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You're talking to me as if I'm condescending intersexed people. I am not. I'm very familiar with being a minority.
I'm sorry if I came off the wrong way, but I'm tired and have had a rather annoying day. Thanks to Avron for saving me the typing

I'm notoriously tactless. I assure you, that isn't what I think.
But, to be quite frank, your "outside the norm" remark is the kind of thing I've been taught to be anxious about. For me, these things are quite inside the norm, because my entire life is characterized by things that work just fine for people who aren't autistic, or non binary, or one of my other minorities, and don't work for me.

But these things not working for someone is an isolated event for the people who keep those things going, and so it's dismissed as such. It amounts to a simple "you're not like me, and so you deserve what you get", in my eyes. An isolated event for every person in your percieved norm amounts to an entire life for someone else, and you're telling me, intentionally or not, that it should stay that way.

No, definitely not. All I'm saying is that the chance is rather narrow and that if someone is intersexed, they will state it regardless of the options in the profile if they are comfortable with sharing it on the internet, or keep it to themselves.

So it's a cis-people only feature? Sure, it's just a small field but wouldn't it be better to just get it right from the start?

I certainly wouldn't mind. But just to consider: the option will probably be abused.

Depends on what it is and how it is implemented, there's not much to do with a simple "other" option.

That's true. And everyone would get to do their shenanigans too. Yep, I think 'other' would be the best option.

"Other" is mostly how I've seen it done when there is a third option but I could grab the list of that BDSM forum to give an example of what options could be given.

I don't see why that's so bad, honestly. Does nobody set silly locations or statuses?
In reply to your narrow chance point: Your chance is high enough that you've got someone who has a non binary gender & sex right here talking to you, and they're in another minority that nobody expects on forums (arguably three, in fact) too. Those are long odds indeed.

Well, it's something I've never really encountered before, so apologies for my possibly inconsiderate attitude. I didn't know better I suppose.

It's quite alright, I used to be much worse regarding minorities not my own.

So mods, what do you say?

Oh, and here's the choices from the BDSM forum. You shold see their choices for relationship status, it's a wonderfully long list.


And we still think you're cute Mars. Go put up some more pictures!

All righty then. I appreciate that there are perhaps more than just 'male' and 'female' but this is an Elder Scrolls forum. This is literally here so some people don't get called she or he by mistake. That's what was requested, that's what I added. I really think that this could be taken too far within the context of this forum - and you know that's not just me being unfair, that's how loads of places see it. And by the divines, I am not going to add a custom text field. Can you imagine the crap some people would type in there?

And now you're getting further requests to add a little something for those that are excluded by the binary. People do hang out here after all, it's not all TES.

And what does it matter how other places see it? All forums set their own standards and I don't see this place being harmed from adding a little more non-vanilla friendliness.

But you aren't? I know you like being called trans T, and that's perfectly fine, but people on this forum are going to want to call you she, not it. And as Tom's pointed out, the sole purpose of this feature is to make sure people don't make the mistake of getting your gender confused.

If "Loads of places do it" was a valid excuse for things like this, nobody would have left the frigging Dark Ages. No, that isn't what you added. If you wanted a pronoun option, you could have added a pronoun option, without this misgendering binarism. How is what people would put in a custom text field any different to what people already put in the location field and so on?

A simple "other" option can't really be abused if that's what you end up going for.

Regardless of why this was implemented you have to look at what it actually is, a choose your gender option that doesn't acknowledge anything past the binary. If it was only about pronouns you could just as well have added a "Choose your pronoun!" but gender is about much more than pronouns. Maybe I'm overly optimistic to expect this place to be this progressive but isn't it better to get this properly implemented right away?

As it stands now it isn't even optional for everyone, you can't choose to use it if it doesn't include you.


I'm fine being called a she since English, in my opinion, doesn't have a good gender neutral pronoun. Not to mention that it is my biological gender.



Huh, semi-ninja'd.

Really, requesting more options here is just silly, in my opinion. This is an option, people. For those who wonder, for those who care, for those who want to know: "Am I talking to a man or a woman, a boy or a girl?". Frankly, seeing that these are ES forums, where, as has been said, gender (because here, as far as I'm concerned, whether you have male or female parts is not at issue. What is at issue is whether you regard yourself as male or female for the purposes of the forums) is not really an issue, anything beyond "male" or "female" can be put in your signature, or your status, if you want the rest of us to know. Things get blown so completely out of proportion sometimes.

And with that, I will bow out of this discussion without another word.

And this is why I think it's silly.

T, you raise a good point. Since English only has two gender pronouns - she and he - (and will never gain a third - pronouns are considered a closed family group and will take many, many, many decades of linguistic change to be reintroduced [/professional opinion]) and since this site is conducted in English, the completely optional gender field is, technically, fine as it is. If you don't think you can decide, please leave it blank, for simplicity's sake.

There will be no more adding of stuff and things. This is a gaming forum, a forum about and founded around, games. End of story. I'm beginning to think about just taking out what I've already put in, but that would make even more people unhappy.


Because there are two biological genders (which is what this is is all about, remember, and don't try and tell me it isn't because I added the flipping thing) and thousands of possible locations. Yes, people put strange stuff in there but they may not want people to know their location. You may also not want people to know your gender. That's fine with me, but I'm not adding another custom text field.

Actually, a gender neutral pronoun is being introduced into Swedish.

Y'know, there are more than two biological genders. But if that's what it is about you could at least change it to sex, there's an important difference between sex and gender.

Yes, but not English.

Let's just try this for now, as it is, as a test. Perhaps we will remove it.

If there are two "biological genders", perhaps you can explain to me the bare basics, like intersexed people with XYY chromosomes, why the medical profession disagrees with you and why my body doesn't fit either option on your sex binary.

Actually there are a bunch but none that has gained any considerable recognition. Swedish was lucky enough to get one that fit nicely with our he's and she's.