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I have a problem. Earlier today I was on my computer having fun and out of the corner of my eye I saw the biggest god-damn spider I have ever seen in my life. I'm not kidding around; this thing was big. If you put it on an American dollar coin its legs would have easily reached the ends. Naturally I killed it with the biggest book I had to-hand but now I'm petrified of going back into the room. This happened at 11:00. It is now almost 5. I have gotten no sleep, I've been trying to sleep in the couch in the foyer trying not to think about it. I'm cleaning that room before work today. No more clutter on the floor for spiders to hide under.

Fun fact: whilst attempting to google "how to get rid of spiders" on my phone I got the search suggestion "how to roll a joint." That cheered me up a little.

So, you're saying you're an alien?

It's not so different that she won't appreciate a gift that aligns with her interests.

N.B. The more intense but less well known the interest the better.

If she's your girlfriend, you should have a good idea of what things she likes and what interests she has. You don't need to know how a 'girl's mind works', you're not trying to figure out the psychology of the female brain- just buying something thoughtful for someone that you love.

Still relevant to repeat

Okay, I'll try.



Cavahk vhoddjvhh hjgdh hhdjd. Hjx jvvbh cjfkv?

No no no no no. If your gonna do that..

You should put spider warnings on your pics. Crawldragon has suffered enough.

I know what you mean about a messy floor not helping, CD. In the warmer months, I always do a spider check before going to bed and it helps give some peace of mind. Spring and Autumn, when the weather starts to turn, are bad times for spiders coming in the house.

Mix tape with 80s love ballads. Must be on cassette or it doesn't count. Put on Separate Ways by Journey and play the air drums to it while headbanging and occasionally pointing at her while singing the lyrics.


Definitely stay away from FL. Banana Spiders' size averages the size of your hand. Still, the wolf spiders creep me out more. They have too much confidence. Also when I'm weeding in the garden I'll have to deal with spiders that have tunnels in the soil. The worst spiders we have oddly enough are tiny; brown recluses and black widows. They love making webs underneath plastic lawn chairs too.

Those guys can be aggressive too. 90% of spiders run away. The 1 time in my life a spider 'charged' me was a black widow.

ninjad

Spiders are not dangerous, you humans are. Now I don't know whether killing a spider counts as bad karma or not.

He he he he he, I love spiders.

Wait! Spiders! I have plan for the best birthday gift ever.

Cheesy but classic. Only problem is finding a cassette player lurking around in this day and age.


Makes me glad to be in the colder, Northern climes, for sure.


Balance has been restored.

@prophet
Does she like spiders? If you're not sure, I'd say buying her a large arachnid is probably I dodgy idea.

Yeah [&@%!] alllll of that noise. There isn't a lot I like about the cold north, but one thing I enjoy is the mass death of spiders and deadly bugs by frost. The only deadly spiders in CT are the black widow and brown recluse, and they're generally on the down-low around here. Not a lot of venemous snakes, either. I guess venom is naturally selected for in warm climates more than cold.

It kind of sucks that the most spread out critters in the US are both deadly and hard to get rid of. I actually looked up states which don't have venemous spiders when I was growing up, and there are none. I thought I had a sure shot with Alaska, but apparently they have black widows too, so I might as well just cower inside an airtight anti-spider vault for the rest of my life.


I'm officially banning you from entering the United States. In fact you're not allowed in the same hemisphere as me anymore. You have horrified me in new and interesting ways.

The UK has only one venomous snake, the Adder.
The beastie I hate most in Summer is the wasp. Hate em'. Nasty little buggers.

At least you're probably better off than Australia for bugs.

Is your room spider free and safe to return to now, CD?

No. In the absence of booze or restful sleep I'm waiting for copious nicotine-free vaporizer liquid and coffee to rekindle my courage. My key priority is to get my bed and desk away from the walls, because I've made the rather bone-headed decision of making the parts of the room I frequent most the shadiest corners of the place. That's where the BFS was headed when I spotted it.

Spiders are cute. ;:::)

50,000 points to griffindor!



Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.



I know an arachnophobe when I see one. I hot my spider affection from her spider shaped earrings, Shelob save us all.

My neighbor is so nice. She woke up and asked me why the hell I was sleeping in the foyer. I told her I got freaked out by a massive spider and she told me with the state of my room there are probably hundreds in there. Thanks for that.

I don't mind spiders. As Aarah said, the UK lacks natural dangerous animals. The only snake that can poison you is the adder and i think, even then, it takes a very long time to kill you or is very weak. Now, Wasps, I hate those [&@%!]! Bees, they are equally in the things that Dovah hates but bees are a one hit trick. Seagulls are a pest down in my part of the UK and I heard talks about there being plans to deal with them.

I love all animals, but one - humans. Ugh, these strange creatures never leave me alone. And I was once bitten by a spider when I was 6. I didn't get Spiderman-like powers (dreams crushed) but then I got a terrible disease, and I'm still suffering from that disease.

I don't feel hungry after eating, I don't feel thirsty after drinking water, I don't feel sleepy after sleeping; and the doctor asked me to sit in the sun all night long.

There's a song in there somewhere...

Erm.....


Untill a couple of guys were up to no good. I got into one little fight and my momma got scared. "Off to live with your auntie in Bel-air!" I begged and begged to stay...

What? It's the only thing that came to mind in terms of songs. Either the random Fresh Prince lyric work or not. This is techically part of the earlier seasons one but I can see why they cut it out for time reasons. *sigh* We don't get shows with those types of themes anymore.

I know that outside of venomous ones (of which there are none where I live) spiders are fine. But I just can't get over the feeling that they're terrifying abominations which should not be. Again, spiders in Ireland aren't so bad so I just avoid them and everything seems to work out fine. Although I hate when I'm in the same room as a spider and then I lose track of where they are.

Lot of snakes are very cute.

As i mentioned before and variou times, down 'ere in the 'outh of englan'.... yeah, we don't talk like that. At least, not us SouthEastern folks. But we have major seagull issues. They are cliffracers. In fact, Cliffracers would be perferable. At least, you know their intentions and not feel paranoid everytime you see one, like Seagulls. They are noisy buggers and really do not care. If you have food, they will attempt to steal it.

One day, I may accidentally suplex one.

Not to burst any bubbles, but Aarah >_> wolf spiders are very much an able northern climate spider. And they do not mess around Their big, hairy, and love to jump. But their not all that bad, I mean, for starters their none venomous, don't build webs, and have a tendency to hunt other spiders and small pests. That includes Black Widows(which are bad, mkay)

Seriously, I found one in the backwoods of a friends place, and rather than let her kill it.. I kid you not, I took it home and let it loose in my garage where it lived for three weeks before disappearing. His name of Steve, he was a good spider<3