran to catch up with them. "That's an accurate prediction, Kashagara." The old man's eyes, hardly ever showing emotion, twinkled.

"Brother, there's no need to be so hard on the boy. He's been through a lot." Zilnee informed him.

"I suppose so." Mumbled Kashagara. "Where do you plan on going? You told me that you would only be staying here for a week. That was the arrangement."


Pg 38 Stranger Prince

They passed the low garden wall, white and, like everything in the house that wasn't furniture, made of granite. "Mmmm… I think it would be prudent for us to go to Drooding. It would be safer to be in a defensible town rather than out in the open, where we could fall prey to numerous creatures."

"And you are sure that Ronar would let you stay there?" Questioned Kashagara, pointing his fingers at the door, which opened.

"I believe so." Replied the High Druid.

"So, where would you go from there?" They went inside the house. The hall, which was thin and filled with cabinets and counters, travelled throughout the whole house, linking all the rooms, other than the bedrooms upstairs, together.

"I think that heading to Khazaduru would be the correct course of action. If I am not mistaken, Malfa's mother, who is away on official business, is a cousin of King Belleen III, the ruler of all Eastern Dwarven domains in Mithraleen." He answered.

"Why may I ask?" Said Malfa and Kashagara in unison, as they headed into the sitting room. Zilnee's brother burst out laughing. "You haven't told the boy why you are shifting him about the earth!" This was a statement rather than a question.

The High Druid looked nervous. "I have told him what he needs to know. To add anything more to his confusion and frustration would only burden him."

Bronar flung himself into an armchair, receiving mean stares off of Kashagara in the process. "Don't forget the little people!"

The owner of the house clapped his hands together gleefully; it looked like he was taking pleasure in his brother's discomfort. "So you expected Bronar to tag along without him knowing?"

"Knowing about what?" Yelled Malfa.

"I told each of them about the prophecy." Said Zilnee, finding a voice.

Kashagara slowly sank into a seat, an interested look on his face. "What prophecy is this?"

The High Druid dragged the table beside the fireplace, which was packed with ornaments, nearer, casting the paraphernalia onto the floor. He conjured up a quill, some ink and a piece of parchment. He began scribbling, jotting down notes and explanations of what each stanza meant. He handed it over to his sibling, who took it eagerly and began to read intently.

His mood went from curiosity, to intrigue, and then finally to fear. He gulped. "So it is true. Tobil has returned, and he has discovered the importance of the Loudhorns."

"Excuse me." Piped up Malfa. "What's the Loudhorns?"

Zilnee sighed. "The Loudhorns are mysterious artefacts, thought to halt the Mal-Demons, Snell, Sell and Sbell, from returning to the Universe. There are three of them, one for each of the demons, scattered around the planet. The last one, more important than the other two put together, stops Sbell, who is the lead Demon and arguably the strongest, from revisiting.


Pg 39 Dragons, In my Cave?

It has was broken into three pieces long ago; one is located in the Palace, hidden somewhere; another is said to have been given to the Dwarves over two thousand years ago; and the final one is alleged to be placed in the most remote territory governed by any kingdom on Mithraleen."

"What are the Mal-Demons?"

Kashagara answered. "The Mal-Demons, commonly known as Dark Demons, are the foulest beings possible to encounter. They are immensely powerful, however, they did not have any part in the making of existence, other than creating Chaos. They inspire fear and hate even into the most strong-willed man. They were banished when a sovereign who reigned during the period of the True Empire sacrificed himself to the Gods and turned himself into six horns; three Loudhorns and three Quiethorns."

"What are the Quiethorns?" Inquired Bronar.

"They are like the Loudhorns, however, they summon the three Light Demons: Nell, Ell and Bell. If there is any entity that can best the Dark Demons then it is the Light Demons. Physical embodiments of the Gods, they are. Manifested from love and hope, they thwart evil." Said Zilnee.

"Why don't we find these Quiethorns and call upon these Light Demons?" Proposed Bronar.

Kashagara responded. "For two reason. The first one being that they will cleanse all evil. So that means that they will eradicate every single being, due to the fact that they have committed some sort of sin. The only person that would probably be spared would be my goody two-shoes brother over there." He indicated Zilnee.

"Hey." Zilnee said undignified. "I have killed thousands of people."

"Yes. But that was because it was needed or was an act of self-defence." Retorted Kashagara. "Anyway, let's get back on topic. The second reason why we cannot summon them is because the three Quiethorns are missing somewhere."

"Do you know where?"

"Boy! If I knew where they were then I wouldn't have said that they were missing!" He yelled.

"Brother, do you remember the Prophecy of Armageddon?"

"Yes." Replied Kashagara. "But what does that have to do with the Quiethorns?"

"It says that at the End of Time six demons shall rise from the water to do battle. They will flatten mountains and raise new ones from the ground. They will shift the direction of lakes and burn plains of grass." Zilnee told him.

"But how can we be sure that the six demons are the Dark and Light ones?"

"We can't." Answered the High Druid. "However, there is a chance."

Malfa, who had been quite for a while, felt his stomach rumble loudly. Nervously, he asked for some food.
Pg 40 Stranger Prince

"Of course! Of course." Said Kashagara, standing up. "Stay here. I'll go and make you something to eat."

Kashagara disappeared into the kitchen. Everything was silent, other than the roaring fire and the sound of Kashagara searching for a tray and some plates.

A few minutes later, Kashagara entered the room carrying a serving dish covered with pewter mugs, plates and cutlery, along with some hard bread, a lump of cheese and a jug of wine. "I hope that you're not too young to have a drink. I normally use the well water for my plants."

Malfa didn't reply and he, Bronar and Zilnee began to devour the food ravenously. After they had finished munching through their small meal, they turned their attention towards the wine. They filled up their cups twice before Zilnee charmed the plates to float into the kitchen.

"So, what are we supposed to do?" Malfa enquired after he had finished feasting.

Zilnee looked at him. "Well, I think that we might need to find the pieces of the Loudhorns and destroy them."

"How do you do that?" Bronar asked.

"Many things can destroy them." Said Kashagara. "However, they automatically repair themselves. What you would need to do to permanently demolish them would be to place them in a furnace located in Tirn'an-Losgh, the Last Great City of the Elves."

"Why could we not just throw the parts into a volcano then?"

"Because it's not heat you need, it's the power infused into the furnace that would obliterate it." Responded the High Druid.

"What is the White Table?" Asked Malfa.

Kashagara was about to reply when there was a faint exploding sound. The whole mountain shook. A trickle of dust fell from the roof.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Exclaimed Bronar, jumping to his feet.

Malfa ran to the window and looked out. A crack was forming on the wall. There was another bang and Malfa fell backwards. Two thick crevices had appeared on the cave wall. A huge boulder came crashing down, striking the ground with immense force. The house shook as smoke and powder billowed up into the air.

"Something's trying to get in." Coughed Kashagara, covering his mouth as the dirt surrounded his home.

"It's a dragon!" Yelled Malfa.

"What is wrong with you, boy? Are you insane?" Shouted Kashagara, watching some dust float into the room. "Dragons, in my cave?"

Suddenly, a whole side of the cave collapsed and a red, winged figure, with dangerous-looking spikes, flew through. It soared up to the roof and looked at the house. It growled and spat a stream of fire at the granite dwelling.

"By the Gods! Dragons! In my cave!" Hollered Kashagara, charging into a cupboard.
Pg 41 Dragons, In my Cave?

He pulled out an old broom, matted with dirt and hair. He tossed it to the floor, drew a stick from his robe pocket and shouted. "Soarenio!"

He grabbed the broomstick and ran out of the house with Malfa, Bronar and Zilnee following him. He rested the broom by the door and got his breath back.

"What are you doing?" Malfa demanded to know. "There is a dragon trying to ransack your home and burn us to a cinder and you're trying to do some spring cleaning!"

The old wizard ignored him and sat on the broomstick. He blasted the door off of its hinges and kicked off. He flew into the air, chasing the flying lizard.

Just as the dragon was going to attempt to hit the house again, Kashagara dashed over beside it and cast a spell at it. "Cinderio!"

An orange light streamed towards the creature and hit it in it's spiked tail. The animal shrieked and batted Kashagara away with its appendage. He screamed and spiralled towards the ground. Malfa expected to hear a thud, but there was none.

Zilnee, his face speckled with tears, whipped out his staff and sprinted out into the garden. He waited for the dragon to come into view. When it did, he held up his staff and shouted. "Electrize!"

A blue light burst from the tip of his staff and blasted towards the beast. It hit it in the stomach and it froze. For a second, the skeleton of the dragon became evident. An acrid smell emitted from the howling dragon.

Zilnee ran out of the garden, firing more spells at the lizard. "Cinderio! Hydrax! Windenio!"

The dragon flapped away from Zilnee, flying out of his range. It drew itself to full height and opened its mouth. There was a noise like a cannon going off and seven strips of flame; orange, yellow and red, sped towards the High Druid. Zilnee rolled over, however, the hem of his robe caught fire and he gasped.

Too preoccupied with trying to extinguish his clothes, Zilnee didn't see the dragon dive towards him. When he looked up he was horrified. The dragon's scaly face, coated with green blood, snarled at him. It lunged for him, endeavouring to take a bite. The High Druid jumped to his side just in time, but his robe snagged on a rock.

He tried to wriggle free as the creature advanced. It was just about to finish its prey when Kashagara, who had used a charm to break his fall, flew over it, hitting it with a spell. The dragon snapped at his broomstick, on which he was flying low, before returning to finish off Zilnee.

Out of nowhere, Bronar came running at the fiend, a sword in his hand. He swiped at the dragon, puncturing one of its many scales. He slashed at it again, attracting the annoyed beasts attention. The dragon belched some smoke at Bronar, temporarily blinding him.

The distraction was enough for Zilnee to get away from the dragon. "Bronar! Run!" He commanded.

Pg 42 Stranger Prince

Bronar did not need to be told twice. He sheathed his weapon and began running back towards the home, which was 50 metres away. The dragon fired some flames at the fleeing Giant-man. The fire licked his back but he was undeterred. Bronar was almost at the garden fence when the animal, enraged by a hex aimed at it by Kashagara, knocked him over with its head.

Bronar went tumbling into the wall, smashing his back off of the stone. He cartwheeled over it and struck his head off of a gravestone. Blood poured steadily from his head and he fell unconscious. The dragon stalked towards him, sneezing small bursts of fire from its nostrils.

It was just about to chew him up, however, something caught its eye. Malfa, who was standing at the door, chalk white with terror had came into the dragons sight. It roared with pleasure; it had just located its prey. It pushed Bronar aside, sending him into a bush of thorns, and leapt at the house. Its jaws bit at the doorway, chewing it up. Malfa backed off and began to run up the stairs.

The dragon began to crawl up the wall, smashing great chunks from it as it climbed higher. It cracked open a large piece of granite and tried to wriggle through. Malfa grabbed his sword and started to stab at the lizard before it broke through and devoured him. With its claws, the dragon began to tear through the wall, making a hole big enough for it to squeeze through. It pushed itself through and attempted to swipe at Malfa, who backed into a corner.

