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Heart's Desire by Silius Cania

From horror master Silius Cania comes a new spine-chilling tale. A store has just opened in the town of Hobb's End in High Rock. Housing an unusual collection of curios, the storekeep Mister Greenhart and his scamp assistant promise his collection has something for everyone and is always eager to strike a deal with those who come through his doors. But everything has a price and we don't always pay in Septims.

Buyer Beware.

Shoot the Moon by Caius Cosades
Caius Cosades has been clean for four months, and now he's revealing his secrets to the public. This ex-Grand Spymaster lost his money, job, and shirt to his skooma problem, but ever since he became drug-free, he's dedicated his life to helping others in need. Now with his 12 part process to total rehabilitation, quitting has never been easier. Whether you're a drug-addled Khajiit or a reckless smuggler, you're guaranteed to find success, or your money back! You don't have to shoot the moon to recover from your sugar addiction.

Battle of the Tongues: A Report on the events of Solthesim by UNKNOWN

In the year 201 of the 4th era, The Dragons returned and a hero known as the Dragonborn rose up to face them. Everyone knows how he stopped the World Eater but what isn't known is how there was a First and that all of Tamriel was threatened by this. This book contains reports of the battles he faced to stop the First. Also known as Miraak. The two dragonborn. The first and the last. This book contains accounts of those who were present at the time.

Pre-order from The White Beard in Solitude and get the complete Lusty Argonian Maid boxset for 40 septims!

The Five Companions were a group of drug addicts who embarked on a quest to rediscover their passion for drugs during the Interregnum. They were led by Emperor Varen Aquilarios of the Empire of Cyrodiil, who desired to use the Amulet of Kings to rekindle the Dragonfires in a ritual aimed at persuading Sanguine to spread his drug addiction throughout all life on Nirn, and thus bring a new age of enlightenment.

This corrupted ritual had triggered a catastrophe which the Elder Scrolls named the Soulburst of Idiocy. During an unknowable time afterward many were subjected to the products of their own imagination some had even believed Nirn itself was melding with the planes of Oblivion.

But throughout all the chaos nothing was as devastating as a mind-addled self-proclaimed champion of Tamriel who believed their soul had been lost to deadra and that the world was plagued with war.

The Five Companions were a group of drug addicts who embarked on a quest to rediscover their passion for drugs during the Interregnum. They were led by Emperor Varen Aquilarios of the Empire of Cyrodiil, who desired to use the Amulet of Kings to rekindle the Dragonfires in a ritual aimed at persuading Sanguine to spread his drug addiction throughout all life on Nirn, and thus bring a new age of enlightenment. The other four Companions consisted of some of the greatest fighters and minds of that time. Lyris Titanborn, a Nord warrior said to have the blood of giants, served Varen as his personal diaper changer. Sai Sahan, the Redguard Captain of Varen's Dragonguard, was charged with protecting the group from nay saying drug haters. Abnur Tharn, Chancellor of the Elder Council and Varen's, supplier accompanied Varen in his capacity as Imperial Pansy. Lastly, there was Mannimarco, a legendary necromancer who held considerable drug induced lollygagging with Varen and claimed to know how to conduct the Dragonfire ritual.

In 2E 579, having successfully located the amulet and returned to the Imperial City, Varen and the Companions initiated the ritual with the Amulet. It was then that Mannimarco relieved himself in the dragonfires and corrupted the ritual, triggering a catastrophe which the Elder Scrolls named the Soulburst of Idiocy. A powerful explosion of magical energy swept across Nirn, setting the plane adrift in a drugged induced stupor of untold proportions, where many were subjected to the products of the own imagination and some had even believed Nirn itself was melding with the planes of Oblivion.
Varen vanished in the chaos of the Soulburst, allegedly transcending to drug fueled folly itself in the blast. In the immediate aftermath, Sai Sahan managed to secure the Amulet of Kings and fled from the Imperial City to raise the amulet as his own, taking it to the ruins of the city of Sancre Tor, the burial site of the Reman emperors. Mannimarco made Lyris Titanborn his own nanny, and Abnur Tharn, seeking to preserve his status, pledged his loyalty to literally becoming a paper weight. The Five Companions and Varen's chaotic dream for Tamriel eventually came to an end, and the world was set on a course for the war to end all drugs.

But throughout all the chaos nothing was as devastating as a mind-addled self-proclaimed champion of Tamriel who believed their soul had been lost to deadra and that the world was plagued with war. The strangest account is that this champion would change which side of their imaginary world war they were supporting leading to even more bloodshed. With drug induced fervor they would kill almost any living thing in their path and desecrate many holy sites throughout the world in their plans to end war and rid the world of supposed daedric influence.

In this exciting installment from the same author that brought us last year's best seller 'As Easy As CHIM' and the popular classic 'To Kill a Troll', may we present this surprise hit!

As we follow along in this edition, Sir Ellan Nya will guide us through the proper etiquette to keep home and Empire at it's finest and to keep the unwanted filth at bay.

You find not one house maid without this charming guide tucked beneath their beds, and it has made it's way to Imperial barracks as well. Even the Draugr from Skyrim could learn a thing or two here. Truly, an exciting and informative read! Learn how one may chase, wash away, punish the grime that always seems to sway into our lives. There is not a page where one will find it lacking. So come, join us in this fine print!

Available at your local quirky bookstore while supplies still last!

*Currently banned in Vvardenfell due to past misgivings with the author
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