Post subject: Brisalkar a new nation(strong critism acceptable)
Posted: Sun Dec 04, 2011 3:46 pm
Apprentice
Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2011 7:36 am Posts: 186
ES Games: Oblivion, Morrowind, Arena, skyrim
Platform: PS3
UESPoints: 0
I'm trying to get a good roleplay going for my tes adventures, also for my novelling im trying at. My main characters are centered into the Exploration Division, whose squad is ranked at C1, and 2 from the Shadow Veil Division. And what i got going on in my head is that their squad is slowly learning what their nation is truly up too, and well the other two characters are sent out, to kill this little squad, as to keep the true goals of Brisalkar hidden.
No real spoiler, just long.
Spoiler:
Brisalkar- TES story Brisalkar Nation is a currently small faction, atleast in relevance to other Largest factions, such as the Thalmors or Imperial faction. Located on the Brisalkar continent, off the shores of elsywer, population is made up of, most mer and beast race, but as of 4E 21 when the thalmor uprised in actions to other races, most thalmor who believed in the Thalmor Embassy were asked to return to shimmering isles, as to retain Brisalkars neutrality. It is also noted that no race of man other than Breton, have lived on this small continent. Brisalkars' government is quite limited, but does get involved in outside affairs, and is made up of a monarchy High Queen and High King, with separated military sections. The Military sections are, the Magical Research Division, Knights & Paladins Brisalkar Defensive Division, Magic Warriors Division, Royal Guards, and Foreign Affairs Diplomatic Division, which is also separated into each province on the tamerial continent. There are other factions mixed in between each Division, one im particular is the Brisalkar Exploration Group, many officials refer to this group as the "errand divison" as fitting as it is, sense what they do is supply info from and to Brisalkar and other nations, depending on the area and activities in areas different ranks of this division will be dispatched, the ranks of the groups are as follows from lowest to highest, E, D, C, C1, B, B1, B2, A, A1, A2, A3, S, and Ss. Those ranks hold no meaning other than the groups abilities. This groups jobs include scouting, mapping, interventions, artifact retrival, and sometimes as mercenaries. The people of Brisalkar are nearly free to do as they please, as long as it serves no harm to others, basic morals, and Brisalkars neutrality. Anyone causing troubles, that effect our neutrality will be held responsible for the nation, as is anyone whom is found in cooperation. One group that the government remains hidden from its people, is the Shrouded Veils, most identify them being a Morag Tang, or Dark Brother hood wannabe faction, but most would be wrong, they do not listen to a divine power and are operated by the government. This group is rarely seen being used against anyone other than rogue agents of other more public Divisions. High Queen and High King have no authority over most actions as a whole of the nation other than trifles among the populace. The history of Brisalkar isn't long as it wasn't inhabited until after the attack of Umbriel. The original inhabiters were from Argonia, Valenwood and Elsywer.
Also i would like some descriptions of what the climate south of Tameriel woukd be like, sense thats the location of Brisalkar.
_________________ "Ultimate Mage" Guide I plan on making a warriors, stealth, and hybrid character guide. Community Noveling "The only reason you could disagree is because your are losing so badly you cannot see it." -J'zargo Brisalkar: MyNation
Post subject: Re: Brisalkar a new nation(strong critism acceptable)
Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2011 2:52 pm
Novice
Joined: Sat Nov 19, 2011 10:19 pm Posts: 56 Location: contemplating mysticism somewhere beyond Nirn
ES Games: I-V, RG, BS
Platform: PC
UESPoints: 0
Firstly, in terms of writing, the grammar needs some work, but I can see you have some ideas in place and are obviously quite dedicated. The Thalmor aspect is believable since they have a good deal of influence now in Valenwood and Elsweyr. The factions, however, seem slightly over-developed compared to the rest of the lore, but this might just be my initial impression. I'll read it over again sometime later. Also, I'm very militant when it comes to non-canon - i.e. fan fiction - work, so I'm probably biased.
Re: the climate south of Tamriel: we know little of Pyandonea and Thras which represent the landmasses in that area, but Thras, being known as the Coral Kingdom, is almost certainly a tropical island chain. The amphibious nature of the Sload indicate that there is not a great deal of land, although perhaps there is, and that rather the Sload are merely aquatic by nature. Pyandonea again has great reefs that can tear apart ships, and seems to have many lagoons and tropical jungles, so again we are talking about hot and humid climes, rather like the south of Valenwood and Elsweyr. AFAIK any more details would be conjectural in nature, but I'm sure you could gleam more details from the UESP lore section and the Imperial Library site.
Post subject: Re: Brisalkar a new nation(strong critism acceptable)
Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2012 2:53 pm
Apprentice
Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2011 7:36 am Posts: 186
ES Games: Oblivion, Morrowind, Arena, skyrim
Platform: PS3
UESPoints: 0
CorneliusFunk wrote:
Firstly, in terms of writing, the grammar needs some work, but I can see you have some ideas in place and are obviously quite dedicated. The Thalmor aspect is believable since they have a good deal of influence now in Valenwood and Elsweyr. The factions, however, seem slightly over-developed compared to the rest of the lore, but this might just be my initial impression. I'll read it over again sometime later. Also, I'm very militant when it comes to non-canon - i.e. fan fiction - work, so I'm probably biased.
Re: the climate south of Tamriel: we know little of Pyandonea and Thras which represent the landmasses in that area, but Thras, being known as the Coral Kingdom, is almost certainly a tropical island chain. The amphibious nature of the Sload indicate that there is not a great deal of land, although perhaps there is, and that rather the Sload are merely aquatic by nature. Pyandonea again has great reefs that can tear apart ships, and seems to have many lagoons and tropical jungles, so again we are talking about hot and humid climes, rather like the south of Valenwood and Elsweyr. AFAIK any more details would be conjectural in nature, but I'm sure you could gleam more details from the UESP lore section and the Imperial Library site.
Thanks for the reply, and at the time i was dedicated to TES, but that went away, its nothing to do with TES now, but another new game idea. As of now i have a good 3 games i wanna make when i become a game designer, two of which will have sequels.
_________________ "Ultimate Mage" Guide I plan on making a warriors, stealth, and hybrid character guide. Community Noveling "The only reason you could disagree is because your are losing so badly you cannot see it." -J'zargo Brisalkar: MyNation
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