The creature shattered the wall and jumped inside. It cracked a desk in two, sending splinters everywhere. It spotted Malfa and ran at him, demolishing rooms and furniture. Malfa darted into one of the bedrooms and took refuge behind a closet. The dragon bounded in, destroying the plant pots that were lined precariously along a table.

It began ripping down the room, biting and scratching. Wood and stonework flew around the room, puncturing the room with little pinprick-sized holes. It snaked along the floor and tore the cupboard apart. Malfa stared defiantly at the dragon that had a jubilant glint in its eye. It raised its head and sprayed out fire.

Malfa lifted his sword, just as the flames hit him. He winced in pain but held his sword firmly. Instead of melting or sending fire ubiquitously, the sword was absorbing the fire. The dragon screeched and sent more flames at Malfa. The hilt of Malfa's sword grew progressively hotter and warmer, slightly burning his hands. The beast, confused at why its deadliest weapon was not working, paused for a moment. That was when Malfa chose to strike.

He pushed the sword above him and arced downwards with it. It lit up with a red hue and fire gushed from it. The fire hit the dragon and shoved it back. The creature squealed and retreated, however, Malfa went after it, flames still emitting from his sword. The dragon scampered away and fluttered its wings, taking off. Malfa pursued it until it was too high up for him to do any damage to it.

Kashagara, still on his broom, started to bombard it with yet more curses. The dragon, not wanting to flee without enacting revenge, changed its course and flew at the wizard. Kashagara, who was taken on unawares, didn't have time to get out of the way, they were surely going to fly into each other.

Then, out of nowhere, an arrow came sailing into the sky and thumped the dragon, directly on its head. The creature stopped flapping almost instantly and dropped to the ground like a ton of bricks. There was an explosion and the dragon was engulfed in flames.
Pg 43 Dragons, In my Cave?

The arrow had struck the dragon just under its weakened horn and it had flew off, impaling Kashagara in the chest. He grimaced and spiralled to the ground. He collapsed in a groaning heap while his broomstick crashed into a bush.

A girl, no older than fifteen and wearing leather armour, ran towards the old man shouting. "Father! Father!"

She dropped her bow and quiver beside the dying wizard and began rummaging through her pouch for some healing powder. "Help! Somebody help!"

Zilnee, carrying an injured Bronar, came running. "What is it?"

The girl pointed at Kashagara.

Zilnee placed Bronar on the ground and knelt beside his brother. "Hold on! It'll be okay!"

Kashagara smiled. "You were always an optimist." He coughed violently. "I believe that my time's up."

"Don't say that, father!" Said the girl, sobbing heavily.

Kashagara wiped her face. "You are kind. You can go it alone."

"She won't have to. Hold still." Demanded the High Druid shakily.

"Brother, you cannot save me. It is written that I am to die after a great battle."

"Well it isn't this one." Zilnee grabbed the bloodied horn and pulled it from Kashagara's body.

Kashagara yelled in pain and convulsed. Tears streamed down from the girls eyes, cascading onto the grass.

"Hold still!" Commanded Zilnee, putting his hands over Kashagara's deep wound.

Malfa hobbled over. His legs were gushing blood like a fountain. "What's wrong?"

"Kashagara's been speared with one of the dragon's horns. I'm attempting to heal him."

The High Druid touched his brother's wound and a white light blasted from his hands. A thin gel formed over his stomach, patching up his injury. Once it had covered his whole torso, it glowed in a gold light and vanished. It looked as if he had never been damaged in anyway.

"Take him in. I'll finish healing Bronar." Said Zilnee.

Malfa and the girl lifted Kashagara into the house and placed him on a couch in the living room. Malfa went into the kitchen to make something to drink while the girl sat beside Kashagara in a vigil.

Zilnee supported Bronar and walked him to the garden. He leaned him on the wall and hurried towards Kashagara, who was groaning and grunting. Zilnee glanced at the teenager.

"I heard you call him father. I didn't know that he even had a wife."

Pg 44 Stranger Prince

The girl laughed. "I'm not his real daughter. I was travelling with my family when some bandits attacked my caravan. They burnt it and killed the horse, stole our wares. They murdered my family and probably would have executed me, but Kashagara came. He was foraging for some ingredients to make a dangerous potion when he smelled burning. He ran to the forested patch of land that we were at and attacked the bandits. He adopted me and raised me as his own."

Bronar limped in. "Do you hear that?" He asked in response to hearing some raucous laughter.

The girl stood still. "I forgot!"

Zilnee faced her. "Forgot what?"

"There was something - I should say things - in the mountain. Hundreds of them!"

"Do you know what?" Asked Bronar, lifting up his sword.

"Goblins!"




































Pg 44 Out of the Graveyard…

Zilnee sprinted over to the window. The cave was the same. The smouldering corpse of the dragon lay on top of a pile of mud, smoking profusely, and the hole, tucked away in the left corner of the cavern about twenty metres above the earth, and was shrouded from sight by a great mound of rubble.

Barely, the faint sound of hundreds of footsteps echoing throughout the mountain could be heard. The raucous laughter of the goblins could also be perceived.

"There must be thousands of them running through the passageways. My brother's guardians will never be able to hold them off." Exclaimed Zilnee, grabbing his staff. He began to mutter some protective enchantments.

He opened the window and murmured. "Shieldio! Shieldio! Shieldio!"

Bright blue orbs sprang from his staff and climbed into the air. They hit an invisible boundary and turned yellow. There was a vague bang and they disappeared; in their place was a large semi-circle covering the house and the garden.

"That should keep them out." Said Zilnee, turning to face his cohort.

Kashagara grunted and opened his eyes. "Erg…" He groaned. "What's happening?"

Malfa answered him. "There's a bunch of man-eating goblins in your cave."

"Ahh… That's nice." He mused, confused. "Wait! What did you just say?"

He sprang to his feet and immediately regretted it. He clutched his stomach and fell back onto the couch, none too gracefully.

"You're in no fit state to fight. I'll make sure that Malfa, Bronar and your daughter are evacuated."

"What? Don't tell me that we're not fighting!" Yelled Malfa as he gripped his sword.

Zilnee looked at Malfa with pity. "Why do you think they are coming here? It's certainly not to party with some old fogies like us." He said the last part jokingly.

"B-But I can't leave you. What if you both get killed?" Pleaded Malfa.

"Boy! It'll take more than a few hunched beasts who can't even tell a wand from a vial of explosive brew to defeat me!" Yelled Kashagara, who had finally managed to stand up and was leaning on Bronar for support. "Go!"

"Father, I'll defend you until my last breath!" Bellowed the girl, drawing her bow from her quiver.

Kashagara held her close, patting her on the head. They were roughly the same height. "Follow them. They'll need you. They're more important than an old duffer like me."

Zilnee, who had gone out into the garden to inspect their surroundings, came back into the sitting room. "The goblins are getting closer. Malfa, take your friend Bronar and Kashagara's daughter into the cellar. There will be an empty cabinet. Stand in front of it and say 'letherbefoo'. It should fill up magically. Take this bag and seize everything."
Pg 45 Stranger Prince

Malfa nodded and turned around, prepared to go into the basement, when Kashagara spoke. "After that, look for the brown wine keg. It's Elvish and is inscribed with intricate writing. Shove it out of the way and, under it, there should be a trapdoor. Open it and jump through. Niorlau shall guide you."

Malfa beckoned for Bronar and Niorlau to follow him and they entered the kitchen. A large steel stove, operated magically, was placed beside a fridge and a sink. It smelled of perfume and was cluttered with polished pots and pans.

They strode the whole length of the room and came to a walk-in closet. It was shabby and riddled with holes. Malfa creaked it open. Before he walked inside, he grabbed a box of matches from a marble-topped counter and ushered the other two people in. They walked down the steps to a subterranean vault, damp, dark and generally desolate.

Malfa struck the match off of the wall and it sparked. For a second, the light was dim, however, it soon lit up half of the room. Malfa quickly set a torch, which was hanging from a rack on the wall, on fire. The vault basement was wide with a low roof. Its bricked walls were streaked with grime and puddles, green with algae, lay on the floor. Three kegs of beer, ale and wine stood at the far side, beside the cabinet that Zilnee had told them about.

Malfa stood in front of it. "Letherbefoo!"

The shelves, which were bare moments ago, were swiftly loaded with piles of meat, fruit and vegetables. A few canisters of water and some Dragon Lager also materialized. Malfa opened the bag and began to pile it inside. Bronar began to shift the barrel out of the way.

Kashagara appeared at the doorway. "Hurry! I spotted some scouts at the opening!"

The house trembled terribly. Some dust fell from the roof. Outside the house, the goblins had managed to destroy Zilnee's magical shield.

"Brother! What's happening?" Asked Kashagara, running back into the living room.

"They've brought mages of their own!"

Bronar grunted. He and Niorlau had just managed to push the wine keg out of the way. In its place was an old, dusty trapdoor that had a bronze knocker. Bronar kneeled down and opened it while the house quiver once again.

"They're in! There are hundreds of them!" Zilnee yelled.

The sound of the goblins stampeding could be heard from inside the cellar. It sounded like they were swarming inside the walls. A disgusting stench, of burning goblin flesh, accrued in the air. There were screams and howls of pain.

"Quickly! Through the trapdoor!" Shouted Malfa, locking the entrance to the cellar.

Bronar heaved it open; just as a few goblins ran into the kitchen, smashing vases and clattering pots and pans together. Niorlau jumped in, taking the torch off of Malfa. Bronar, who wedged himself in between the sides, followed the girl.

"Hurry, you useless lump!" Bellowed Malfa as the goblins started to kick on the door.


Pg 47

One goblin started to hack at the wood, causing it to crack and bend. Malfa shoved Bronar's head through the hole and clambered down with not a moment to spare. The second he slammed the trapdoor above him closed, the goblins bashing at the door to the cellar broke through, yelling with joy. Their jubilation morphed into anger when they saw nothing, apart from the bare cabinet and the kegs.

The goblin in charge began to sniff around, as if trying to catch their scent. "They're in an underground tunnel!" He grunted, drawing his crudely made, iron blade. "Search for it!"

Upstairs, bordered by goblins and orks, were Zilnee and Kashagara, casting spells, hexes and jinxes at their many enemies. A goblin, which was kneeling behind a chair, fired an arrow towards them. It flew at the two brothers, piercing the air effortlessly.

Zilnee spotted it soaring his way and directed his staff at a table, which he levitated above him. The arrow punctured the wood with a thud, however it didn't smash through the wood. Kashagara blasted away some beasts and aimed his wand at the desk. He tapped it and it shot away, knocking over some goblins.

Two Goblin Shamans blew the door open and walked inside the room, firing spells at the to brothers. The spiritualists were using crooked, black staffs to channel their magic and wore a necklace of skulls to amplify the power of their jinxes. Zilnee spotted them and responded with a few spells of his own.

They dodged it and were charging a particularly nasty curse when Zilnee fired a chain of lighting their way. One Shaman was able to get out of the way, but its partner wasn't that lucky. The arc of lighting struck him in the stomach and he flew through the wall. The remaining on screamed and blasted a hole in the ceiling.

Zilnee saw that the roof was about to cave in and he thrust his staff up. He strained himself by generating an extremely powerful gravitational charm. He was left vulnerable and could barely defend himself with a minor fire spell. The goblin sage was about to finish him off when Kashagara killed the few goblins in his immediate vicinity and blasted the shaman away.

