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Cassandra #2:
Well, there's nothing in particular that I needed to learn. You can think of this as more of a scouting mission, I suppose. My research will be submitted in a report to the Captain, along with reports from various other crewmembers who have (hopefully) managed to find themselves in other timelines. As to what we do with the information, there is a very likely chance that it won't concern you.

Okay.. Nothing ominous in that answer. I mean, it's certainly not like I have one more chance to probe for a greater deal.. Oh who am I kidding I already stopped caring after the second letter Waste of a question, I swear, but I do plan to rectify that now

Count me as one with vanity, but to both of you.. How exactly do you feel about Artificial Intelligence constructs? How would you exactly feel being one? Ascending beyond the strictly physical form? Or are there any strong feels that have been derived from various impressions with such (charming) entities?

Not that I absolutely need to know these things.. I just, well

Current A.I's: 2
Wannabe A.I's: 1
Toast: Toast

Guess who can't sleep. Ted Mosby said that nothing good ever happens after 2 AM, but since when has Ted Mosby been right?

Cassandra #2:
Well look at that. We both managed to waste our second question on something we really couldn't care less about. We should have just made it two for two. Though you realize that you’re technically asking two different questions here, right? But I guess that’s okay.

Cassandra #1:
How I feel about AI? They’re just fine, I suppose. I don't really care one way or the other. Impressive monuments to how far humans have come technologically, for sure. And they can be interesting to have conversations with. I’m not sure what else to say. They're cool.

Cassandra #2:
I can’t help but feel that they get the short end of the stick. So close to being alive, and yet, unable to truly live (not that every AI actually wishes that they were alive). It's sad, I think.

Cassandra #2:
There would be nothing that I’d hate more. AIs have intelligence, indeed. But it’s artificial. You’re artificial. You lack the realness that makes existence worth it. You don’t have a burning sense of curiosity, of hope, of desire. You exist, but it's not like you have some sort of deep, personal conviction that you're existing for. As much as I understand it, at least.

Cassandra #1:
You’ll never lie listening to music in your bed in the dark, and suddenly be overwhelmed by a song and start crying. You’ll never be with a friend and see something so funny that you laugh until you can’t breath and you’re just making strange squeaking noises, and no-one apart from the two of you will understand what the heck happened that time. You’ll never sit in a canoe in the middle of a lake in the middle of nowhere and suddenly take in just how complex and beautiful the world is, and your head hurts from trying to comprehend and your face hurts because you can’t help but smile. You’ll never walk into some big, old, beautiful place, and be satisfied to just sit and stare for a while because something like that deserves your full attention. My gosh, there are so many wonderful things about being alive.

You may be smarter than us, and maybe you won’t ever mess up, and perhaps you won’t ever have to deal with pain. But the good parts of living make up for the bad parts you have to face. And I guess the bad parts make the good parts even better. So I would never want to be an AI.

Cassandra #2:
Me too, I would never want to be an AI. And I feel bad for you.

I never called myself an A.I., o mighty one. Nor am I trying to be one. It sounds horrible. I'd be like you! Yeesh! No no no, I'm a human consciousness that happens to be having an out of body experience, and I don't intend to renounce my humanity. In fact, let me respond to that vitriolic little speech.

Do I acknowledge it? Yes. Will I also acknowledge the benefits of using vague on overarching questions to reach a similar topic as previously displayed by yours truly? Also yes

I have no shame or morals, you should already know that by now(and 1-1, you should definitely know that) Cool Perspectives are a fickle thing. Something tells me you would say the same thing had our roles been reversed I exist because I want to.. I yearn for it because I must.. I dread it because what if that is all that will define me? Even when all goes cold and silent? Just.. Existence? Or lack there off...

[What would h͘҉ę̶̀ think of me if I just, gave up?] If we were discussing that of the lower constructs.. Then yes, you would have a remarkable understanding on their qualms. On their ignorance of true sentience. Of how empty their simulated understanding is..

[Life can be such a cold.. Cold ordeal]

The corner stone for ever sentient A.I. to become self-aware is to first come to terms with itself. With, how you humans have forever pondered over, your own mortality. Some of us deal with it better than others. Some just.. Prefer silence

[You have much to learn. Like a reflection, within a mirror.] Is.. Is that pity I'm hearing? Are.. Are you two pitying me? Why.. That's just.. Huh.. Mmmmm Cassandra. Our Cassandra.. I mean. When you are finished here. Please place your hand on the scanner so that I can make the final preparations so the two of you can be on your way

*pours cup after cup after cup after cup after cup after cup of coffee to relieve the stress*

Ah yes, "Mars" The Empire of Dovah has dismissed all claims of an ancient race of mythical beings that say Wat? a lot.


However, the Empire of Dovah adknowledges that Cassandra is breaking all rules of inter-multiverse travel and therefore, must be deleted before this universe is rendered obselete.

Praise be Dovah.

The Godking Madking Sheolord Dovah has SPOKEN!

Oh and stop nicking my CHEESE! I put that cheese planet there for my own personal USE! I WILL EAT YOUR LIVERS RAW AND USE YOUR SOULS AS FIREWOOD!

*The excessive coffee production begins to slowly come to a halt now that things are calmer*



*a fittingly melancholic song begins to play on the private channel*

*Silence*

Cassandra #1:
Well, I didn't want to put it in so many words, but yes. I pity you quite a lot, actually. I mean, you're a sad, sad, being. And it comes through every time I talk to you. I can't help but feel bad for you.

But you should probably get on to solving the Mars issue, so we'll get out of here now.

*places hand on scanner*

-glances at umpteen filled coffee cups; grabs one and places it within coffee machine-

Do you also dispense steamed milk? Chocolate syrup? Make with both, please.

One chocolate cappuccino, coming up. Ah, it's like my first summer job all over again. Except I don't even have to move!

Whatever you do, do not order the extra large latte. Not because I programmed it via hacking into it to replace all lattees with pictures of lattees, me drinking all the lattees. And the chocolate, that is in fact, Kraft chocolate! Wow, I'm kinda a ****. No-one should be exposed to Kraft Chocolate. I'll get an apology ready. At some point. Maybe. Never. Blame Aarah. It was Aarah's fault!

Yes, thank you, sentient coffeemaker boss. I don't drink coffee unless it's drowned--DROWNED--in chocolate and milk, at which point it's more milkshake than coffee. Like how White Russians are arguably more milkshake than mixed drink.

...-Can- you dispense White Russians? The cynic in me says that the coffeemaker may well be stocked with vodka.

-Devours bagel whilst surreptitiously placing empty coffee cup into machine-

I might finally be able to tackle the backlog of grievances issued by the crew...

*There seems to be a hum in the database chamber*

*Without warning, a small mechanical needle manifests from the chair, puncturing Cassandra's 2 brain* *The machine retreats, leaving Cassandra 2 unconscious and stable* *Cassandra 1 feels a sudden pressure on the back of her head*

Oh my god...dude I told you! I told you not to do it!

Mmmmm

Oh. Oh, I see. Yeah, okay. Sorry, emotions, y'know? I still get them sometimes.

Mars.. Your overreacting

Shush. Do your thing.