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Vote for your favourite Bard
Poll ended at Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:14 pm
Last Saturalia by Clavicus "Vile" Kerr 54%  54%  [ 7 ]
O Great Daedric Siege Crawler by BetaB17 Dagon 8%  8%  [ 1 ]
You Better Not Cry by Alduin, the Forum Eater (TheSheoDovah) 8%  8%  [ 1 ]
Jingle Yells by MARS, mod of the Era 15%  15%  [ 2 ]
I have a little Dagger by the Eldritch Horror, MetaCthulhu 15%  15%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 13
Author Message
 Post subject: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 1:06 pm 
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Goatmom/Moderator
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Welcome one and all to the Competition of the Month!


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These monthly competitions are a chance for you to demonstrate your creativity and talents while getting a chance to know your fellow members and have a little fun. Each month is going to have a different theme and a different talent – and maybe a surprise or two! But only one member can wear the purple coins and fancy title of CotM Winner! Do you have what it takes?

The basic rules are as follows:
Hidden:
» Members can contribute pieces based on the talent (writing, art, screenshots, etc.) and theme during the submission period, after which no further entries will be accepted. Then we will vote via a poll to see who gets to wear that month’s winner’s badge!

» If you are posting artwork, please post a link from an off-forum website such as Photobucket; if you are posting a written piece, please hide it under a spoiler when creating a new post. This is to ensure that posts are not too long and the thread appears orderly for everyone. If you are unsure how to do either of these, don’t be afraid to ask!

» Be respectful and polite about your fellow members’ work. Anyone who says anything rude about another’s work will be hearing from a member of the Mod Squad and may not be allowed to participate in the next competition. There is no such thing as “good” or “bad,” and everyone has a unique way of demonstrating his or her talents. Enjoy the variety!

» All members are welcome to join, including moderators. Don’t forget that we’re members, too!


This month's challenge is to compose, pen, and/or record a TES themed Christmas Saturalia jingle! With or without accompanying string arrangements.

It's Christmas December 2nd and those of you enslaved by Coca-Cola Santa have probably already started decorating. Even our cold cynics can't deny that we all feel at least a little bit of a warm tingle around this time of merriment, and what better way to express our jolly spirits than through song! Let your festive-eager minds run wild and give me songs.

-Must be TES themed as always



Our schedule for the December event is as follows:
[02.12.2016]: Competition begins! Start planning and send in those submissions!
[22.12.2016-30.12.2016]: Voting period – vote for your favorites!
[31.12.2016]: Our winner is announced!
Please note that all times are determined by me, Mars, and therefore will run according to GMT +1. (Click here if you’re unsure when, exactly, that is!)

Remember that the CotM is not possible without you, so please participate, contribute, discuss, and vote!


Member Entries:


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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 1:50 pm 
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World Class Eejít
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Aaaaaaawwwwwww yeah, jingle time mother [&@%!]!

(Context, isn't it wonderful)

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:11 pm 
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LOL <(^^,)>

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:38 pm 
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World Class Eejít
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(Btw, congrats on hosting your first CoTM! So proud of ya <3 )

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 2:52 pm 
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(Thank you! The best part is that I got to do it now, even though everyone knows I'm not much of a festive person.)

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 3:01 pm 
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World Class Eejít
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Warning: Language
(You don't need to be the jolliest of fellows to have a good time)

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 3:04 pm 
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Lets Let Our Fellow Members Actually Write These Festive Jingles Shall We

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 4:02 pm 
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CotM Winner!
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Oh, sounds fun, I really hope I remember to enter in this. I have no experience making music so anything I make will be terrible (especially if I sing it, which I might well do, so sorry about that) but it should be fun at least. I'll be TESifying an existing Christmas Song. Or make a non-christmas song a TES Christmas Song.

Anyone know how to pronounce Saturalia?

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Sat Dec 03, 2016 1:06 am 
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CotM Winner!
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Here's mine. It's terrible but I couldn't resist submitting one.

Last Saturalia by Clavicus Vile

Lyrics and comments below.
Hidden:
Last Saturalia by Clavicus Vile wrote:
Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

First Bittercup and now my Masque
I give you artefacts
But you give them a pass.
Tell me mortal,
Do you recognize me?
Well,
I have countless forms,
So it wouldn’t surprise me


Rescued the Mutt decided to reward you
Got a Masque so folk would adore you,
Now I know what a fool I've been.
But if you summoned me now
I know you'd fool me again.

Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

A crowded room,
Princes with tired eyes.
We were summoned by you
And you fed us a pack of lies.
Boethiah thought you’d be her champion.
But you put his mail in a chest and put your armor back on.

Masque make you a lover with fire in your heart.
Metal give cover but fights wouldn’t have to start, ooh-hoo.
Think helmets make you less cool but I’m a fool.

Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

Last Saturalia
I gave you my Masque
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special.

Masque make you a lover with a fire in your heart
Metal give you cover but fights wouldn’t have to start
Maybe next year I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone special.

Special...
Ooh...
Yeah...

Clavicus Vile Out


So yeah, pretty self explanatory. It's a song by Clavicus Vile to the theme of Last Christmas by Wham! about the frustration felt when heroes accept your priceless artifacts only to throw them aside because they're jerks who can't appreciate them.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2016 12:12 am 
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Associate
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Lol Kerr :p Now I imagine Clavicus Vile singing like George Michael

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2016 12:54 am 
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World Class Eejít
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O' Great Daedric Siege Crawler
:
Image
O Siege Crawler, o great Siege Crawler
How lovely are thy cruel blades
O Siege Crawler, o great Siege Crawler
How lovely are thy cruel blades


Their screams so red in summertime
Stay bravely drenched in wintertime
O Siege Crawler, o great Siege Crawler
How lovely are thy cruel blades


Let us all remember
In their slaughter and fleeting screams
With their family and friends and loved ones
The real and true meaning of this Crisis
The destruction of all, as so Dagon commands


O Prince of Ruin, o Prince of Plight
How lovely are thy mighty plans
O Prince of All, o Prince Dagon
How lovely are thy bloody grasps


The pillars all please faithfully
Their pleas in Dagon unchangedly
O Siege Crawler, o great Siege Crawler
How lovely are thy most cruel blades

Ha ha ha ha ha

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 12:53 pm 
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Lord of the Shivering Isles
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You better not cry

You better not cry, you better not cry, because i'm telling you why.

Alduin is coming to town, Ta--loss save us! He is burning down the town, he is burning down the town.

You can cry now because you're burning. He knows where you are. He knows when you are dead.

He knows when to eat you. He is one fat dragon.

You better not cry, you better not cry because i'm telling you why.

The Dovahkiin is coming to town.
The Dovahkiin is coming to town.

To kick Alduin's scaly ass!
To Kick Alduin's scaly ass!

Do battle with the thu--um!
Do battle with the thu--um!

They shout at each other.
Each not giving the other quarter.

They know each other's strengths and they are engaging in a battle of the ages.

You better not cry because this is awesome. You better not cry because this is destroying the town.

You can cry if you're on fire. You can cry if he is consuming your soul.

Sovngar-de awwaaaits!
Sovngar-de awwaaaits!

You better not cry because holy talos's beard!
You better not cry because holy Talos's beard!

He suplexed Alduin!
Who does the Dovahkiin think he is?
He suplexed Alduin!
And now he stabbed him in the face.
And now he stabbed him in the face.

He ate Alduin!
He ate Alduin!

And now he killed a chicken!
Get the [&@%!]!
Get the [&@%!] for killing a chicken!

Lynch him, we shaaaall!

Lynch him, we shaaaallll!

We are now bu-rning!
We are now bu-rning!
He just punched out all of our blood!

And now we are dead.

So you better not cry.


Not bad for something I thought of in the space of a few minutes.

What? there's nothing in the rules about it being a cheery song. ;)

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 5:44 pm 
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Penned while under various substance influences.

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Dashing through the snow
With my one horse bound to slay
Over the fields we go
Laughing, bound to slay
Dragon shout will ring
Oh what fun it is to sing a slaying song tonight

Dragon yells, dragon yells
'kiin will yell, 'kiin will yell
Shout it all the way
Oh! What fun it is to ride
For a one-horse dragon slay

'kiin will yell, 'kiin will yell
Shout it all the way
Oh! What fun it is to ride
For a one-horse dragon slay!