More orks, goblin-like creatures that have been transformed by rigorous magical acts enacted upon them, barged into the room, scattering some of the more timid goblins. One of them roared and began to jabber away in it's own language.

It was palpable that the goblins understood as they exploded as if rallied by what the orks had said. They surged forth, ignoring the jets of fire and water that Zilnee and Kashagara were directing at them. For every goblin that was killed by flame and water, another two replaced it.

Kashagara swirled his wand around, using the motions that you would use if you were mixing some ingredients together in a cauldron. A yellow light formed in front of him, dazing the army of goblins and orks scrambling over broken furniture. The light began to circulate, collecting dirt and dust. Slowly, it formed into a solider state. After a while, the outline of a face could be seen.

Suddenly, the dust and dirt disappeared, in it's place was a golden armoured man, wielding a silver sword. It lifted its rapier up into the sky. Brightness radiated from it and there was a boom. The light, glowing and blinding, cut through the room, setting wood alight and burning the cruel beasts swarming around inside it.

It walked slowly and calculatedly into the fray, unnerved by the metal smashing into its breastplate. It swiped its sword forward, cutting into a few unfortunate goblins. It twirled around, slicing through more. The golden figure began stabbing ferociously, ignoring the chops and hacks coming from the foes encircling it.

Unexpectedly, a black mace tore the figure in half. It exploded in a ball of light, making the goblins and orks unable to see. The wielder of the mace, a tall goblin with a threatening air about him, stepped into view. Repulsive and sadistic with a flat nose and pasty, green and brown skin, the goblin opened its mouth to speak, showing blackened, decaying teeth.

"Gurntel!" He yelled at Kashagara. "We cross paths again!"

"Zackarack!" Retorted the wizard. "I see in all these years you haven't shaved! Still as ugly as ever!"

Pg 48

The ugly lieutenant glared. "Gurntel, you must learn who to respect and who to scorn upon!" He threw his club to the floor and summoned a fireball, which he proceeded to toss at Kashagara.

Zilnee, who was fending off some goblins aiming to flank them, saw the flame with only seconds to spare. He batted it away with his staff, sending it flying towards the caster. Zackarack sidestepped it and fired another one at Kashagara. The wizard dived behind the leftovers of a small bookcase as the spell exploded inches beside him, scorching the floor and leaving an ugly, black mark.

Kashagara peeked over the cracked wood and saw Zackarack pressing forward towards him. He pointed his wand at the old, stone hearth and shifted it out of position. The wall fractured as the fireplace was dragged forcefully from its place. It teetered hazardously before toppling over. Zackarack stared at the falling fireplace in horror, before moving it out of the way with his hand. It landed with a crash, on top of a poor, squealing goblin.

Zackarack gazed at Kashagara with contempt. He cupped his hands and began to rub them together. Blue sparks shot from them and an orb, powerful and cold, formed in his hands. He opened them and let the ball float out.

The ball charged at the old man, hitting him in the stomach. Kashagara slammed into the wall, yelling in pain. He moaned and randomly whirled his wand. A gust of wind materialised from it and blew Zackarack across the room. Kashagara struggled to his feet and bellowed. "Shieldio!"

An invisible shield formed in front of him, preventing him from harm. Zackarack destroyed it like glass. Kashagara responded by morphing the shards into ravenous birds of prey, which he sent at the goblin deputy. The goblin turned the birds into air and raised his hand at the wizard. Tendrils of black shadow streamed from them, floating up into the air and circling the ceiling. Kashagara stared at the shadows, mouth agape in terror.

The darkness zoomed at Kashagara as he elevated his wand. Firing some sparks, the wand met the shadows. Flashes and flickers of light flew from it while the wizard struggled to hold onto it. With his hand twisting back, Kashagara knew that the wand would either snap or fall from his hand eventually.

Zackarack laughed. "Gurntel, ready to meet your maker?"

Under normal circumstances, Kashagara would have replied rudely, however, he remained focused. Against his will, Kashagara's knees slowly bent backwards. After a while, he was kneeling. If he didn't break the spell-line soon, then he would be dead.

Zilnee fired an explosive spell at a squad of orks, clad in old, dirty Elvish armour, shooting them through the wall. He surveyed his surroundings; the remaining enemies were retreating and dragging the wounded outside. He spotted Kashagara, who was slowly being raised into the air by the Dark spell fired at him by the goblin commander.

He turned his staff around and shouted. "Analari! Analari! Analari!"

Three streams of white light flew from the tip and charged into Zackarack's spell. Almost immediately, Kashagara dropped to the floor. The three lights merged together, becoming stronger in unity. At a snail's pace, the pure light repelled the tainted one and pushed it back.

Pg 49

Kashagara got to his feet and lifted his wand weakly. "Analari." He whispered, leaning on a broken table for support.

Another trio of light attacked the dark shadows, driving it back even more. Zackarack used his free hand to toss some more shadows into the mix. One small wisp hit a table lamp, filled with gas. It blew up, raining fire and glass at the three duellists.

Zilnee walked nearer to Kashagara and grabbed him by the arm. "Together!" His brother nodded in reply.

Zilnee thrust his staff forward, while Kashagara done the same with his wand. "Analari!"

An endless wave of light burst from the tips of both weapons. Zackarack, taken by surprise, jumped in fright, instantly halting his spell. He cast a flimsy shield charm, which was ripped in pieces. He threw more shadows, hoping to delay the inevitable.

A few rivers of light went above his head. He glanced up and batted them away with his arms. He turned around and ran through a hole in the wall, with the light chasing after him. One zoomed towards him and he took cover behind a gravestone. The light struck the stone and the goblin was shoved backwards. He rolled out of the garden and, without further hesitation, teleported away.

Kashagara coughed and collapsed in a heap. Zilnee dived down beside him, fearing the worst. He felt his brother's neck; there was a pulse. He laughed as Kashagara was merely sleeping.

Zilnee assessed the room. It was destroyed; there was a huge, gaping fissure in the wall, spilling in light. Furthermore, the fireplace was scattered around the place, as was the chairs, tables and bookcases. The house smelt of burning wood and parchment. He could taste the blood and sweat.

He trained his staff at the wall. "Restorio!" The chunks of granite missing from the wall were replaced.

He faced the part of the room where a hearth once stood. Small cracks and tears littered that part of the wall. "Mendio!"

"Mendio! Restorio! Fixio!" Piece by piece, the room was repaired. The burning books ceased burning and the tables and seats were mended.

He admired his handiwork before casting a detection spell. Nothing, other than Zilnee and Kashagara, inhabited the place. He wished that Malfa, Bronar and Niorlau were all right, however, he doubted that. With a tinge of dread, he went to inspect the kitchen. Every single piece of cutlery and utensil was strewn on the floor. The stove, which was usually spotless and clean, was scratched and speckled with dirt. The larder door was open and the tins and food inside were rolling on the floor. He walked over to the walk-in closet. It was smashed and the door was lying a few feet inside the cellar. His stomach sank.

*

Malfa panted as he ran. Sweat poured down his red face. He risked turning around. The group of goblins pursuing them were hot on their tails. An arrow flew from behind and bounced off of a stone pillar, dust trickling to the floor.

Pg 50

Malfa took a small dagger from his pocket and put it parallel to his leg. He looked back at his assailants once more and released it. It whizzed towards a goblin and hit it in the leg. The goblin screeched and fell to the cobbled ground. Malfa smiled at his success, but his grin was wiped off is face when another arrow rocketed over his head.

"Malfa, hurry! Through this door!" Shouted Bronar, who was a few metres ahead of him and barely discernible in the dimness.

The door led into an extensive, narrow corridor, lined with grimy suits of armour covered in cobwebs. Beside each suit was a torch, which magically lit up after someone ran by them. The walls were grey and Malfa soon noticed that they were crafted from skulls. Human skulls. This wasn't an escape route; this was a catacomb.

"Bronar! Did you notice that this is an underground grave? Look at the walls!" He yelled, listening for any sign of a ghost or zombie haunting this place.

Bronar stopped for a second, attempting to recuperate. "S-Skulls. Y-you don't t-think that there a-are any ghouls lingering h-here?" He panted, beginning to jog again.

Malfa ran beside him. From here he could see Niorlau, sprinting round a corner. She was fast. "Hopefully not." He said in a strained voice.

The goblins, used to relentless, cross-country marching, were catching up on Malfa and his giant-man friend. They turned round a corner and at the end of the passageway was a large, stone door. They ran towards it, however, to their dismay, there was no visible way of opening it.

"Now what do we do?" Yelled Niorlau, kicking the door angrily.

Malfa turned around and was horrified when he saw the goblins walking almost casually towards them, beating their warty hands with their clubs. "Well, well, well. What do we have here?"

Malfa drew his sword, ready to strike. "Hurry up and get that door open!"

"How?" Asked Bronar.

"I don't know! Beat it down with your hands if you have to!"

The goblins proceeded, laughing as they moved nearer and nearer to Malfa. One of them lunged at him, but he was prepared and jumped backwards. It advanced again, sneering and smirking, showing it's rotting fangs. Malfa swiped at it. The sword sliced through the air and clipped the goblin in the side.

The blade got through the weak chain mail and speared the beast. The goblin gasped and fell backwards, sword sticking out of its abdomen. Malfa wrenched the steel from the corpse.

"The same fate will happen to you if you don't leave. Now!" He threatened, jabbing his sword at the chief.

"Get him!" The group rushed forwards, taking Malfa by surprise.

A dagger came flying at him and he only managed to deflect it by brushing it away with his hand. He hopped to the left twice, ducking as a soldier came running at him. He kicked the goblin and it rolled to the ground, holding its stomach. Malfa grabbed it by its armour.
Pg 51

"Look!" Yelled Niorlau, examining the stone closely while Bronar watched Malfa hold the struggling goblin. "There's a runic inscription carved into the stonework. It's a spell."

"Can you read it?"

"Barely!" She replied to Bronar. "Erm… Karvon Sael Manderver Hexalshema Shaleman!"

Malfa punched the goblin in the face and then hurled it into the assembly of goblins. The goblins began to get up, just as Bronar and Niorlau opened the door. "Come on!"

Malfa didn't need to be told twice. Throwing some dust at the stumbling goblins, he ran into the door, which sealed behind him. He looked around. In front of him was a gigantic gap. He knelt down and crawled over to the edge. Below him, almost invisible due to the distance, was a huge slab of rock, a bridge.

"How on Cerceres are we going to get across?" He questioned.

Bronar, who was scrambling around on the floor, searching for a staircase or a ladder, had no answer. Suddenly, he caught sight of some dusty vines, carpeting the wall like some sort of leafy growth. He edged closer to them and pulled one of them. It was strong, tough enough to support him.

"What about those vines? They lead down to the slab!" He shouted.

Carefully, Niorlau crept towards the lianas. Placing her bow back into her quiver, she grabbed onto the leaves that Bronar had indicated. She tugged at them, daring them to tear, before jumping. She fell down a few metres before she slowed down enough to gradually abseil downwards.

"Its safe!" She informed them.

Malfa followed her, cautiously leaping at them. He encountered no problems, however, his sword hilt got caught in the vines. Bronar reached over and freed it.

"You go down ahead of me. I may rip the vines out of their roots." Malfa heeded his warning and hurriedly began to descend.

When Malfa and Niorlau past the halfway line, Bronar clutched the liana and followed them downwards. Every so often, he could hear a snapping noise as some of the weaker vines snapped under his weight. He was sweating terribly; he didn't want to die.

"Are you alright up there?" Yelled Malfa.

"Yes! I'm fine." He replied, his unsteady voice betraying him.

He groped around for another vine and was shocked when his hand connected with something made of wood. There was a loud click and then a deafening grounding noise. The roof rumbled and his grip loosened.


Pg 52 …And into the Forest.

Time froze as Bronar fell backwards. Malfa looked up and to his horror he saw his friend tumble. Bronar bounced off of the wall, wincing in pain, and grabbed at one of the vines. It drooped, but it didn't rip. While this was happening, a huge chunk of stone plummeted from the roof, hitting the ground forcefully.

Malfa and Niorlau flew to the ground as the aftershock caused yet more rock to fall. Bronar clung on to the leaves like a limpet. At a snails pace, he lowered himself down. Malfa covered his mouth as dust circulated throughout the cave. Suddenly, the ground at the far end of the cavern slipped through a crack and lava bubbled up.

"There's lava!" Bellowed Bronar, pointing at the orange liquid.

Niorlau looked at the pool of molten rock in fear. It was rising rapidly and coming their way. "What shall we do?" She shouted in despair.

Malfa disregarded her outburst as he was staring at Bronar. Hidden underneath the vines, out of sight, where some wooden levers.

"Bronar! Try and hit that wooden stick-like thing with your boot!"

Bronar obliged and there was another rumble. Hundreds of rocks rained down from the ceiling. Niorlau almost fell off of the rock she was standing on, however, Malfa grabbed her. Bronar jumped the last few metres to the ground.

"Quick! We need to reach that shaft of light before we are suffocated beneath tonnes of rock!" He hollered.

Hastily, they jumped onto the next rock with not a minute to spare as it abruptly sank into the ground to be swallowed by magma. For ten minutes, they played a giant-sized game of stepping-stones with a twist; they also had to watch out for the stone showering from above, some of which could flatten a house.

Every time they leapt off a slab it would fall and another rock would take its place. Somehow, the goblins had found another route into the cave and were firing arrow after arrow at them. There were over ten of them and it did not matter whether they lived or died. One of the spell-casters was grabbing boulders before they struck the goblins and hurling them towards the three absconders.

Three goblins, each wielding rusting swords coated in poison, had caught up with them, halting Malfa, Bronar and Niorlau in their tracks. Each time one pounced at Malfa, Bronar would hack at it with his sword, causing the goblin to change the course of its sword or risk death. Meanwhile, Niorlau was responding to the archers by shooting them with her own arrows.

The rock that they were currently standing on began to shake and Malfa and Bronar dived to the one that Niorlau was on. The intrepid goblins tried to jump over the gap. Two of them failed and fell down into the dark abyss, nevertheless, one managed to make it. It clambered to its feet and glared at the three companions.
The goblin, which was clad in black iron and had a Ragged Blade, thrust its sword at Niorlau who rolled out of the way. Malfa ran at the goblin and cut through the armour. The beast was enraged and picked up Malfa by the throat. He tightened his grip and, sitting on in the mans face, threw him off of the rock.
Pg 53

Bronar barely managed to grab Malfa's sweaty hand to stop him falling into the chasm below. Malfa let out a sigh of relief as he dangled above the blackness of death. Niorlau saw the goblin charge at Bronar, trying to hit two birds with one stone, and reacted by hitting him in the shin with a carefully placed arrow.

The goblin's eyes opened wide in pain and it staggered. Niorlau stabbed her curved dagger into its spine and the goblin fell to the floor, dead as dead can be. Bronar successfully hoisted Malfa onto the rock. Malfa lay on the stone, ignoring the projectiles missing him by mere inches. The goblin archers paused for a second to take aim. They pulled back their bowstrings and where just about to fire when a huge rock flattened them.

The remaining goblins dropped their weapons and ran, squealing as they went. Malfa yawned. He hadn't slept for two days and he was exhausted. He had also been sprinting continuously for ten minutes and climbed down a carpet of liana. He stood up and limped onto the next rock. He had noticed that stuff had stopped falling for the moment.

Bronar and Niorlau were already standing in the ray of light, waiting for him. Beside them stood a rickety ladder, leading up to freedom. For the first time in days Malfa smiled, one turbulent chapter of his life had ended and a new one was about to begin.

*

"You imbecile! You fool!" Screamed Tobil, his voice raised and his hands wrapped around Zackarack's throat.

He smiled pleasurably as he tautened his hold. Zackarack garbled an apology and convulsed. His hand shook madly, trying desperately to push Tobil away.

"What was that?" Mocked Tobil. "You will not fail again? Well of course not! Or I'll have your head! Now leave me!"

He dropped Zackarack to the floor and turned away. Zackarack nursed his neck and gave Tobil one last, contempt-filled look and walked out of the room undignified.

"Master, the mission was not a total failure." Said Tobil to thin air. "They found out that Malfa is now in Carnihex. He must be heading for Drooding along with his friends."

"Excellent!" Exclaimed a dark, cold voice coming from the shadows. "Ready your army!"

"Certainly, however, it may be best if we "disable" Fort Major. Remove it from the fight, if you know what I mean." Cackled Tobil.

The voice laughed. "Yes! That would be fun!"

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Aug 23, 2011 2:14 pm 
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And the start of my Encyclopaedia:

Spoiler:
Novel Encyclopaedia

Races
Places, Lakes, Mountains & More
Culture & Habits
Notable People
Wars & Battles
Armies & Navies
Armour & Weapons
Legendary Ships & Other Transport
Famous Dates & Ages
Technology
Magic
Religion

Races

Key: * = Extinct
+ = Sub-species
? = Unknown

The Planet of Cerceres is a huge, enormous expanse of sea and land, filled with vibrant forests, treacherous mountains and dying deserts. Each of these terrains is populated by a vast array of races.

Ancient Races:

Essence Orbs (Essencious Creatuild)? -

Although not normally regarded as a race, these illusive orbs are among the most intelligent and advanced beings, capable of even creating life themselves. It is unknown how they came into being, only that they are. It is thought that they were almost universal during the Age of Myth; however, over time their power, or at least their numbers, has begun to wane and decay.

It remains mysterious on how they reproduce. That is if they do reproduce or simply become via some sort of manifestation. Also, it has been recorded that when they "die", a glowing blue residue is left. This deposit, known as Essence, is frequently used in the manufacturing of magical siege engines, but the number of Essence is rapidly in decline.

Mythics (Precedes Mythi)? -

Cultured and proud, the Mythics are revered by most Elven species as being the epitome of evolution. Tall, thin and gold-skinned, the Mythics could produce gigantic cities effortlessly and possessed the technology required to make mountains. The Menol mountain range is believed to have been created by them and the Wolven Ford is thought to be an extremely long canal.

Evolved from demons, an enemy that they despise, the Mythics were also known for their fiery temper and merciless attitude that they exhibited during battles. Their only allies were the Guardian Eagles, the only race near enough to them technology-wise.

It is hypothesised that they were made extinct after their defeat at the Battle of Kha'zixr, however, some may have fled to the mountains and devolved into the Wanderers. It is hard to pinpoint their fabled capital of Adasurc, though its ruins are said to be located in Mithraleen.

Wanderers (Homelve Wanderous)* -

Muscled and strong, these early, nomadic humans roamed the hills and grasslands of Cerceres for thousands of years, setting up camps in which they resided in for a few months before moving again. Quite bulky with a squat nose and rounded cheeks, the Wanderers were physically formidable. They had a slightly elongated skull and had a smaller brain.

It is known that the Wanderers - Homelve Wanderous in a scientific tongue - had at least one permanent city, built on the Elven Island Gad-Ederer. The Wanderers evolutionary path is unclear to all but the most enlightened historians. It is widely acknowledged that they evolved in more than a few different places, turning into more than a few different races.

Elves:

Mystic Elves (Mystique Elve)+ -

Mystic Elves are beautiful and graceful, dressed in the finest silk and covered in the finest golden jewellery. They are the most vain of the Elves and try to mimic the appearance of the Mythics. They regard most humans as weak and inferior and see Dwarves as ugly brutes.

Skilled in combat, most choose to wield long, silver swords with handcrafted gold hilts. They make good archers and are only rivalled in magic by the Essence Elves and some humans. Due to their closeness to the sea, Mystic Elves make good seamen, however, they may become uncomfortable during long sea voyages.

They reside in cities near the sea in tropical areas. There settlements are renowned for their beauty and for the fact that they are made of gold. In there culture, half-Elves are scorned upon and viewed as lesser beings, even being placed under humans and Dwarves. Very few non-Elves have official positions in the Government; the most notable one to be in it is probably High Druid Zilnee, who was elected as the High Council Magister.

Forest Elves (Bos Elve)+ -

By far the most common of the Elves, Forest Elves inhabit, as the name says, forests. Adept in magic and archery, they make talented warriors, as well as excellent smiths. They are more accepting of humans and, to some extent, Dwarves. Even though they still perceive them as less significant, they integrate half-Elves into their society more readily than others. The most famous kingdom of the Forest Elves is the Kingdom of Tir-volvic, found in Mithraleen.

Although they are slender and large, they are not weak. A Forest Elf can easily overpower a human. Mostly, they co-exist peacefully with other Elven races, however they despise the Mystic Elves. The hate was converted into violence when the Great Elven War began in 453 B.3.E (Before 3rd Empire). Most Forest Elves are employed in the Armed Forces or in blacksmiths, where their proficiency for crafting ornate swords are needed.

Essence Elves (Essencious Elve)+ -

Considered by many to be the best mages anywhere in the world, Essence Elves are normally found in Guild Halls, teaching magic, or in Castles, enlisted as the Castle Healer. To lots of people, Essence Elves are the only race to be feared by the Mystic Elves who, although they won't admit it, are unnerved by their amazing magical abilities.

It remains undiscovered over how they receive their magic powers, though most scholars put it down to the large amount of Essence mines near their cities. This is further supported by the fact that Essence Elves are normally worse at using magic if they are born and brought up outside an Essence Elf Kingdom.

These outsiders are called "nonun magi", which is translated into Lesser Magic. The nonun magi usually have to find more mundane work, as they cannot be employed for their spells. Despite the fact that they still can possess magical capacities, they are held in low esteem.

Arctic Elves (Icii Elve)+

As stubborn as they are cold, Arctic Elves occupy the most inhospitable regions of Cerceres, living in huge ice castles in the northern districts of the world. Good with a blade and ice magic, they are rarely seen outside their home countries. Arctic Elves have a ashy voice and are known to keep slaves.

They are the second strongest of the Elves, almost matching Dwarves in some regards. Most Arctic Elves hate sunlight as it irritates their skin, producing horrible rashes that can scar. Most Icii Elve found in other places only do night shifts, retreating to their homes at dawn. Due to the dislike that they reserve for Northern Dwarves, many wars have been started between them, each faction fighting to a standstill.