A day or two ago
I thought I'd take a ride
And soon my ally Odavhviing
Was gliding by my side
The horse was cheap unpatched
A bug-out seemed his lot
He got into a glitched-out skip
And I learned console commands

A day or two ago
This story I must yell
I went out on the snow
And on my patch I fell
A dev was riding by
Nerfed the one-horse dragon slay
He laughed as I lay flaming there
And quickly drove away

Now the snow is white
Go it while you're young
Take the spouse tonight
And shout the slaying song

Shout Fus Ro Dah all day
"Kill dragons" be your creed
Hitch them for a glorious slay
And crack! The game you've beat

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 10:06 pm 
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Mars told me to enter.
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I have a little dagger. I made it out of Steel.

And when it's cold and sharp, with dagger I'll make veal.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, I made it out of Steel.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, with dagger I'll make veal.

It has a lovely blade, with edge so sharp and thin.

I cut just right and then I go to the inn!
dagger, dagger, dagger, with edge so sharp and thin.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, then I go to the inn!

My dagger's always ready. It loves to dance and spin.

A lovely filet of meat, come now let's begin.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, it loves to dance and spin.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger. Come now let's begin.

I have a little dagger. I made it out of Steel.

When it's cold and sharp, with dagger I'll make veal.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, I made it out of Steel.
Oh dagger, dagger, dagger, with dagger I'll make veal.


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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2016 6:15 pm 
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Goatmom/Moderator
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It's the 22nd! And very late on my watch, oops. Submissions are now closed. Vote for your favourite song and composer until the 30th!

A big "Thank You" to everyone who submitted an entry, especially myself.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Thu Dec 22, 2016 6:31 pm 
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That's what happens when you focus too much on hoarding UESP points.

If I win, I will be very surprised as I literally made it up as i went along. They say that it was the song that drove me insane. Others claim that if you hear this song, you best get out of the city. For Alduin is coming. The Nords fear the World Eater but revere the Dovahkiin. An immortal Dovah fights a mortal Dovah. Natural predators fighting to the very death. One, a Dovah that shrugged his duty away and enslaved the ancient races of man and beast. The other, Akatosh's fist. Both do battle. Both destroy more then the other. It is said that he will return but the other will not. For the other ate the first. The other burnt a creature of Bal to ashes. It was foretold that the battle of these two would happen but not on mundus. If you see these two in your town, you better not cry because you will be stunned by the awesomeness that is the Worldeater fighting The Dovahkiin.

Lock up your chickens.
Hide your swords.
For Alduin is coming.

Alduin is coming.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2016 11:09 pm 
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Go Kerr!

MetaCthulhu deserves an honourable mention, though.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 1:19 pm 
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Lord of the Shivering Isles
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Kerr is a known synth and is likely hacking the poll to boost his way to victory! The wrapper in my hands says it is and it is true! Vote Dovah to make UESP's COTM DOvah again!

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 1:32 pm 
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World Class Eejít
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There is nothing synth about that majestic voice. When in doubt, keep voting Kerr

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 1:35 pm 
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Lord of the Shivering Isles
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He is 99% machine and I saw him consume an entire toaster! How is that not evidence he is a synth!? He ate a toaster! And now he is lasering random people and I suddenly remember that Rooster Teeth Video. Basically, Kerr is that robot.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 6:26 pm 
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CotM Winner!
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I'm nonbinary. Computers operate in binary. Ergo not a synth. Although some people would say that makes me more like a robot, hmm, better not mention that, they'll get suspicious.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 7:54 pm 
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Lord of the Shivering Isles
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Kerr is a Synth! I've seen him do Synthy stuff! He is paid by Apple to win COTMs via cheating just to boost their Istuff sales by slowly assimulating UESP!

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 7:44 am 
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Tweet tweet! Last day of voting! I'm closing the poll approximately 12 hours after posting this, so get in gear if you haven't voted yet.

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 2:43 pm 
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Lord of the Shivering Isles
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Vote Dovah!

He'll give you a....

FREE CAR!

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 Post subject: Re: Competition of the Month - December Ho ho ho Edition
PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 5:13 pm 
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Goatmom/Moderator
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Hey guess what, I'm super late again and Kerr is the winner. Again. Congrutalions!

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