They are known to have racist tendencies and loathe non-Elves and non-Humans specifically. In recent times, the Mithraleen Empire has conquered their lands, attempting to reclaim old land. Most tribes are objected to this, however, one tribe, going by the name of Ulaalh, are hoping that if they are annexed into the Empir they will become more civilised.



Volcanic Elves (Firii Elve)+ -

Inhabiting the Southern Wastelands, Firii Elve are undoubtedly the toughest Elves. Capable of tossing boulders for metres, they make excellent masons. Standing at an impressive height of 7ft on average, very few races are taller than them. For centuries, they did not know of the Arctic Elves, however, they are sworn enemies.

Famed for their military prowess, and lack of magic (an odd attribute for an Elf), they are used as shock troops and "clean-up crews". They have befriended most Dwarves and happen to exist quite peacefully together, trading men for technology. They have an immunity to fire damage and have black skin. Their armour is also famous for its lightness and strength. They specialise in axes and hammers, using weaker soldiers as archers.

They are easily befriended and have a certain affinity for taming animals. Most of their mounts are reptiles and some are even dragons. They also have a special bond with the humans of Mithraleen and come when they most need it.

Half-elves:

Half-elves can be anything from an Elf-Elf union to a Dwarf-Elf union. They are scorned upon by most of their full-blooded brethren and are more humble due to it. Their humility makes them more accepted in human territory.

Menagi (Bosencious Elve)+ -

By far the most common of Half-elves, Menagi have naturally tattooed skin and are recognized as being attractive by all. They make good guards and servants and are generally found in non-Elf empires. Their pointy ears are less pronounced and their hair colour is not limited to blonde and black. They are the only Half-elves to own their own country, which is located on the island of Haver.

Benagi (Icfirii Elve)+ -

A rare Half-elf, the Benagi are the union of an Arctic Elf and a Volcanic Elf. Their pigment of their skin is an odd grey, which contrasts with their white hair. They are the most tolerable of elves as they can live in both hot and cold areas. Sightings of them are uncommon at best because they tend to steer clear of civilisation. They defend their homes vigorously, as proved at the Battle of the Cleman Forest, when a small force of five hundred obliterated the attacking human army of ten thousand.

Denagi (Bostique Elve)+ -

With numbers estimated at there only being one hundred in existence at one time, Denagi are shunned to the lowest levels of society, only being permitted in Dwarven culture. Despite being adroit at archery, swordsmanship and summoning, they are normally said to be unemployable, unless it is in a Dwarven Army. They band together on the Delasri mountain range, where the Eagles there take pity on them and protect them ferociously.

Men:

Hardeteels (Homo Shieldio) -

Flat-faced and ugly, Hardeteels can be found commonly working in the army or mining industry. Although their agriculture may be lacking, the Hardeteels make up for it by producing some of the finest weaponry known to man. They have a friendly rivalry with normal humans, competing to see who can capture the most land. They see the elves as snobs and the newer races of men as adolescents, believing that it is their duty to guide them.

Their army is among the best in the world and they have a fierce dislike for Dwarves, that fierceness some time manifesting into a battle. They were the first to tame and domesticate Nerans and use them for food and mounts. As well as training Nerans for combat, they were the creators of the first cannon, a title they dispute with the Dwarves.

They can date their origins back hundreds of thousands of years, directly to the Wanderers. They believe that they have found the altar where the Wanderers first made a connection with the Gods. The average Hardeteel is more religious than the average human, only being surpassed by Elves in terms of religiousness.

Nards (Homo Coldensio)+ -

Found in the icy mountains in the North, the Nards are less advanced than most. When the Hardeteels had discovered gunpowder for their cannons, the Nards had just learned to smelt iron and make steel. Their one city is small and on top of a mountain. The Dwarves seen to be keen on them and most of them take on Nards as strongmen for entertainment, where their musculature comes in handy.

To most of the world, they are unknown, only being found by a select few races. The arctic Elves regard them as vermin and take pleasure in hunting them. At first, the Nards had reacted furiously to this, amassing a small army and assaulting the Icii Elve capital city, however, they were beaten and would have been defeated, were it not for the timely arrival of the Dwarves. Unknowingly, they had sparked a war that would last for two hundred years.

Modern Humans (Homo Imperila)+ -

The Homo Imperila are a multi-cultural, diverse species. Being found across the globe in command of duchies, counties, states, countries, empires and kingdoms, they are feared, hated, loved and revered by many. Intrepid and bold, they have certainly made their mark on Cerceres, inspiring some with their brave deeds and disgusted by others for their flaws.

Skilled at all three areas of combat, magic, mêlée and archery, they are good at both defending and attacking. They are locked in never-ending hostilities with the Mystic Elves and the Enacra goblins. Their armour and weapons, although good, are mediocre compared to most others and their Battle-Mages are numerous but ordinary.

The most notable human empire is Mithraleen. As well as being the oldest, it is the most varied, being home to over ten different races. Mostly observed as rich, a lot of their people live in poverty and squalor, struggling to get jobs and food.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 5:46 pm 
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POMC S117 wrote:
It's like: "The king, who had ruled for 40 years, sat..."

But that's a weak sentence. I think I am misreading or missing a point, but don't forget there are other ways to work in that information. For instance:

The king, who had ruled for 40 years, sat at the table...

vs.

The king sat at the table, rubbing his forehead. Never in 40 years of his rule had he...

If that makes sense?


Also, don't double post, even in this thread. If you want to update us on your work, you are welcome to start a new thread just for yourself; or you can copy the information in one post, delete it, paste it, and add additional information so it appears as a new post. Tedious, but double posts clutter!

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 5:51 pm 
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Sorry. :(

And it was an example. I don't usually write like that.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Sat Aug 27, 2011 1:41 pm 
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Right, so I have come up with a new ieda for a Morrowind fan-fic story/book. I am actually heavily contemplating stopping the tale of Sylvanus Ingaredhel and working on this story instead. But ultimately I can't make up my mind. Would you rather read about an ex-convict turned of his thuggish ways who joins the Temple and becomes the Nerevarine, or about a warrior born Dunmer who becomes the Nerevarine, in which is included loads of Elder Scrolls Lore?

The story outline in my head thus far:
A proud, bold, and confident man, the Dunmer (as so far known, I have not a name for him yet) is an aspiring warrior, of strong mind and body. His rough and ready attitude has gotten him into more than one scuffle, but generally a well meaning, honest man, willing to admit his faults but to fight for his beliefs. Even as a very young boy he knew he would be a great warrior, just like his father was, who died in the Morrowind invasion (<-- doing research into this presently to get all the facts straight. current mindset is that the imperials came to Vvardenfell, war ensued, and the Dunmer boy and his mother are captured, his father was killing in the invasion, and are shipped, for whatever yet-to-be-determined reason, to live in Cyrodiil.) He never fit in with the other children, and always got into fights, usually started by the other party (though he tended to end them) usually because they would taunt him and jeer at him and his mother for being "foreigners". This continued his whole life (he came to really hate the Imperial city and longed to be back in his homeland of Morrowind), up until the point when some racist thugs killed his mother, for the same reason that she was an outsider and foreigner. The Dunmer hunted down and killed and her murderers, and, because the good never wins, he is imprisoned for his "crimes of retribution".
The rest of the story from this point forth is known to every one who has played Morrowind, so there is no need to elaborate on it. I have considered the idea of a prequel to the main story, in which is included all the above info, but this is still an idea in the working. A heck of a lot more research is required into Morrowind lore before i undertake this task at all.

So what do you think, ex-convict, or warrior Dunmer with lore?

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Mon Sep 05, 2011 9:35 am 
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So yeah this is called a prologue, though it's excessively vague.


Spoiler:
This is Nervell – a world where the four ruling countries are very divided, and one even has magic. The Northern Kingdom of Nervell – and all of its citizens - possess the power to bend reality itself. The Southern Kingdom has been at war with the North for over two centuries over magic. The people of the Southern Kingdom grow more desperate with each passing day as they realize they are losing the war… and desperate people sometimes do unthinkable things.


An old man sat on a large marble throne in a huge primitive throne room, but there was not another soul in the room except for a woman dressed in robes that gave her an otherworldly, yet peaceful appearance.

“Are you absolutely positive you wish to go through with the ritual?” The woman asked in her deep, soothing voice. The woman was speaking in the native language of the barren, desert Southern Kingdom.

“I am sure, Shaman. Do not question me again. Make Contact and get it over with.” The old man sitting on the throne bellowed angrily. When he was angry, his wrinkles got even deeper. It was clear he was scowling, even though his bushy gray beard concealed the lower part of his face. He sighed and swept a strand of gray hair behind his ear.

This man is known as Elijah Syriad, Ruler of the Southern Kingdom, King of the South. The two were in the royal palace of the South, which was located in the capitol oasis known as Arena.

“I apologize for my question, my lord. I just… I worry for your safety. Demons are not known to be reliable.” The Shaman said without making eye contact with King Elijah.

The Shaman was talking about real Demons – known to exist in Nervell. Demons are said to live in an alternate world called The Sorrows, and scarcely make contact with humans. The ritual to make contact with Demons is not a common one, guarded fiercely by all who know it. Although the number of times the Southern Kingdom has made contact with Demons can be counted on one hand, they still have a reputation of being evil, manipulative, and untrustworthy. Even so, when they promised something, they usually fulfilled it. The outcome just wouldn’t be the one you were expecting.

“I do not care for your concerns, Shaman. Do the Ritual. Summon a Demon to aid me. Aid us.” Elijah commanded. The shaman bowed reluctantly and began to mutter something in a strange language.

As the shaman was talking, a mist started to form around the throne room. At first it was subtle – but when the Shaman was done, Elijah couldn’t even see his hand in front of his face, the foggy cloud was so thick.

“It is done.” The Shaman said simply. “Make a contact and I will bring the Demon back to Nervell.”

Under normal circumstances, Elijah would have been worried when she said return “back” to Nervell, but he ignored her and stood up eagerly.

“I am addressing any Demon who wishes to make an alliance with a Human king.” Elijah started. He had planned this, and he felt that would gather attention. “I am Elijah Syriad of the Southern Kingdom of Nervell, and I wish –“

“I know what it is you wish.” A deep, grumbling voice echoed throughout the mist. Elijah made a small gasp but quickly regained his composure.

“You seek vengeance – no? To right those who have wronged your people? “ The voice continued. “You have a hunger within you, Old King. I can feel it. A hunger for magic, the magic of the Northern Kingdom. You lust for what which is not yours.”

“That is not true.” Elijah interrupted. “Magic rightfully belongs to the Southern Kingdom. I wouldn’t expect a Demon to understand, but –“

“Oh, but I do understand.” The demon growled. “Your people have held a grudge for two centuries – one that will not end until one side is dead. Your people had the power of magic in their grasp – but it was taken, nay, stolen from them, by the Northerners. Am I correct?” Elijah nodded numbly, unaware of how the Demon knew this.

“And now your people fight a losing war. You are their King, their provider, their protector… and you are failing your people, Lord Syriad.” Elijah winced as though he had been hit. “You are one in a long line of rulers, those before you have kept the tide of battle even. Now, because of you, your people may die.” Elijah winced again.

“So you turn to The Sorrows for help. To the demons for help. To me for help.” The voice growled. After a moment of silence, the voice snapped “Well? Is that not what you want? My aid in making your country win the war?”

Elijah nodded hastily. “Yes, yes of course! That is what I want!” He said eagerly.

“As I expected. So, Lord Syriad… what would you be willing to pay for my assistance?” The voice asked cautiously.

“Anything.” Elijah quickly said.

“Anything, you say? Well, then, I believe we have a partnership, you and I.” The voice growled, it seemed closer now, and louder.

“I don’t believe I have your name.” Elijah said, his voice wavering, trying to scan through the endless mist to see the demon.

“You may call me The Magister. But hush, now we have work to do.”

======================================

Meanwhile, in the Northern Kingdom…



The Northern Kingdom is known for its snowy landscape and cold climates. The capitol city of the North is called Borum, and it is in Borum that there lived a peculiar man. His magic seemed to be predicting the future.

See, it is truly “His magic”. For the people of The Northern Kingdom are not just generally magical, no, each citizen has a unique magical ability.

Now, back to the peculiar man, His name is not important – all that is relevant to know is that he could predict the future and his eyes – the color of which indicated a person’s magical power, I.E. someone who could produce flames, their eyes were red or orange – well, the peculiar man’s eyes were white, like a cloud. Fortune tellers, or Seers, are exceedingly rare in the Northern Kingdom and and are monitored constantly by the government, under the rule of the fair Queen Anne Sinclair.

One day, the man decided to go on a shopping trip to but milk. He went out to the market. It was snowing in Borum but the market was only a few minutes away, so he’d walk anyways. Just as he arrived to the large wooden building that was the market, he suddenly felt horrible. His entire body tensed up and he lost control of his movement. The man spun around the front of the market and started to spout gibberish. Just before he was tackled to the ground, he uttered nothing other than a prophecy.

It has happened,
The Great Convergence has begun.
Humans will kill humans,
And Demons will kill demons.
As the boundaries fade,
So do our hopes of survival.
Try as we might,
We cannot stop the Convergence!
But there are The Four
Earth, Fire, Water and Air!
Who will restore order
And end the Convergence
Or die trying.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Sep 06, 2011 3:58 am 
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Spoiler:
Massive spires poked and reached up out of the earth toward the ragged ceiling. Beyond, a large and round glass screen pulsed and popped with life. Its surface cast off images of people and places unknown. Children danced in green sunlit parks. Old men played board games around an ebony table. Mothers nurtured their babes. Fathers counseled their sons. The painted picture was beautiful. I had never seen such peace.
Near the bottom of the screen where the ground beneath sloped off into a dark pit, a familiar silhouette stared back at me. The closer I moved toward it, the clearer it became. My once young face had become wrinkled and scarred. Not with cuts or bruises, but with time. Within my tired baggy eyes, I could now see the same dazed look of the Outsiders.
The screen exploded with new life as I clutched at my pale form. My good hand scratched at my chin, brushed against my drooping nose, rubbed at the creases on my forehead. All while the screen spurted images of rot and decay. Men disemboweled each other on ancient battlefields. Fathers drunkenly beat their sons. Mothers calmly drowned their children. Brothers murdered brothers.
Every visible soul contained the same dark dispirited pupils as my own. These cruel visions danced around my reflected form. Then the flashes of pain ceased. A beautiful meadow gleamed in the sunrise. Dew on thousands of green blades sparkled. The grass let itself get dragged by the wind. A single white mare galloped across the field.
A chilling breeze permeated through the chamber. The pale blue sky darkened and then exploded in a brilliant burst. My retinas burned and my pupils contracted. My head flung to the side as my blinking eyes were seared by the nightmare. Thunder and lightning bellowed and sparked around my ears and through my fearful lids.
Clouds of cinder and ashes reached up toward the heavens. Charred filth and dust rained down from the hellish tempest. Blackened dirt and pools of boiling mud littered the once clean ground. A single large shadow lay burned into the rock and gravel. The devastation was absolute. Nothing within the nine levels of the Inferno could compare to the blazing conflagration here. Nothing ever built before by man proved to be so costly. Tears streamed down my dirty cheeks as I closed my eyes for sweet relief.


thoughts?


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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Sat Sep 24, 2011 1:59 pm 
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Okay, because Venger is unavailable at the moment he has asked me to write out the description of the pictures (the pictures of the forest) you saw in the other thread. Right. Read away.

Picture in your mind's eye, a forest, with a canopy of green leaves so beautifully thick and dense that even at high noon, not a ray of sunshine can penetrate its green shield, leaving the entire moss, leaf and rotten log strewn forest floor in deep, mysterious darkness. The only light amidst the giant, ancient trunks of the forest is the mystical glow cast by the dense growth of wide-leaf ferns, fleshy mushrooms and woody toadstools, with their glowing pods and shining leaves, and also the strange fireflies, an eery, yet beautiful orbs of white light, no larger than a robin's speckled egg, floating and bobbing amidst the flora and fauna.
Imagine in your mind's magical eye, the sounds of the forest and those that live in it. The gentle sigh and whoosh of trunk and leaf as the cool breeze rakes through the canopy, the angry buzzing and lazy humming of bees and pixies in their cozy nests, and the lonesome and fierce howls and growls of beasts unseen, both great and small, their eyes, as if they were glowing, peering out from under the twisted, dense folds of the thick undergrowth, and the gentle gurgle of a nearby stream as it winds and cuts its slippery way through the forest til it ends in a waterfall of low height, splashing into a pool filled with frogs with their deep, slow croaking upon large, flat, green lilies and white, aromatic flowers, and the playful plops and splashes of nymphs playing in the water.
Picture the animals that live in that forest. The bright, white, luminescent firefly orbs, randomly, yet numerously scattered silently amongst the ancient trees, the faeries with their small, slender, pale yet colorful, nude bodies, their wings beating so fast they cannot be seen, as they continue their nonstop chatter, traveling between their nests and the forest floor, collecting moss, lichen and leaves for their homes; the gnomes with their tall, brightly colored painted hats, dirty hands, round bellies and hairy faces, peering out of their burrows beneath large fleshy and woody luminescent mushrooms, talking in their squeaky, high-pitched voices.


So there you have it. I think there's suppose to be more written on it, since he put a coma, instead of a period, but that may have been a typo. So, in case you didn't know, this is to be the forest in our fearytale that we are working on. It's going to be great!
So any thoughts you have on it? Critiques? Anything?


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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 7:33 pm 
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I've got one.
Just a thought which came to me while staring at the clouds from above them. It looks very different when flying like that, if you're over water sometimes it looks like you're just looking up at the sky. Anyway, I'm drifting. I might do that a little, but please, bare with me. I just figured I might post this up here and see what you guys thought of it since quite a few of you seem to be writing some cool story or another. Well, here it goes.

We left the ground long ago for she no longer could sustain us, any more of our history on the ground was almost entirely lost along with those that walked it in those days. We have only myths and legends now, nothing more. We are of the sky now, and we rule its cold, stark beauty with modern engineering. We gather our power from our Sun and the Winds. We have been blessed with a peaceful existance for more years then anyone has cared to count, but as is always the case this was not meant to last. There are always those who take opportunity in the weak, but I have now discovered that our Guild has decieved us as well. It was told as a legend, how creatures of the ground could sometimes make their way into one of the lower, smaller villages. They were rumored to be the ones that were left behind, ones that had turned into beasts after years living on the dangerous ground. It's true. They came for my village, most were killed or taken below, but those of us that survived tried to figure out what to do next. Then they came, Guild members recruited to preserve the peace, with orders to kill all survivors. Myself and a few others fought back, and now we are in hiding. Our Guild that has led us since the beginning has been hiding the truth from us, we are going to find out why and how far this deception goes. Then we are going to fix, however we must.

Anyway, that's it. I just rewrote most of that from my original notes, which were made up of about ten sentences. I think I can make this work, I have another idea I have had that will fit perfectly with a few adjustments. This is somewhat of a steampunk type world, somewhat. It also has plenty of other genres you could put to it, but I've never been too fond of genres. Please tell me what you think of that little bit, and I'll try to add the next part I've got brewing next time. Thank you!

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2011 2:58 am 
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Unwritten (what a pun), I think that sounds interesting. You certainly hooked my interest about what is going on, which is half the battle. I would read more.

Steampunk is an interesting genre that I haven't much experience with, but the little I like is always fascinating. I say go for it!

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2011 4:02 am 
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I'm writing up an appendix on my own fantasy world. I shall post what I have when it's more complete.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 12:26 am 
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Don't mean to double post, but here's my appendix thus far.

Spoiler:
The world of Orliath is a fairly large-sized planet, about twice the size of earth. It contains 10 continents, 1 large island chain, and many smaller island chains. The planet is about 60% water, 40% land, and the climate is similar to earth, though not as hot.

No one knows how old Orliath itself is, but the first recorded writings of history by the sage Oldenhaller state the year being 'Year 0', and therefore, Orliathans gauge the years based on how many years since Oldenhaller recorded his books.

The first thing I'll be detailing are the several races of Orliath.

RACES

Humans - Humans on Orliath are quite similar to the humans of medival times on Earth. Extremely variable, there seems to be no way to truly define a human, other than the word 'versatile'. They are the primary inhabitants of Vendalior, the most populated and second largest nation on Orliath, and Cienia, the sworn enemy of Vendalior. They commonly live up to 70 years of age.

Elves - Elves are fair folk, similar in appearance to humans. Their hair colors range from the normal blonds and browns, to dark greens and blues. They are shorter in stature than humans, and also a bit more fragile. Their eyes are most commonly green, but brown eyes are also prevalent. A blue eyed elf is a rarity, but not unheard of. Elves also have pointed ears, which point either up, down, or to the side, depending on genetics.
Elves are very agile and are well suited to the pursuits of the rogue, though they are not unskilled in magic. The average front-line prowess of an elf leaves some to be desired, but an elf can develop himself if he truly wishes to become a front-line infantryman.
Elves are usually divided into two social groups. Elves from Tiranon are known as 'Low' elves (or 'Lesser') and are usually seen as lesser citizens, disrespectful, while Elves from Mythira are known as 'High' elves (or 'greater') and are usually considered upstanding citizens.
Elves are the primary residents of the Kingdom of Mythira and also a large part of the Republic of Tiranon. They usually live for approximately 500 years.

Dwarf - Short, stout, bearded folk hailing primarily from the Kingdom of Enzkaad. Their beards are the stuff of legend, and their prowess with the smithy is something to behold. They have a long history of civil wars, and there is rarely a time when the dwarves of the world are not fighting amongst themselves. They primarily inhabit Enzkaad, the trade nation Alehaven, and the currently split nation of Kazzadahn. Dwarves cannot use magic. Unlike what the wives' tales claim, dwarven women do exist, and they are aesthetically just small human women. Dwarves live for approximately 2000 years, and because of their long lifespan, they are the primary recorders of history.
Dwarves go through four distinct stages of life, in order;
-Groundling - Young Dwarves who learn about the world around them and find their future vocational skills.
-Earthbound - Adult Dwarves who do their jobs, using the skills they found as a Groundling.
-Patriarch/Matriarch - Middle aged dwarves who find a partner to have a child (or in rare cases, 2 children) with.
-Avatar - Old dwarves who serve as advisors and artisans who train apprentices.
Dwarven fertility rates are rather low. Most couples only have one child, but on some occasions, 2 children are had.

Dun'gar - The result of a dwarf and human union. Dun'gar are extremely hardy like their dwarven halves, but they retain the height of their human halves, making them known as 'tall dwarves' amongst those not of their race. They are usually lacking in intelligence but are immensely powerful, often making them figurative walking fortresses on the battlefield. They are the least common race on Orliath, and the majority of them are found in Alehaven.
They cannot use magic, are sterile, and live for about 100 years.

Gnomes - Closely related cousins of the dwarves, the Gnomes of Orliath are an extremely quirky and excitable race; they commonly seem to be having constant sugar rushes. This leads to them having very quick hands, and as such they are the head pioneers of technology on the planet. They are also extremely adept at magic, particularly that of the electric sort. They are, however, highly ineffective at close combat due to their diminutive nature (2 1/2-3 feet tall). Their most notable feature is their extremely vivid hair, with colors ranging from bright blue to hot pink. They primarily inhabit Alehaven and Deralla. They have extremely quick minds, but this comes at the price of a relatively short lifespan. Gnomes beyond 40 years of age are a rarity.

Avians - The rare birdlike people hailing from the Hallun islands. Their faces are similar to humans except for the beaks protruding from their faces, and they have wings on their arms to allow gliding, though not true flight. They are highly uncivilized and are very rarely seen in large cities, preferring to stick to tribes on the islands. When they do go to larger cities, they are often socially awkward and prefer to keep to themselves, and they are often discriminated for their odd appearance. They commonly employ their flight skills in their fighting, and specialize with bows. They are one of the few races that are unable to use magic.
They are found almost exclusively on the Hallun islands. Their lifespans are largely unknown.

Eldavir - The result of a human-elf union. They are generally the most attractive race on Orliath, combining the good looks of both of their halves, thus making them excel at diplomatic and mercantile arts. They are also more physically proficient than their elven ancestors, making them capable fighters, though their unnatural perception combined with their un-elven strength makes them the finest archers on all of Orliath. Their magic abilities are much weaker than a normal elf, and they often do not use it at all.
Eldavirs are commonly found in Vendalior and Tiranon. They inherit their Elven parents' longevity, and live for around 500 years.

Virfen - The result of a dwarf-gnome union. They are slightly bigger than average gnomes; in fact, they are almost identical to their dwarven halves, with the exception of higher intelligence, lower strength, and shorter beards. They are capable of very limited magic, and have no real hope of becoming mages. Their hair colors are extremely vivid like their gnome ancestors, though to a lesser degree.
They do not often leave New Kazzadahn or Feinkrag, the two warring dwarven territories. They live for about 100 years, and are sterile.

(Note; unions between elves and dwarves, and gnomes and any other race other than dwarves, are biologically impossible.)

Now, the nations of Orliath.

NATIONS

Unlike on earth, where several nations can be found occupying the same continent, Orliathan continents usually belong to one nation only, unless a war is being fought over said continent.

1 - The Kingdom of Vendalior; A dictatorship under the guise of a monarchy. It is run by a single figurehead (King) and a council of advisors that have limited power. The nobles of Vendalior are often extremely wealthy in comparison to the nobles of other nations, and their peasants are often poor in the same extreme. The nation is practically divided between the poor and the rich, and the commoners often instigate riots, though such uprisings rarely last for long. The nation's population contains every race on Orliath, though humans are dominant.
The current king of Vendalior is Lexaeus Vendal IV, the brother of the late former king Stanislaus Vendal. A known war hero, Lexaeus was a prominent in the great Vendalian civil war, and took the throne in the midst of the conflict after the mysterious death of his brother. He is a firm believer of Human supremacy and generally detests other races, though like a true politician, he hides this well.

2 - Tiranian Republic (Tiranon) - A former province of Mythira, the elven kingdom, that succeeded peacefully after a political disagreement. Though it is the largest nation on Orliath, it has one of the smallest populations due to its' cold, icy climate (in fact, only 10% of Tiranon's land is inhabited.) It contains many port towns and is a fairly successful trading nation, and it's navy is a force to be reckoned with. Tiranon is a primarily elven nation, though Eldavir are somewhat prominent, as are humans.
Tiranon is ruled by a five-man Council of 'Elders'. The head Elder, Earandur Arthanu, is a kind and compassionate man, though his philanthropic methods are often defeated by the rest of the council. He is primarily politically supported by fellow Elder, Chiraz Alturas, the youngest Elder in Tiranian history.

3 - Kingdom of Cienia - A relatively small nation with a large population, Cienia's political stability is it's most renowned feature, having retained the same ruling family since its' founding. The nobles of the nation are often weak, and the commoner group of people often live much better than those in other nations. Their primary exports include many fine luxuries such as sugars, spices, and wines. The royal family also has a secret sect of assassins that help to secure the royal line's supremacy, and to infiltrate enemy nations and take down highly important targets. The kingdom's longstanding feud with Vendalior has done naught to diminish the nation's economic success. The nation is known for being the only one on Orliath to have maintained a single royal line. Cienia is occupied mostly by Eldavir, though elves and humans also claim Cienia as their home. The nation is ran by a single monarch, with a board of 'Judge Magisters' under her authority. The leader of the board of Magisters is known as the 'Supreme Judge Magister'.
The current ruler is Queen Ciela XVIII, a smart Eldavir ruler with a great mind for economics. She commonly favors the common folk, for she believes them to be the true backbone of the nation's success.

4 - The Derallan Magocracy (Deralla) - A nation which houses the mage's guild, the group that controls the use of magic upon Orliath. The nation is ruled by a council of 12 elected arch-mages of equal power. The nation is often reclusive to others, but they keep their borders open for trading and those looking to train as mages. Deralla is primarily inhabited by Humans, Elves, and Gnomes.
The eldest mage on the High Council, Archmage Cullnir, has lived for an unnaturally long amount of time, and though it is often not questioned, his method of unnaturally long lifespan is currently unknown.

5 - Feinkrag Territory - One of the two warring Dwarven territories upon the former nation of Kazzadahn. After Kazzadahn's Regent proved to be corrupt, the resulting uprising led to yet another Dwarven Civil war. The haters of the regent formed Feinkrag and waged war against New Kazzadahn, the opposing territory. The Feinkrag side of the conflict has a larger Virfen/gnome population than New Kazzadahn, but is still dominantly dwarven.
The ruler of the Territory is Algrim Feinkrag, who took the initiative to start the rebellion with his sons, naming the new territory after himself.

6 - New Kazzadahn - The other side of the Kazzadahn civil war. The supporters of the former regent stood by him as the rest of the nation formed Feinkrag, and they formed the new territory of New Kazzadahn. New Kazzadahn is almost exclusively dwarven, but other races are known to be there as well.
The former regent, Gadrin Kurgan, is the leader of the territory, and wants to restore himself to power and prove himself to be a worthy leader.

7 - Enzkaad - The capital nation of the Dwarven race, Enzkaad is a rocky, cold nation with the largest Dwarven population of any nation on Orliath. The inhabitants live inside the mountains of the nation, surrounding huge furnaces that warm the dwarves from the intense cold of the outside. The nation is inhabited by Dwarves, Virfen, Gnomes, and a small amount of Dun'Gar.

8 - Hallun Islands - A mysterious, largely unexplored chain of islands that is home to the Avian people. There is no true form of government on the islands, as the Avians often live in reclusive, hostile tribes. Not much else is known about the Hallun Islands.

9 - Mythira - The Elven Capital on Orliath, ruled by King Athiran and Queen Zyneste. The elves of Mythira are very attuned to nature and build their homes out of the gigantic trees that dot the continent. The nation is reclusive much like Deralla, but to a greater degree, trading only with Tiranon and it's territory, Elzirath. Mythira is nearly exclusively inhabited by Elves, shunning other races (especially Eldavir, whose elven parents are considered blasphemers against their own race.)
King Athiran and Queen Zyneste are very coordinated rulers and employ a tough justice system to maintain fierce order, leading to an extremely low criminal rate. Their rule also encourages self-sufficiency as to incerase isolation from other nations.

10 - Elzirath - A territory owned by Mythira. Much like Mythira, it is nearly exclusively elven in population. It is ruled indirectly by the King and Queen in Mythira, through several regents that rule several settlements. The tree-based architecture of Mythira is the same in Elzirath.

11 - Alehaven - The economic capital of Orliath, and a territory of Enzkaad. People from all over Orliath come to Alehaven to peddle their wares, and as such, the population is very diverse, though the primary inhabitants are Virfen, Dun'gar, Dwarves, and Gnomes. As its' name implies, it is a large producer of beer and ale, and taverns dot the cities.
The regent of Alehaven, Durnkrag Jelcan, is a very social person and often goes out drinking with his friends, though his job comes first.

12 - Meir - The religious capital of Orliath. A sacred nation that allows pilgrims from all over the planet to come and visit the shrines to the 7 Orliathan dieties, primarily the Father of the Gods, Eranoch. It is defended by specially trained paladins (called Templars) who swear their lives to the churches they protect, and they are extremely efficient at keeping the peace.
There is no defined leader of the nation, though the leaders of each of the churches generally make all of the decisions.

Next is the Religious Parthenon. The Orliathan parthenon is comprised of 9 Gods. Unlike gods in other fantasy worlds, the Gods of Orliath regularly make themselves known in acts of divine intervention. The Gods commonly only speak to those who are either great heroes or extremely dedicated followers. A God's power over his jurisdiction on Orliath is directly related to the amount of worship her receives from the people, though the King of the Gods, Eranoch, is an exception.

RELIGION

- Eranoch (Air-Uh-Knock) - Father of all creation, and the Gods. Eranoch is portrayed as a shining ball of like with no physical form. Though his power is unaffected by the amount of worship, he is still prayed to worldwide. Eranoch rarely makes himself known, doing so usually once every couple-hundred-of-years. Eranoch is referred to as "Creator", "All-Father", or simply "Eranoch".

- Oldenhaller (Ole-Den-Hallur) - God of Magic/Wisdom/Intelligence/Water. Oldenhaller is portrayed as a wise old man in wizard's robes and carrying a white staff. Oldenhaller was originally a normal human on Orliath, but rose to godhood after his actions gave rise to several nations and the discovery of magic itself. Oldenhaller is the primary diety of Wizards, and is heavily worshiped in Deralla, though he is also worshiped by farmers. Oldenhaller is a wise god who favors those who pursue knowledge, and dislikes those who are ignorant without cause for bettering themselves. The more worship he receives, the more powerful magic is, and floods become weaker while rain favors farmers more.

- Mathias (Muh-THIGH-Us) - God of Innocence, youth, kindness and wind. Portrayed as a young, red-headed boy, Mathias is a largely forgiving God with a soft spot for the suffering. He is primarily worshiped in Cienia, though he is worshiped worldwide more so than other Gods. As worship for Mathias increases, life spans become a little longer, violent emotions become more controllable, and violent storms of thunder and tornadoes become less powerful and frequent.

- Haldiroth (Hal-Dur-Oth) - The God of war, strength, endurance and fire. Portrayed as a large, muscle-bound warrior clad in armor and wielding a huge sword, Haldiroth's worship is not particularly concentrated in one place, and instead he is worshiped by soldiers worldwide. Haldiroth is a rather serious and realistic God, doing things as rules dictate. An increase in worship for Haldiroth results in better chances of military victory for those who pray for him, stronger muscles (if one works for them), resistance to sickness, and less destructive wildfires.

- Aerthil (Air-Theel) - God of Speed, Nature, and Rangers. Portrayed as a blonde elf clad in leather armor and wielding a bow, Aerthil is a very popular diety amongst elves, particularly in Mythira, but is also worshiped to an extent by farmers. Aerthil is a kind God who cares for his worshipers very much, and dislikes those who pay no heed to nature. Increases in worship for Aerthil result in a general decrease in clumsiness, and more hardy crops and trees.

- Gareddin (Gair-uh-din) - God of the Forge, Work, Metal and Earth/Stone. Portrayed as a stout, muscly dwarf with hammer in hand. Gareddin is worshiped in Enzkaad and other Dwarven places. He is a God who appreciates the fun side in life, though he always leaves room for work, which is his top priority, and he dislikes the lazy. With much worship to Gareddin, smelted weapons and items are of better quality, metal and stone are found more frequently, and earthquakes happen less frequently.

- Iitska (EET-skuh) - Goddess of Merchants, Money, and Charisma. She is portrayed as a human woman wearing golden silks and exquisite jewelry. She is worshiped by merchants all over the globe, and thus she is especially worshiped in places like Tiranon, Cienia, and Alehaven. She is a Goddess who appreciates the ambitious and even the greedy, and dislikes the frugal and lazy. Worship to Iitska results in better financial ventures and less financial troubles, and an ease in matters of speech and persuading/impressing people.

- Eiranna (Air-anna) - Goddess of Love, Peace, Luck, and Serenity. Portrayed as a beautiful elven maiden dressed in simple cloth robes to emphasize her natural beauty. She is worshiped largely everywhere, since the desires for love, peace, and luck are almost universal. She loves all of her subjects, and is disappointed by those who give love no chance, and the violent anger her. As worship in Eiranna increases, wars become less frequent, love becomes more likely, and people get luck more often.

- Dulk Fatalis (Dulk Fay-Tah-Lus) - The Fallen God of Death, Evil, and Entropy. Originally named Neibennas (Nay-Ben-Ahss), Dulk Fatalis is portrayed as a monstrous warrior adorned in spiked armor and flames. Dulk Fatalis is a God who cares only for himself, and has a strong desire to regain his status as a true God, aiming to destroy the other 8 Gods to do so. He cares little for any mortal, even his zealous worshipers, whom he considers expendable. Worship of Dulk Fatalis is outlawed and punishable with years in prison or even death, since many rituals involve sacrifices. As worship for Dulk Fatalis increases, death by disease and other causes becomes more frequent, natural disasters increase in power, and crops fail to grow. His worshipers, misled as they are, believe that if he takes over the Parthenon, he will raise his faithful into the heavens with him.

MAGIC

In Orliath, magic is everywhere. Every person in the world (besides dwarves and those with any dwarven ancestry) has the capability to use magic. However, this power is not accessible to them from birth. In order to manipulate the ether essence around them, they must find a capable mage to imprint on them an 'ether mark'. An ether mark is what appears to be a simple tattoo, but it is, actually, much more than that.

The process of getting an ether mark is extremely painful, and can kill those of weak will or mind. Therefore, before applying to get a mark made, one must past a mental resistance test of mild difficulty before they can undergo the right.

After the process of marking (the process is basically just channeling energy to a person to activate their innate magic until the mark appears), the ether mark appears. The ether mark can be of any shape, size, or color and can be on any part of the body. The appearance of the mark is not chosen; it assumes it's own shape. No two ether marks are alike.

The matter known as 'ether' is everywhere in the world. Ether is the residue of the Gods' work on Orliath, and is present everywhere on the planet (though in higher concentration in some places than others). It is invisible to the naked eye (but spells can make high concentrations visible), and it can be detected simply; ether marks glow when in the presence of high concentrations of ether. Gnomes are the only race that can see ether unaided, and this impedes their vision when in areas high in concentration.

The act of magic itself is performed by manipulating ether into one of the three schools of magic using one's mind. The three schools are Life, Elemental, and Manipulation. All schools are divided into two sides, a white side which includes magic that helps, and a black side that includes magic that harms.

White Life Magic - Magic that heals wounds, cures disease, etc;.
Black Life Magic - Magic that slows natural healing, causes pain by controlling blood, controls a person, causes disease, etc;.
White Elemental Magic - Magic that uses the four elements to help; cooling someone off with ice, creating drinkable water, keeping someone warm by conjuring a fire, creating platforms out of earth, or even putting out a natural fire.
Black Elemental Magic - Using the four elements to harm. Throwing a fireball, an icicle, a strong gust, or a boulder count as BEM, though there are other spells.
White Manipulation Magic - Manipulating the laws of physics to move objects, causing self to float, stopping self from a dangerous fall, and picking up a room.
Black Manipulation Magic - Throwing objects at people, turning off gravity on one person to make them float uncontrollably, tearing apart the foundations of a building, etc;.

Some people are born able to use magic without ether marks. These births are very rare, and those with the special ability are called 'etherites'. Etherites are widely renowned as 'superhuman' (or superelven, supergnomish, etc;) and have overall heightened abilities than the average person. They live 50-60 years longer than others of their race, and are considered 'Oldenhaller's Chosen'. Many of the great leaders and prophets in Orliathan history were Etherites. Etherite blood glows light blue when exposed to high concentrations of ether.

Etherites live with many strengths, but also suffer from some inconveniences.
-Extremely vivid dreams and nightmares, which lead to lack of sleep.
-Frequent headaches
-Possible Attraction from Demons, which may seek to use them or their powers as tools to wreak havoc on the mortal world.
-Dwarves and Dun'Gar tend to not trust Etherites, who view them as 'demon beacons'.
-Amplified emotions and feelings
-Difficulty in controlling magic until training is received (especially as a child).

Etherites can be detected when they cast a spell; their eyes flash a single monotonous color when they do so. Their blood also causes them to faintly glow in high concentrations of ether.

Ether marks are usually applied by Etherites, but they can be done by powerful marked mages. Being an Etherite is completely random and has no influence from genes.

Known Etherites include King Lexaeus Vendal of Vendalior, and Supreme Judge Magister Judaias Delnarra of Cienia.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 7:01 am 
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Avron the S'wit wrote:
Unwritten (what a pun), I think that sounds interesting. You certainly hooked my interest about what is going on, which is half the battle. I would read more.

Steampunk is an interesting genre that I haven't much experience with, but the little I like is always fascinating. I say go for it!


Thanks, I definitely don't have as much on this as on my other stories, but I do think its worth putting some thought into. I will continue to post updates as they come, which will probabaly be random at best since I do have other stories that currently take priority.

I just like the idea behind most steampunk, I've just haven't had much luck till now to create a story with it.

@Unionhack
Interesting what you have so far, I like the way you have so much detail thought already. I do that myself when I can't think of any more on the plot I move to filling in the history, cultures, and the rest. I like your races as well, interesting mix. Good job on the race names too, I find that most people just come up with words that are either extremely long and compllicated or short and unimaginative. You have found a good middle. What do you have on a story so far?

@Azura
I'm also curious as to what the story is behind your post as well, please elaborate!

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 8:21 pm 
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My story involves a young elven noble in Tiranon who accidentally kills a guard while defending a beggar, and runs away by joining a mercenary guild as a freelance courier. His first job is to deliver a letter to the King of Vendalior; but out of curiosity he opens it, and finds it to be a slave order for about 2 dozen Dun'gar slaves; Slavery is illegal in Vendalior and our young elven protagonist is too morally good to let this pass, so he takes it upon himself to find out why the king is buying slaves, to free the slaves, and to expose the king's treachery.
The book will be called 'Tales of Orliath: The Courier'. I plan to write at least 5 books, each of them titled 'The [insert plot relevant noun here]'.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 8:23 pm 
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I have two stories I'm working on: One, one of those Morrowind Diaries, Two, a "Diary of a Charmander". Looks like I like working on Diaries.


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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:39 pm 
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What I am currently working on is called 'The Darkthorn Bloodline', and is based around a man named Vokun and the literal internal struggle he faces after killing a Khajiit. It is basically to whet your appetites for my book, 'Dragonshadow', which is being written offline as opposed to The Darkthorn Bloodline which is being written online

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Nov 22, 2011 10:19 pm 
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What I'm currently working on is "Rise of the Scribs" (scribbane, don't be offended.) It's where scribs rise up and invade Morrowind and bordering provinces. I'm trying to get it done by the end of the year.


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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 4:11 am 
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I'm brainstorming about a Story that take places almost immediately after the main quest of Skyrim. A necromancer (somehow) created a giant undead army to destroy Skyrim. My Dovahkiin that I'm playing of course tries to stop the necromancer with the help from the Greybeards, and others (including my other character I'm currently playing). Although I know what the ending will be, I'm working on main ideas for the story, and details (like how the necromancer creates the army, how Dovahkiin will stop him, and basically everything else).

I don't know exactly how long the story will be, but hopefully this will be the first one I'll finish. I'm really excited and interested in writing it.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 5:31 pm 
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Grand Master
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addictedtomorrowind wrote:
What I'm currently working on is "Rise of the Scribs" (scribbane, don't be offended.)

On the contrary. Perhaps it will give scrib an entrance for a sequel as the great Bane of Scribs that he is. 8)

I_am_one wrote:
I'm brainstorming about a Story that take places almost immediately after the main quest of Skyrim.

Oh man, those are my favorites. You have to share it with us!

I've actually been laying out a fanfiction about the end of the Oblivion crisis - a sort of story I came up with after asking what the heck happened in the Empire as it crumbled. I've been collecting bits of lore here and there and I think I'll soon have enough to make it a plausible little story.

But, no new adventures for me until I finish the fanfiction I started. It's such a hard genre for me. Speaking of which, I should probably upload the new chapter...

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 8:51 pm 
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Grand Master
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Quote:
Avron the S'wit wrote:
addictedtomorrowind wrote:
What I'm currently working on is "Rise of the Scribs" (scribbane, don't be offended.)

On the contrary. Perhaps it will give scrib an entrance for a sequel as the great Bane of Scribs that he is. 8)


Well... the scribs in the story
Spoiler:
rise and defeat everybody
and only stop when they get treated fairly....


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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Wed Dec 07, 2011 2:37 am 
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Journeyman
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I've been trying to write "Valka Nemoc" which transaltes to Disease of War. It is about America sending out a biological warfare newly created bacteria. A shuttle crashes and spreads the disease across the world. Only some people immune survive. The story is on how the adapt.

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 Post subject: Re: The Writer's Guild
PostPosted: Wed Dec 07, 2011 1:37 pm 
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I have been brainstorming about a few stories for a while now, all of them about interaction with Daedric Princes and the inherently volatile nature of such dealings. A mixture between action/adventure/thriller and theology. :)


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